The saddest song I've ever heard
the lyrics of Miss Mockingbird
her pain it rails aloud in verse
who doomed her to this bitter curse?
her words they soothe, yet tear my heart
as love lies bleeding, torn apart.
I sent a message, just to see
If at her mercy I could be
in friendship fair across the miles
joined in pain and lovelorn smiles
this siren I have never known
with knowing smile and broken bones
replied with grace at once to this
and left me with an angels kiss.

He's nowhere near good enough for you and he knows it.
You're far to good for me, I know it.
That kiss we shared, the one you won't mention, the one that turned from friendly peck to clashing tongues and breathless eyes
will be my nirvana
everlasting.

I hate jigsaws,
****** happy pictures
cut into shapes
so we can
put them back together
and smile at how far we've come,
only to rip them apart
and scatter their pieces
haphazardly
without a shred of care.
I hate jigsaws
they remind me of what we've become
they remind me that the word human has no place within the word humanity anymore.

My darling you could keep my heart in your locker
but your Dad is a wrestler, your brothers are Dockers,
so on our hot lovin' they have put the mockers
'cause I  don't have the guts to face violent cockblockers.

You like to take selfies
You sure like to ROFL
You taught me of two girls, one cup and blue waffles
Your knowledge is endless on things such as these
If only your brothers weren't so hard to please.

They think I'm a man *****, a bounder, a cad,
a love shy lothario, a bit of a "lad"
on this I won't argue, the point is well made
but I'm young (ish) and ***** and like to get laid.

They think you're an angel
but that's not the case
'cause the photos you sent me
were not of your face....

I hear the rain as it hits the glass
no need to open the drapes
the summer all but disappeared
no more sunshine escapes.
We were planning on a picnic
as a way to pass the time
good food, good friends a kickabout,
a glass or two of wine.
My enthusiasm dampened
I stumble out of bed
and ***** around for caffeine
to lively up my head
While stood here in my kitchen
my heart sinking, feeling blue
I thought I'd pen a little verse,
a "hello" from me to you.
I'm sitting at the table
striped pyjamas, coffee cup
when a thought it hit my addled brain
and really cheered me up
We shall have our sunshine picnic
though the sun no longer shines
I have 20 golf umbrellas (don't ask!)
large and gaudy in design.
So we'll take them to the shoreline
and what a sight we'll be
Lining up there like a rainbow
my friends, my boy and me.

a collaboration with Calpurnia Mockingbird*

If you have something to say, say it. Don't bite your tongue, swallow those words down, set them free.

Set them free that I may hear them, feel them crashing into my consciousness and lifting up my eyes to yours.

Make a wish as candles gutter, wish for me, for us, for an end to this mess of limbs and longing.

Say your prayers, kneel before all that you've ever wanted and plead for remorse.

Sing your song, others may dance to the melody but the rhythm will always be ours alone.

Write me a letter in indelible ink, that those words will always stain my world and sting my eyes.

Take my hand, my beating heart within your palm, so the world may know that once, we loved.

There's a message in my inbox
from a pretty little thing
you know the type blonde hair, tight ***
and words that drip with sin

I'm betting she's a live one
a goer, a screamer, a ride
I bet she'd let me tip her up
and venture deep inside

I reckon I could have her
in positions one and all
while screaming out "yeah baby"
"take it sugar, take it all!"

You'd here our skin a'slapping
as our bodies slam with vigour
as she pushes back against my nuts
I'm feeling like a winner

I'll think of her days later
though not quite as you'd think
she'll come to mind when I apply
the "clap" cream to my ****.

So the moral of this story
this tale of itching woe
is that fun can soon backfire
when you dip your wick in **'

Why finger paint on paper
why use paper at all?
These tiny prints of blue and red
look great on the living room wall.

The purple suits the bathroom
while the kitchen's in the pink.
the green attacked the bathtub
as the black conquered the sink.

The hallway's like a rainbow
coloured smears for all to see
the bedroom wall? an explosion
in a skittles factory!

Oh I see! It was an accident!
Your fingers ran amok
hyper loaded with these colours
and their spree you couldn't stop!

You stand there flushed, with tear in eye
while staring at your shoes,
as I pull my best angry face,
it fails, you look too cute.

