My parents is the villain of my story
Misguided me into love that is not healthy
They say “we do this because we love you” then yet continue to ignore me.
Is this enough for me to call them the villain of my story?
Who is the villain of my story?

The people who betrayed me are the villain of my story.
Including my siblings who never reached out and played me *****.
Including the system who put me through constant fear to gain control over me.
Including all the people that manipulates me into thinking that hardwork is the key, not the mentality.
But is it enough tho to be called the villain of my story?

Who is the real villain of my story?

I am.. I am the villain of my story
I am who has the self doubt,
Ignores all the blessed glory.
I am who brought the disaster in my story
I am who blame the others for my worry
I am who has control over me and yet let other people walked all over me.
I am who didn’t stand up for myself because I fear everyone will left me.
I am,
It’s me.
It’s not them.
I let them.
I am the villain of my story.

People thinks she is mean,
Some say shes hard to get,
But they just don’t know what it means
To be treated bad, by the guy she trusted hard.

People say she has the heart of stone.
But they just don’t understand
She has to put her heart on guard because
He doesn’t use his heart but uses his Hand

She let go of her past and start something new
Became strong and fearless
But something blew
The fate been ruthless

The guy return to win her
But little did he know she is all brand New.
He buys her ring and
Introduce her to all his crew

But he still the same, full of promises less of action
Full of adjectives but less of verbs
He thinks he is some kind of Prince Charming in some kind of animation
That either make her day or leave her aching for days.

The queen is the new King
Let her reign her castle
And see how she nailed that thing
Without any hustle ;)

The so called “prince” left her
But she remain strong,
The manipulation does not affect her.
She took a hit through a ****
And realize where she truly Belongs

The girl that used to be beaten up by manipulations
Is now a woman with no Fears,
She asked for recognition for going through war with no gears.

She recognized herself, realized she doesn’t need validation…
So Slayyyy my Queeing

You are so beauteous
your smile is enchanting
your eyes is so precious
you are very admirable and loving

you amuse me, delight me and laugh with me
i felt i dont deserve you,
or you dont deserve me
with you i felt free...

until...
we had a fight, the person i thought that will save me.
is the person that wrecked me.
i lost my self esteem, the light become darkness
happiness become sadness
love become madness.. to anger.. to hatred

you didnt hurt me physically,
but the selfless, narcissistic action of yours
****** me up emotionally
You gave me roses but handed me the thorn first.

i am love and i cant denied it,
Love made me barely eat,
Love message you even its late. that eventhough your taking so long to respond, its okay love will wait.

but you hurt me over and over again,
and im still here for you eventhough you are so vain.
because i have faith that you will change
cause i thought we are in the same ******* page...
We once used to be in the same page.

the wound you gave me did not appear in my body
but hurts more than anything that bleeds
I become blind, because of wanting for you to love me so badly
i cant even tell if this still what love means.

if the wounds on my heart and the bruises on my soul translated into my skin, you would probably recognize it.

You know the feeling of pain,
Without hurting you physically,
Doing anything you can, but its just shame
This emotion still ******* you up slowly.

There is no formula or equation,
To forget the woman you used to love.
Theres no cure into broken relation
But let go and give it all to the Above.

I begged to God, to heal the broken heart
You chooses to break my heart into pieces.
You choosed to be apart.
My respect for you decreases.
My love for you change into Pity and empathy.

Yet I still think you deserved kindness.
You still deserved love even though you chooses to make me feel the word loneliness.

It’s not your fault that nobody’s taught you how to love.
Nobody taught you how to be gentle.

Let's see.
I'm not sure when and how it started, why it is strong
i seems happy, no one think anything's wrong.
Screaming for someone to see
that the happy smile and carefree is not the real me.
The feeling of everything is messed up, and all you wanna do is to break free.
Poetry, Poetry, Help us to let everyone everyone see, whats actually bothering me.  ✍

They will love you at your best
laugh at your jokes.
you give all the rest,
call them Besties, honey and Folks.

until they met someone else,
boyfriend, another friend, and bestfriend
little do they know its all acquiatances
but thats what they called Friend

Basically world is full of survivors
no one cares at all..
but trust me if you chooses to forfeit the battle,
everyone ask and wonder why?
sometimes they cry,
because they dont like how you say goodbye,
now they will call you their friends,
but sorry folks everything Ends...

