Some lyrics for a song that I never put to music. Freestyled this one as well so pardon the language. I don't like going back and changing my freestyles.

A quick freestyle that I did.

This poem is the third one I wrote for the Anxiety / Release collaboration. Yes, the third. And no, there was not a second. The second attempt never got finished, and thus will never get posted.

This particular piece is not my favorite, and definitely not one of the stronger ones I wrote for the collaboration. I think it is fairly obvious why it did not make the cut. Yet I am posting it. Why? Well, I want to give you an idea as to what I went through as I contemplated, ruminated and struggled with as the process went on. This poem is dark, and I remember that I was in a fairly dense fog (mentally, not physically) as I wrote it. But I can't help but feel that there is something missing, something incomplete with this piece. I can't put my finger on it. I did edit this piece a bit long after the actual writing date, and it did make it better than the original.

Once again, I ask that, at the very least, you can appreciate what it takes to write this dark poetry. It is not just random words, it is a thought process that starts as a tiny idea, and with a heavy heart and foggy mind, that idea grows into something....scary.

Feedback is always welcome.

This is the 4th piece I wrote for the Anxiety collaboration. It is the darkest of them all. This one shows the progression, or rather, the regression of my mindset as I wrote. My mindset was dark, darker and darkest, and then went back up. I believe the poems I wrote reflect that. If you've read the previous two pieces I wrote for the collaboration, I think you will see it as well.

After I wrote this piece, I knew right away that it would not make the cut. It never had a chance to be the final submission to the artist. But I kept it, as it is part of the journey. If I recall correctly, it was this piece that convinced me I did not want to go really dark for my final piece. And so, this poem taught me a lot...about myself, about my poetry, and about what I wanted to contribute to Nicky's collaboration set.

Once again I urge you to not read too much into the words in relation to myself. I do not feel the emotion as written. But please do read the words knowing that somewhere, somebody feels this. The emotion is real. Maybe we can't relate. But that doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

Rod E. Kok
March 2014

Here is the 5th poem I wrote for the Anxiety / Release collaboration. It is dark, but I don't feel it as dark as #4. There are some really cool ideas in this piece, and I remember being fairly happy with it. The only thing I don't like is that it seems to end very abruptly. But it is finished...I have nothing more to offer this particular piece.

Rod E. Kok
March 2014

This is the 6th piece I wrote for the Anxiety / Release collaboration. When I wrote this, I thought it had a very strong chance at being my submission. I personally think this was the most powerful piece I wrote up to this point for the collaboration. I was (and am) very pleased with some of the imagery I came up with. I think my favorite line is 'You're not helping'. That line says so much to me, I still get shivers when I read it.

I hope you are enjoying this journey through darkness with me, as I guide you down a path of poems that are focused on Anxiety. I have received very little feedback (which is fine), so I am not sure how this series is being looked at. Nevertheless, dear reader, please read the work, even if you don't want to interact with me on it. Please understand the sweat, the tears and the raw emotion that is plugged into each piece. It truly is exhausting. As always, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to read my work.

Rod E. Kok
April 2014