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Apr 2018
I'm walking through the days
Feeling nothing at all
I'm not sure how long ive been like this
I cant seem to recall

Its quite odd you see
As it doesnt bother me
Its just a void of nothing
Is it just being carefree?

I'm not hot
I'm not cold
I'm not sad
I'm not happy
I'm not depressed
I'm not broken


Its just nothing

I don't understand
How a person can be so empty
I smile and laugh, I cry and scream
I do all those normal things
And everyone believes
What good does that bring?
That I can put on a show
I'm like a robot learning human movementsΒ Β 
No matter what, there is room for improvement

I'm a shell of a person
A shadow of who I am
Am I meant to feel emotions
Am I meant to know who I am
Because its really quite odd
Learning all these actions
For everything thing that I do
Leads to human interactions

They say I am trustworthy
They say I am kind
They say that they know me
So why do they lie

You're the only one I trust
Thats not true
I won't tell anyone
Its obvious you will
You understand better then anyone
I really don't
I need you
No you don't
Stay with me
I'll do my best

I Love you
You're feeding me words laced with poison

The pain, the hurt, the happiness
The anger, the betrayal, the lies
But knowing everything
I still do nothing
I merely watch.
Tying my own hands
Securing them behind my back
I feel and see everything.
But these feelings are not mine

I'm lost within myself
I know no other life
I forget my own problems
By taking on someone else's life

So where are my own feelings?
Where are my problems?
Where are all the things that make me human?
For I have nothing, Nothing on my own
I'm just an empty void

I sold everything
For the need to be W A N T E D.
I'm myself but I'm not
This is who I am
I ignore my own problems by focusing on others
Its not healthy but its the way I work
I have been at it for so long that without it
I feel nothing, Nothing at all
All of this just because I wanted to feel needed and wanted by other people
Its pretty pathetic if you ask me
Nyx
Written by
Nyx  23/F/Shadows of the Opera
(23/F/Shadows of the Opera)   
487
         Sam, Red, Dev, ---, Rick the shoe shine boy and 2 others
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