You know what works, though young in years
a Jedi knight in 'jamas,
your mind tricks quickly smoothing out
My rage at each disaster.

I take full responsibility,
this mantra now my own,
never have a lie-in
when Picasso-boy is home.

Funny how a photograph can pump blood
I only have one of you, it isn't mine
it sits here backlit
shared with all that would gladly drown in those mischief eyes.
Your smile, a moment of calm, a second of perfection caught, always brings my own.
There is no beauty like yours, no work of art has ever made me want to overflow with passion the way you do. I could write countless poems, a thousand odes to your dimples, a million sonnets to your curls, a billion lovesongs to your eyes to no avail. So I'll laugh at your jokes, and be a sturdy shoulder, a friend.  I'll wish the best for you always, while your heart keeps my secret safe. Poets shouldn't fall in love with the unloved, there aren't enough words to describe the agony.

I hated leaving you there
while your skin is still transparent,
while your steady heart is shaking,
your lungs scarred from silent screaming
and your eyes haunted by the unseen.

You stood waving in the rain
hoping it would drown your tears
and disguise the effort behind your smile.
I drove away, platitudes delivered
and hope left behind to flourish in your care.
You stood waving in the rain and in that moment
your fragile beauty caught my spirit
and all was beyond me.
I hate goodbyes.

I came across a fool today
hiding behind a profile
used for spite and hate
a pitiful soul
wrapped warmly
in unjustified ego
Words meant to hurt
did so, I fear
for his momentary satisfaction
a cunning smile twisted on his filth filled mouth
while the sun now threatens to leave my sky
it's light forever diminished.

Today is repost day
it's official
I'm reading and posting at a furious pace
I will share your words until your name is all I see
the ones I loved, the ones you hate, the ones I missed.
Each one a blessing to my eyes and heart.
I do this, not for you but for me.
Me, your friend
sat in disbelief that your name will be no more
that you will no longer sing the words of your heart into my eager soul.
This campaign of hate that has brought about the end, I will **** it's author to hell.
I hope they read this and smile, it will not linger, trust me.
They may hide behind walls and throw stones at your heart, their yellow bellies jiggling with laughter while your tears stain your skin, your light dimmed by their spite.
There is such cruelty in this place of beauty and love.
So today will be filled with you, in the hope that you see that you are so much better than they say you are, in every way. You are loved. You belong here. They do not.

Wakey Wakey, rise and shine
greet the morning with a smile
wide awake and feeling fine
dancing with this boy of mine.

Twisting on the kitchen floor
the monkey, the jive and many more,
the mashed potato, the hustle too
he follows my lead with a giggle or two.

There's a hound dog, a jailhouse, some blue suede shoes
as we Rave On  with Buddy and Peggy Sue
Reet Petite makes an entrance and whips up the crowd
"Turn it up Daddy, I want this real loud!"

Then on to the Land of a Thousand Dances
even the dog's grinning wide as she prances
we take Three Steps to Heaven and meet Cathy's clown
then on to the next one, no time to sit down.

So I'll fry up the bacon as my little bug jitters
and poach us some eggs with some sweet 'tato fritters
as I sing of Lucille, Maggie may and Delilah,
then Shake Rattle and Roll to those Great ***** Of Fire.

I'm feeling a little bit prickly
Like the ******* son of a porcupine
created on a misspent night with an over amorous cactus.

I'm trying to shake it off,
staring at blank paper
while it flips me the bird
as I **** into the wind,
feeling like the next government health warning
model looks on a ***** billboard
my edges tattered

Friends'll get you nowhere but down
thats life in a nutshell
pettiness and spite reign all
in "hallowed halls"
however nicely put.

Calls unanswered, messages lost
delivery reports mock my waiting
and bristle my backbone
with their happy chimes.
I want to slap myself so hard that my skin rings
but to what purpose.

Stupid is as stupid does,
the new mantra
stick it on a t shirt for the "tourists"
with the obligatory hashtag
for the smiley faced patronisers
.com .org  .bored

I want to shake you
Scream into your face
are you blind?
made of stone?
I want to guide your hand
give you a nudge
a hint....a clue
but it is forbidden.

