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1.1k · Dec 2012
In the weeds .
Micaela Dec 2012
You grow your sadness..from a seed.
sooner or later it becomes a ****, 
until you put it in a mason jar
an outstanding grow, thus far
of course it can be obscured
but the problem isit can’t be cured.
whether to rip it straight from the root
is the question at hand..
but the dispute
is..if you can?
872 · Mar 2014
acts of reason .
Micaela Mar 2014
We try so hard to wipe the filth from off of us .

from off our skin; we chafe away

but how can we, when it's always on our minds .

We all want it;

even with no emotions attached to you,

I still somehow managed to get destroyed .
701 · Aug 2011
Waste .
Micaela Aug 2011
A war, lasting over a month.

On going battle, one that would have me stumped.

a traitor, a man, a son of much treason

that war that did last for-a foolish reason .

a battle, carried on and still yet unwon

what a place to be caught in, what had he done?

betrayal of a man whom chose to switch sides.

his tactics were nothing more than his lies.


What a waste of man, wounded soldiers and all.

he tore through the bricks, ending the brawl.

it could have been halted, the ****** battle unfair.

could've been halted if only he cared.
651 · Mar 2013
Works of Water .
Micaela Mar 2013
My lack of loyalty is destined to leak through the cracks.
After a while,  they still manage to want me back.
In hindsight,  I should have caught your sadness.
For all the happiness seeps right through my fingers.
It's like water passing me by, nothing to hold on to.
Yet I'm always searching for the pail.
554 · Apr 2013
Unanticipated actions
Micaela Apr 2013
I  should have let the dogs
Bite into your awaiting
flesh.
Strip you to nothing but bare bone
I could have let them rip you
To shreds,  
mere scraps of human nothingness
Your days were numbered.
But compassion filled my heart
And my eyes.
For some reason unknown to me
I let you walk.
Spared you of any extra pain, that you
Might have .
549 · Aug 2011
Painful Colours.
Micaela Aug 2011
A different face wants me to know
Hollered from the showy snow
Sang the rain, with in her tears
Cried her eyes that showed her fears
Broken down and beaten blue
There's the treetops green for you
Sang the rain, we're much too near
Coming back it's crystal clear
The waters knee deep in his bed
We are drowning, in these sea of red.
525 · Apr 2014
inside me .
Micaela Apr 2014
The devil was inside me
Tonight, for the very first time.

I ached and cryed out for
him to let me be
I'm sure he loved every
Ounce of breaking skin
For him, still for the very first time.

Sorry father for I am weak,
Too weak to bare reality
So pains will do otherwise to soothe my wretched soul .

Sorry father for I have sinned,
My groins and arms in agony

But still I fake this half hearted grin,
**** this life I am living in . Ball my eyes and for what reason other than inebriation and unhappiness built within .
518 · Dec 2012
infectious
Micaela Dec 2012
It is flesh eating
Beneath my human corpse
With my every groan
I wander and infect
Filling my head with mindless
Soulless evil.
470 · Mar 2013
the world goes round .
Micaela Mar 2013
You left your heart in someone
who wasn't capable of loving you back .
Yet we all still play these ridiculous little games .

I'm going to stick my **** in this girl and see if she loves me.
but son The girl..

loves no one.
She's a ratted, and torn.
distraught and displaced
legs spread wide.
As big as the smile she has
on her face.

and darling girl..

the boy was broken .
broken right from the start .
He loves no one for the
first ***** was to blame
for his lost broken heart .

go ahead let's all **** each other dry .
Pulling the hate and the sadness
out of our souls .
emptying our hearts .
still we **** each other over .
and it's all a big game .
we play it over and over again
every single day .
464 · Mar 2013
just say no.
Micaela Mar 2013
Neither of us, wanted to say goodbye.
Trying to be discrete.
All we do is sob and cry.
Tears roll down our swollen eyes.
Solid as concrete.
Our words isolate us from the streets.
My dear now is not the time.

Let it not be our last goodbye.
421 · Mar 2014
making the boy smile
Micaela Mar 2014
his teeth were stained
putrid of the harsh life he endured .

so many reasons to smile
but he constantly holds back the truth .

I'm sorry it's strenuous and
tedious life, but a person can only
keep giving before their own smile
winds up half-hearted and empty

as well .
women
414 · Jul 2014
Untitled
Micaela Jul 2014
My sweet baby doll
Has been drinkin' far too much.

