I feel angry
Confused
But never
AFRAID

I loved you
And you loved me too
But for all the wrong
**Reasons

you
youre the ink on my paper
that I cannot erase
no matter how hard I try
no matter how terrible you are
you
youre the scratch on my favorite record
that ****** me off
makes me cringe
everytime I’m ******* reminded
you
youre the plumber
I didn’t invite
who tried to fix the leaky faucet
but ended up flooding my home
you
youre the crooked frame
that hangs from my stained wall
youre the flannel I wear five times a week
the song I just cannot skip
the memory stitched in the scar
the wound never stitched

the addiction I couldn’t break
the band-aid I couldn’t rip off
the bad habit I couldn’t quit
the picture I could never
delete

you're always on my mind
you're always on the songs i listen to
you're there everytime i look up and see the sun shinning as bright as your eyes

you're everywhere

Never have roses
Smelled so bitter
Never has a blue jay
Had such a sad twitter

Never has the sun
Shone without light
Never have the stars
Been dull, not bright

Never has music
Been so silent
Never has a breeze
Been so violent

The world should be colorful
Every single day
But ever since you left
It is all shades of gray

I could write many words that you would never read
Empty rant words and deep flesh wounds
I could tell you stories to make you laugh or cry
But it doesn't matter cause its all a lie
I could make you feel sorry for the girl behind the screen
But it doesn't count cause there is something inbetween
I used a crow bar to pry the hearts I mended
And I counted stitches sewn by the witches
I vainly pursued more than one empty shell
But it wasn't worth it oh the stories I will tell

All it took
Was one phrase,
Three words,
Seventeen letters
To realize
She was more broken
Than I thought.

(a.m.)

I asked,
Begged,
Pleaded
For you to stop.
But the truth of the matter was
You were a train without brakes;
You couldn't be stopped
Until you ran out of tracks to guide you.
And even then,
You would go on,
Soaring recklessly until you,
Inevitably,
Crashed and burned
And lost all the wonder you once had.

And the day I realized this
Was the same day
I stopped asking,
Stopped begging,
Stopped pleading
For you to stop.

Because this was the day
I realized
That a broken, unsteady,
Out of control train like you
Stops for no one.

(a.m.)