You see, I've knocked on that door,
more than once
I've prayed to whoever, whatever, that she would open it, just enough to feel my love.
You only had to smile and the locks, once rusted, turned with ease.

I've clutched at straws, held her so tightly, dried her tears, praying that she'd see me....

She only sees you.
Just you.
In every raindrop.
In every storm.
In every leaf that's ever fallen.
In every rotation of this planet
You.

She never speaks your name,
She sings it
To a melody so haunting that it captures all that hear it
a symphony of sorrow
as a heart once laid to rest starts to beat, to believe....then to mourn.

She loves you, though she always swore it was a lie.
She loves you, though she promised not to.
She loves you, I see it, in every smile that lays tangled within her confusion, her tangible fear.

I can only love her from afar
I can only wonder at her strength
as she protects your heart at the expense of her own
as I wait to pick up her shattered pieces once more.

Shut up, quiet, zippit
hush now, silence please
be quiet for a second
and listen....
Do you hear it...
Take a second...
There!
What do you hear?

I wish I'd closed my ears
late last night.
I wish I hadn't heard
the riot you put as my ringtone.

It was him.
Defences shot up at his voice
usually gruff and hateful
now tear drenched and fearful.
My mind played word tag
filtering out emotion.
Found, out cold, machine breather, for now.

Today they'll wake you
from my nightmare
and plunge you back into yours.

They say "the signs are good"
A term I find strange.
How can a purposeful dance with death
Ever be a good sign.

I do enjoy your poems
but his I cannot stand
and now I find, to my surprise
you might be the same man

Although the names are different,
the scathing natures strong
and now I read that others here
have thought it all along!

Though yours have some intelligence
and his are total *****
There's something so familiar
In the way both of you write

So I'll sit back and ponder this a while
a mystery its true
then maybe get the nerve to ask
is Loghain Carvo you?

You smiled today,
just for a second,
and your smile lit a spark
that coloured the cosmos with love.

Hanging from the rockface
fingers chalked, knuckles white
breathing in the view.
Feeling the rush, hearing the roar
gulls circle above, as you run below,
small against the landscape
kicking up sand and laughter
begging to join me up here
pleading to play with grapples and knots
no fear of falling, no fear at all,
there is no danger in danger when you're 6
Not when your Dad is Spiderman.

for Cally*

Stay. With me
I won't let you go
I can't, I refuse.
After all you've done,
let me help you.
Please.

Stay. With us.
We won't let you fall
We'll catch you
and hold you close
until the tears dry.

Stay, do it
for you, for me
for whatever reason you choose
but do it
I need you,
you need this.

Stay.
It'll all work out.
I promise
with all my heart
to take care of you
I took my eye off the ball
but no more I swear.

Stay.
Be here, with us
your friends
you may not love yourself
but you are loved
more than you know.

Stay.

The look on your face
as you realised you were still here
sent me reeling and shattered my soul
as your tiny voice in the silence cried "why?"

Dog lies baskin'
music blastin'
barbecue cookin'
beer chillin'
friends laughin'
kids playin'
Sitting on my sweet ***
procrastinatin'
no scarf, no coat
no socks, no shoes
These are the cures for the summertime blues.

I call you for dinner
at the roast beef you glare
you sulk at the table
and kick at my chair
"I don't want it" you cry
"I hate veggies" you moan
but a young boy can't live on Mcnuggets alone!

You call me a meanie
you say it's not fair
to make you eat green stuff
"I won't eat it, so there!"

You hunch up your shoulders
arms crossed, lips shut tight
your stare is defiant
as you fight for your right
to eat what you want to
and do as you please
my 5 year old rebel
with scabs on both knees

You'll eat it eventually
and I'll secretly laugh
'cause round two is coming
I'm running your bath!

Go grab your wetsuit
your sunblock and wax
go get a clean towel
put them all in your pack
I'll watch as the sun beams from your face
and feel the breeze stirred by your running flip-flopped feet
I'll laugh as you shout "YES" and fistpump the air
This is us.
Our thing.
We.
Surfs up li'l dude!

There's a woman in a window and she know that I can see,
she's removing all her clothing and she's looking right at me
She removes her bra and throws it as her ******* hit the floor
Pantygirdle passes varicose knees and now I do implore
I'm all for helping people out
and age is just a number
but Maudie Lee from #23
would tear this boy asunder.
So I quickly draw the curtains
cause I'm sure she's feeling fruity
she's 85, wears a Beehive,
that's beyond the call of duty.