Gettin' lost in white sands
411 · Apr 2014
No one .
Micaela Apr 2014
Coming from a boy whom
I've never seen a face from
you can't expect me to see you,
I would not recognize you in a crowd..

nor would I look for
you in a store..

but when I saw those
eyes I realized who you were .
403 · Jul 2013
dilemma
Micaela Jul 2013
I can't sit still and let it go to waste .

Wish I knew what went through your head
When everything was said and done .

When I go back to him,
It breaks more and more

I ******* myself just to prove a point .

Now I have to weep and wallow .

Knowing you're sleeping with someone else
Every night .

But you don't care to even see, what the pain is that burdens me .
400 · Mar 2014
typical
Micaela Mar 2014
It's constant &
is fluid & rapid
I go off in a rancid tangent
.
exposing my needs of emptiness
.
I convince myself of any uncertainty
but I can't hide from false happiness
.
396 · Apr 2013
Like a child .
Micaela Apr 2013
What can I do?
I cannot hide under the covers anymore.
They will not shield my problems.
All my fears will not be contained.

Who can I turn to?
For the lady I search for
She will no longer mother me.
Once she finds out what I've become.

It's never easy, growing up.
390 · Aug 2011
What happened?
Micaela Aug 2011
Where were you when you said you would?
Where was I when I let you in?
Where were we when we said goodbye?

All in time..

Now I'm ready to cry.
378 · Apr 2014
SULTAN .
Micaela Apr 2014
Here's space;

I snort the excrement's
of your lives .

This is me taking
hold of you.

You may not feel it
tonight but I will return
at dawn.

I can't help but to gaze in your bloodshot
swollen eyes. Burdened of all fears you
hold inside.

I take away your life.
374 · Jan 2013
The word is I
Micaela Jan 2013
I use to shine.
Knowing and acting are two very different things .
I can sit here, knowing the girl sitting next to me,
is better than I will ever be .
Sitting here asking myself why I'm not more like her .
is no life I'd like to lead .

I want to shine.
but eventually, all I can do
is take my seat, and let it take the best of me .
and just let

Her Shine,
like she ought a be .
344 · Apr 2014
Untitled
Micaela Apr 2014
The lack of intimacy
that's between us . .
Is torturous for the mind ,

I lay there ,
Feeling like I've
Been poked, and
prodded .

And as mentally unstable
Young lady, I'm bursting
At the seams . .
For even the smallest
Amount of your infectious
Attention .
328 · Mar 2013
adios
Micaela Mar 2013
i would like for you to break
the way i broke that night .

i want to see you
in pain .
pain broke break broken hurt loss
316 · Jan 2013
bad news .
Micaela Jan 2013
How can I be caught in between two walls.

Both ways I turn, running into red, solid, cold, brick.

Unable to move.

How can I live with a man I love to hate.

Yet still don't want to leave .
306 · Jan 2013
still a child .
Micaela Jan 2013
How many years of your life can you
Keep questioning?

I'm drunk at a bar, and have no friends.
I have nothing. . .

But a few bucks in my pocket,
I'm tired. . .

I'm too afraid to try,
Way too tired to cry.

But  for some reason
I never want to leave .
280 · Jul 2014
Untitled
Micaela Jul 2014
For some reason,

I think I'm genuinely happy .

But I still question myself and
Who I am, who I'm becoming ?
278 · Jun 2014
Untitled
Micaela Jun 2014
To question

Whether or not

They'd even miss me

Is potentially my

Lowest point in life .
274 · Jun 2014
Untitled
Micaela Jun 2014
I'm full of sorrows .

Up to my neck .

I can't breathe it's suffocating me .

How this world full of opportunities
Can be so endlessly disappointing is
Beyond me.


It's disgusting to me that people would pay millions for more breaths, while here I sob and pray to be rid of this world.


I'm so ******* selfish .
234 · Jun 2014
Untitled
Micaela Jun 2014
Every day I think about offing myself
But what will that do .

I'll fade just as everyone else does
I come out and try and be seemingly
Normal..

but I can't .


Never was . Surely never am .

I always play around with it in my head

how should I do it .
Should I leave notes
Should I explain why
Should I do it painfully
or get right to the point ?
220 · Mar 2014
Untitled
Micaela Mar 2014
& you need comfort in the same sense I do .
I fought so hard .



but it's never turns up right .

— The End —