the heat scorched holes from my skin
the flesh drips out into lumpy puddles
it is bare, it is clean
they can see right through me now
i am awake, i am defenseless
they scrutinize the desolate cavities
what they find is no surprise
partially alive with no demise

i remember how her diaphanous eyes
pierced my heart
and let the blood run dry

i remember how her delicate warmth
enraptured my body
and coated my fears

i remember how her soft voice
broke my mind
and stole away my tears

   then she forgot

i remember the blade
serrated like a key
twisting and turning
struggling to unlock my life
to set it free, to release it
to take it away
to make it go away

i remember the blood
darker than fetid tar
seeping and flowing
struggling to leave my cistern
to break free, to escape
to exit forever
to never return

   but no

I remember him
lay in his permanent bed
spoke these phrases
thought I was mad
till I saw other faces

still, I know not how
he conversed with me
but I remember
turning ‘round and seeing
one little girl staring at he

dusty apparitions arise
from unsteady tombs
prey on tender light
presage arid doom

vibrant beacons glare
from far-away abodes
speak of missing starlight
dream of once old

murmurs in the darkness
draw to my ears
threaten of a mother
for whom I’ve no fear

I trek
and I trek
and I trek

but an utter
of no discernible source
tells me to turn back
stray off course

i look behind
is that my path?
i look forward
is that my path?

did it all disappear

where is my path
did i have a path
again alone
always been alone
always had no home

why am i here

The sweetest of confectionery,
I swirl among my basin’s waves
The nectar of life’s love,
I embrace for such pain
An effluence of pure ecstasy,
I erupt to merely contain

Such haste, It pervades
The roots run deep, feel no hurt
The streams dig deeper, feel no fire
The thoughts fall deepest, feel no thing
Metallic clouds cover
a kingdom of sand

Not a chasm
Not a prison
Freedom tingles
I feel in every part,
the luxury inside

Yet it stops, I shiver
I drop,
I flop,
all is cold

I look into their eyes,
Empty holes,
speak goodbyes

No joy
None no more

All that lies of me,
is blinding foam,
dripping to the floor

the pedestal rumbles
our light quakes
the rain stumbles
our plight takes

is it gone

too far gone

dream of home
home no more

silence
silence
scream
all is well

it whispers, it pesters, it torments
     I brush, it remains
          I heave, it grows
an ache, an age
     I speak, don’t behave
          no eyes, no future
still, I hate Her