You don't know how many times I have erased the texts I wanted to send you...

"Hey!"

" Hey! Can we talk?"

"Hi, How have you been?"

" I miss you.. Do you miss me too?"

" I heard a song today. It reminded me of you.."

" I found a new place to eat. The coffee they serve is great..."

"Can we meet? I want to see you..."

"Can I call you? I just want to hear your voice...."

"I am sorry."

"I am sorry. Can we start over again?"

" We gave up too soon, too easily. I want to give us another chance."

" I feel restless. I need you.."

" I m scared. Please tell me it'll be okay..."

" I love you. Please come back..."

my body cries out for your body~
when I wake up alone
middle of the night
cold sweat; screams stifled
can't catch my breath
my body cries out for your body~
Dark, needy places; heart and soul
ache
longing for what was
could have been
my body cries out for your body~
fever rages; below, on the peaks
unsatisfied desires
unquenchable by another
my body cries out for your body~
my mind cries out for ~you~

My heart feels like
it's about to shut down
from all the truths
that only I know

People view me
as kind
selfless
heartfelt
with empathy

Yet once they witness
my darker side
this inner demon
that is always
a few steps behind me

Once they see
the ashes and smeared blood
tainted within my mind and heart

I am once again alone
alone to pick up the pieces 
of a love that never was