My heart skipped a beat
as she walked down my street
and this cynical soul was ablaze
I stepped to her side
filled with foolish pride
and asked her to go on a date.
She smiled oh so sweetly
and whispered discreetly
The Farmers Arms at 3 pm
theyre showing the footie
upon the big telly
So be there and I'll see you then.
I floated on homeward
a Goddess I'd found
with a love of the beautiful game
I showered and suited
and cologned up and booted
to see this fair lady again.
I got to the Farmers as kick off was looming
the full bar my eyes deftly scanned
there she stood dressed in red
my poor heart filled with dread
as my feet stumbled back to the door
A united fan? That wasn't the plan
as I picked up my heart from the floor
her beauty delighted but love for United
is a flaw that just can't be ignored!

Waking up
here comes the day
all it's glory
packed away
I light a smoke
and greet the sun
with last night's liquor on my tongue
my eyes they burn
my head feels cracked
I'm far too old for nights like that!

I'm reading your words in my hospital bed
Either laughing or crying at all that is said
I must look quite crazy as my mind is lead
through a hundred emotions poured out from your head.
The nurses are pretty, they keep me well watered
The plaster is some kind of cruel itching torture
the weights on a pully hoist my broken leg
forbidding escape from my blue sheeted bed.
So I wink at the nurses and turn on the charm
I smile at them sweetly as they take my arm
this won't hurt a bit, just a scratch.. so I tell her
she can hurt what she likes if she kisses it better.
She raises her eyebrows and then starts to laugh
as I discuss my need for another spongebath
the colour it rises and forms in her cheeks
You can't blame me for trying, I'm stuck here for weeks!

Sat alone
Coffee hot
words absorbed
some great, some not.

the heartbroken girl,
the talentless hack
and the triumphant ego,
keep bringing me back.

Reality withers
as I waste my time
scribbling meaningless ditties
and making them rhyme.

I should just stay a reader
that much is now clear
so I'll pour me another
and spend the day here.

The morning rain
incessantly taps my window
in hope of response.
It calls me down to frosted beaches
with tarnished rocks and angry seas.
There lays the peace my soul desires,
amongst the waves my heart once claimed as home.

The season is upon us
it's time for peace and joy
that is for those who live without
a wound up little boy.
His eyes brim with excitement
as he stares up at the tree
while jumping round from foot to foot
his passion plain to see.
He sits there at the window
His eyes they scan the sky
for any sign of Santa and his reindeer passing by.
I tell him it's too early, I say it isn't time
yet still he sits there waiting
and keeps a watchful eye.
He runs to bed at bedtime
excited now to sleep
as sleeping makes the time fly by
as closer Christmas creeps.
He's counting down the hours
as day turns into night,
with a jolly shout of "FOUR MORE SLEEPS !!"
he goes out like a light.

It took
2 years
1 shrink,
2 consultants,
and several "experts"
to draw the conclusion
that my son is "special"
You'd think with all that book learning
They'd tell me something I don't already know.
How many exams to define love?
How many degrees to diagnose wonder?
How many recommendations of care
before they realise
that I am he
and he is me
and that is all the care we need.

Is HP now a T.V guide?
It drives me to distraction
to see these adds on the front page
when I want some poem action.
Our poets are all writing
and posting stuff to read
but the room is being taken up
by adds for crap tv.
So listen up dear spammers
this warning you should heed
shove your ****** adverts
anywhere but on my feed!!

My niece came round for dinner
promising lots of laughs
with pizza and a movie
since I'm stuck here on my ****
she brought a pepperoni
good and spicy just for me
the DVD she brought along
added the extra cheese.
It was a tale of vampires
poor persecuted folks
that fall in love with schoolgirls
as I sat waiting for the jokes
The fun was not forthcoming
thought my niece seemed quite enthralled
with this badly acted nightmare
as I sat there appalled
I saw a good bit coming
as the blazing sun shone down
on the pasty long dead hero
thinking that in flames he'd drown.
I waited for destruction
for the burning pain to start
Instead the ****** twinkled
like a little glowing star.
I've never seen such *******
such complete and utter crap
as our pasty long dead hero
glowed inside the vampire trap.
By the end my niece was crying
and frankly so was I
when she reached down for the sequel
with a tear still in her eye.
I told her I was fine now
I begged her to go home
I told her I was happy
to be here on my own.
But the little brat insisted
that I watch the whole ****** lot
I told her it's a broken leg
not a lobotomy I've got.
I quickly sent her packing
back to her own sweet home
with her ****** little box set
and to leave me well alone.

