You turn real ugly when gambling
Someone completely new
Feelings end up getting hurt
By monstrosity you morph into

Lightning strikes ground between us
Bolt rippling through the earth
Just want to understand
How much tension these games are worth

It's like you depart this planet
Moment you begin
Nothing left behind here matters
Long as you win

You load account the first time
Dominoes start to fall
It's deposit after deposit
Until nothing left to spend at all

Spiraling downward swifter than bullets
You continue to accelerate
Convinced answer is sending a larger amount
Balance decreasing at alarming rate

You're sure I'm trying to nag and *****
Dousing in negativity
Swear that isn't my intention
Just desperate to make you see

My objections come from place of concern
I've seen you make the same mistake
No matter the repercussions you never learn
How many disasters does it take?

And only after you're down on your knees
In corner trapped with nowhere to go
You regret your reckless behavior
Demanded to reap what you did sow

You have zero temperance
In regards to this addiction
Put above everything else
Even when causing friction

You'll slouch there hours on end
Staring at seductive screen
Until every penny is blown
All or nothing-there's no in-between

It is irrelevant who's it is
If accessible it's fair game
Possible consequences ignored
Not experiencing any shame

You aquire most of the money
When you've earned I bite my words back
Have every right to waste it
I do my best to cut you some slack

But when feeling the first symptoms
Impossible to not be mad
Frustrated sick and pondering
The pile of dope we could have had

But even worse when it's my funds
Thrown right down the drain
Too selfish to share winning opportunities
Enough to drive a person insane

And when I dare offer advice
Urging you to cash-out
Pleas are an inconvenience
Judgement automatically doubt

So have no choice but helplessly watch
Your balance goes up and down
Even when succeeding half the time
Still eventually drown

Of course going to criticize
Irresponsible actions
You lash out at me claiming
I am a distraction

It must be easier blaming me
Take responsibility for decisions
Uncaring that hurtful remarks
Construct undeniable division

Your irrationality unnerves me
Ultimately pushing me away
Sacrificing anything for one more spin
Blind to price you pay

She left me like
Brutus left Caesar
like a shark attack.
My back was bent and
bleeding, and I was well
versed in delirium.

She had the electricity
shut off the day after
she abandoned me, and I drank
myself into a new oblivion.
There were kittens in
the wall--shadows tall and hot,
and I was well-versed
in delirium.

I stole Four Locos' from
the convenience store, but
not enough to keep
the goblins at bay.
They chased me through
my nightmare--molested
me at dawn.
The elixir exorcised the monsters.
But I often misplaced it,
in the dryer or fireplace.
The meat began to rot in
the freezer, and I was
well-versed in delirium.

My moonflowered brain thought
the cat tree was
a person.
I paced the floor and
talked to it; asked questions,
sought solace.
Degradation of the
mind reached critical mass.
And I landed in the
psych ward again.
The bats brought seizures,
and cheesecake, and yogurt
berry parfaits that were
to die for.
I was well-versed in
delirium

Sliding of beads
So therapeutic
To see how this became that
What makes up the whole
                           Touch each fraction

No need for equation of form
To find value of one emotion
                               Against a known
Or
Tangents
Or
Ometries
When the only calculus of interest
                                    Is sum of self

No experience required
No camouflage
Just patience
         Suppleness of thought

Windsocks tell of things
                     Beyond control
Slight shifts
Reflect calm
                      Between chaos

Whilst watching windsocks
Opinions rest
Until hit by storm
      Then shift in an instant