I wasn’t the one for you, and at first it hurt. But I’ve come to terms with the fact the stars weren’t aligned for us, and that’s OK. It took me a while to get to this point of content and there are things I want you to know:
I realize I wanted things I couldn’t have.
I wanted late mornings and nights in your embrace, I wanted to go on drives with you, and to laugh with you because I love seeing you smile. I wanted to give myself to you, to tell you how guarded I am and then let you in because I wanted you to be able to see a part of me that no one else does. I wanted to know more about your childhood and how you grew up to be who you are. I wanted to know your goals and aspirations, your personal heroes, and most importantly, I wanted to be yours. I wanted it so badly, but you didn’t choose me.

You missed out.
I could have given you everything and more. You didn’t even give me a chance, which if you did you would find I hate the feeling of velvet and that I’m the most claustrophobic person in the world. I publicly embarrass myself on the regular. I love to sing in the shower, I would dance with you in a torrential downpour because I'm a hopeless romantic, and that I have the ability to eat a pint of mint chocolate chip ice-cream without shame. I am who I am--no excuses, and I know you appreciate real people. If I learned anything about you… I did learn that. You would never have to question my loyalty to you, but I guess now you never will.
But, most importantly:
Thank you for not choosing me
I never thought I’d say these words, but thank you for breaking my heart and not choosing me. I realize that, because of you not choosing me, it’s going to be amazing when I’m someone else’s first choice.
One day, someone is going to feel for me the way I felt for you and you’ll be nothing more than a distant memory.
Thank you for coming into my life and making me realize that I am as strong and independent as I hoped I could be. For that, you taught me to choose myself, and I’ll continue to do that until someone comes around and makes me realize why it didn’t work out with you.
All this time I asked myself “what is wrong with me?” and I realized that it has nothing to do with that. I wasn’t what you wanted, and that’s fine. You made me realize that I am going to be the perfect fit for someone else, and that someone is going to come along and choose me without thinking twice.
And just so you know, I didn’t necessarily choose you either — my heart did

i thought you were the person of my dreams
you just knows how to make me feel special
you change my self esteem
you have the perfect ******.

my favorite thing about you is your smell
its like earth, gardens, and herbs
whenever i smell the fresh leaf, it always ring a bell

you reached for my mind and heart first
before touching my waist, hips or my lips
your absence made me thirst
i called you exquisite first

id be lying if i said you make me speechless
but the truth is you made my tongue so weak
that make me so wordless
and don't know what language to speak.

your name is the strongest positive and negative implication
in any language,
either makes my day or
leaves me aching for days.

You said you like me for who i am
you put my hopes up
but still chooses to give up
You are just one of them.

Goodbye.

Someone asked me,
what's the scariest part?

i silently reply
If me and you get apart,
part of me dies,
you stole my heart,
Darkness in sky start to see,
the old bluish beautiful clouds becomes shady,
seeing you walking, but not towards me,
I don't know what to say,
I’m wondering where you’ve been,
i don't beg for someone to stay.
but I am asking you now my queen , so please stay,
Stay for the promises we've made,
Stay for the risk that we take,
Stay . . .
Please Stay . . .

and she walks away.
Im sorry? what is the scariest part?
Loving her. . .

People change for a reasons
either their minds have been opened
or their hearts have been broken
It's not because they like it for some reason

People change for a reasons
either their in love
or they think their in Above
It's not because of the Season

People change for a Reason
either their in pain
or their just in vain
It's not because of people.

But no matter what your reason is,
As long it makes you happy
You got no worries
Because it doesn't make you feel ******.

i need your love babe,
Guess you know its true
Hope you need my love babe,
Just as much as i need you.

I need your presence babe
as much as you do
i did everything i could
but still not enough for you.

I need you..

We used to have connection together
but what happened now
we end up being stranger
Wow! you amaze me,
every time we talk to each other,
but you rather choose to avoid me,
deny me and hurt like no others.

You told me to be productive with you,
build some happy memories that made you,
you said i don't have to prove anything,
but you make me feel that i need to prove a lot of things,
You said you wouldn't imagine of me hating myself
but you made not just hating, also insecurities, anger and not worthy.

But there is a but! I am so glad that i met you
I didn't even regret meeting you, because
You make me happy even though in a little bit of time, because
You makes me say that i want you to be mine, because
You are more beautiful than the gold in Mines
Because You...
wrecked but also made me realized,
that not all you want is what you need
that everything you expect is no what you get
Everything is all gonne be Fine... </3