The kids they just keep coming
and knocking on my door
expecting tons of candy
then a bellyache I'm sure!
The Mummy, Count Dracula, Frankenstein too
Cruella and Yoda and Sweet ****** doo
I love all their costumes, there's been no sight finer
'cause I used to trick or treat in a bin liner!

I arrived.
Crashing
Wailing
Screaming
I am grown.
What's changed?

I hate being up in the morning
every morning the same,
rising with no hope of relief
I mean, why bother?
There's no warmth to nestle in,
no dark to slip into
no sweet scented dew
to take this ache from my head.
Frankly I feel mocked,
as though old beady eye is thumbing his nose,
laughing maniacally at my frustration
He deserves a beating,
to be pounded with fervour
but I wouldn't give him the satisfaction.
So I sit and smoke
giving my best thousand yard stare
rivalling Clint Eastwood,
while he stands proudly smirking,
defiant, unyielding
a stand off, silent
as I ignore his twitchy responses to my stoic suffering
His resolve only stiffening mine
as I refuse to make his day.

Today's the day,
The big one
The prize fight.
4 weeks of intensive training,
religiously practising our art
sleepless nights and drawing boards
anxiety yours, headscratching, mine
have brought us to this fated hour.
This sainted day shall bring a fight
unto vanilla death
but we Jakes men are strong of heart
and you wear your cape of courage well
as we set out with trusted hound
to defend our fortress
and to mock with disdain
the keeps of our rivals.

Take up your arms!
Hold steady...
On my word...
CHARGE!!

Let the sand castle competition begin.

What if I told you that I loved you? What if I told you that you bring morning to life, that you are the sole character of every dream, positions varying, unlike your silent gaze.

What if I told you that your smile lights my sky better than any star could, what then?
That I have cried at your words a thousand times, as syllables needle sharp fight their war to hold you together, while I can only watch as he knowingly rips you apart.

These words are mine, thrown by my jealous tongue at your fools institution. Words of love to the jaded (though you'd say wise). Everyday you fade as I watch the horizon, hoping for your smile.
What if?

For my Superhero*

If you want it you'll find it
it hides no more from you
than you hide from it.

Dig your heels in,
grit your teeth.
Rejection is an ***,
kick it.
Hard.

That dream you hold,
not the car, or the money,
the one your mind chases in still moments.
Grasp it by the *****.
Run with it.
Start!

Be you, every bit of you.
The original.
Not the one painted over by other artists,
be your own influence.
Let your heart define you as a man,
nothing else.

I love you is not a key to her door, 
never use it as such.
Take your time,there is no finish line,
no race to win.

Kiss deeply, always like the French, never like a goldfish.
Tell her she's beautiful, every day, even on days when it's not true. 

Don't laugh at her jokes if they're not funny, she'll know your faking,
Instead say her joke was crap, if she laughs, she's a keeper!

My theory has been proven son
when all is said and done
this ethos is the very one
that landed me your mum.

My love for you grows daily
You with your words that cut
like straight edged razors
You with your poems that speak of love
You with your constant melancholy drip
You with your stories of life
I read your heart
I drink your tears
I am consumed by you.
You.
Sweet
Wonderful
Heartbroken
You.

The lady is an hourglass
A real endearing shape
her eyes have got me grounded
her gaze I can't escape.

The lady is an hourglass
voluptous and curvy
and to be fair, her longing stare
is making me feel pervy.

The lady is an hourglass
and not just skin and bone
she makes me want to dim the lights
and disconnect the phone.

The lady is an hourglass
she looks like she'd be fun
as she smiles at the discomfort
that she seems to cause my mum.

The lady is an hourglass
into her I'd  gladly fall
if she wasn't made of paper
and taped to my bedroom wall.