Sometimes, helping others sinks you; you lose yourself after it ends
Maybe if I was more selfish, I could have stayed longer.
If I was busier, I wouldn’t be paranoid.
If I knew someone that loved me like I loved them, I wouldn’t be distraught.
My limits weren’t my limits; they were my parents.
Not true. I never stood up to them.
Did I really love you if I never stood up for you?
In the end, the problem was me; I wasn’t careful.
We lost our spark.
I’m too emotional, I still chased you.
I was too comfortable. I was a big shot. I was wrong.
But it doesn’t matter now, I’m moving on.
Everyone I was with, I helped.
Now that I’m with me, I can help myself.
I can love myself the way nobody ever could.
I’m no longer sinking.
I’ve plugged the vessel.
I’m carefree.
I use to be the kid that motivated.
And it’s my goal to become him again.
In the end, the small things will remind.
They remind.
In the end, everything will be fine.

I tried to grab the rose
I wanted it’s beauty
I wanted it’s petals
I wanted it’s symbolism
I realised that my flaws drew a schism
I waited for the perfect moment to pick
I came back to get it
I saw it’s stem so slick
I reached for the rose when I thought I was ready to
I reached for the rose when I thought it was the best time
I reached for the rose when I thought that it wouldn’t stab me
It has spines like a rose
I feel my blood flowing through my wounds
I feel my love flowing through my wounds
I feel my love flowing through my wounds

I feel the walls closing in
I fill with fright
I push with my might
My muscles strain tight
I push and push
I begin to feel the beads of sweat
I begin to feel the tears
There’s blood seeping out of my pores
I can’t sweat
My joints can’t be felt
There’s no use
I can’t fight the walls
I’ll let the walls take me
The squeezing kills me
I close my eyes
I feel numb
I feel numb

It’s hard to tell the people that raised you.
It’s hard to tell your friends.
It’s hard to tell anyone.
It’s hard to battle through the tears.
It’s hard to accept that your job is more important than your father’s job.
It’s hard to tell people that you’ll be fine.
It’s hard to tell your significant other that you’ll be gone for a while.
It’s hard to believe that everyone is supporting you.
It’s hard to say your final goodbye.
It’s hard to imagine leaving everything.
It’s hard to leave to take your first steps.
It’s hard to line up on the yellow footprints.

Sincerely,
Private Anonymous

I remember the first time
I remember watching you
I remember falling for you
Your innocent green eyes
Your enchanting kiss
I knew you weren’t like the other guys
You always gave me joy and bliss
Remembering how I’d wake up with you
There’s so much I still want to do
You left for something big
Something that would define you
I promised to be there in the end
I found someone else to forget you
And ended up worse
You came back
This time not for me
You never gave me a true chance
You found someone else
You sent me into a trance
You mistreat me
But I still pursue you