I might be a stranger and I was called that…
I might be a freak, and I was called that…
I might be abnormal, and I was called that…

All over those years, I was collecting labels to my  collection! and nothing new!

I was searching all those years to relax, for peace and for meaning in every breath I’m taking from this life!

According to Human’s terms and law….
I fall in love….
I got married….
I had children…
I got divorced…

And I was still searching…..Then….

I found her… and all terms and laws changed!

everything…
Turned upside down…
Chaos became the theme…
Logic became the stranger in my world…



Even when I lose, I win….
I lost my centre… I win my heart!
I lost my sense… I win my meaning!
I lost my logic…. I win the purpose!
I am broken…. But I was reborn…

                            Here I am….
Not Sad….
With my new skin and heart!
Ready for the unexpected failure and win are the same for me! I will learn from each opportunity they will bring to me.
On Alert of that moment to…..
                              Leap!

Sitting next to her, watching falling a sleep...
I didn't look at anything except the loose strand of her hair...
I didn't notice anything except that loose strand of her covering her eye!...
I saw how her eye so tired and wants to rest...
I can't tolerate sitting next to her!
I sat on the sand looking at the sea, in that dark night!
10 minutes....
Me, the sea, the moon, the wind and she still sleeping on that rock!
looking at her again, how she leaning toward her knees and laying her head! and Sleeping like a child!
I kept chatting with the Sea! What else!
What should I do!
I feel the whole world inside me and I can't give her anything except the friendship that I promised her...
She Knows i'm lying! And I know she knows i'm lying!
                              The question that I can't find any answer to it!
I love her.... The Hell Yes I do!
The sound of waves asking me with anger, are you serious!
My answer, is there something else i'm going to lose!
                                      You are Hurt!
I'll be more hurt if I waste this feeling...
                                       You are Lost!
Divine with me...
                                        You will be in silent!
But I'm fully alive...
                                         You will be alone!
But I'm in love...
                                        Why can't you see!

Because she still sleeping...
I saw the child inside her that I'm missing! and all that...
                                       While she is sleeping!

I thought something died!
I thought my heart went in a coma!
I thought my skin are frozen!
I thought my feelings were in control!
                   I don't know what happened...
Should I go for the internal process and disappear?
Should I tell her I fail whenever things are around her?
Should I go literally for a coma in my feelings and emotions and **** the spirit inside me!
                      All that for the sake of the.....
                            Funny love! :)

I'm lost with and without you!
And I'm asking myself..... what about me!
The Hell became my Castle!
Devils are my chatters!
The funny that they will be lost as well...
What is more funniest...
They will still be chatters with me in the...
                                           The wonder! :)

This is how I feel the music with gentle melody and sad tone…
It let me go into deep thinking inside my the lost soul and crazy world…
I don’t write my poems so i would be labeled a poet…
I just want to smell the breath I’m taking inside me…
I just want to taste the water that dancing inside me...
I just wanted to retrieve what has been taken from me all those year...
                                       I wanted to...
                                      Love in Peace!

She told me your hands doesn’t look belong to you!…
I know…
What else does belong to me?
When I said my Heart wants to leave my chest, Nobody believed me…
When I said papers are running from my pen, they thought I’m a poet! They thought it is  figure of speech!
When I said I saw the tree is waving for me asking me to join the forest, they thought I’m emotional…
                                They didn’t….
Felt the Pain…
Felt the Loss…
Felt the anguish…
Felt the Death within me…

I have..
The babyface…
The sad eyes…
The shaken voice…

                                 I don’t have..
The Peace…
The Safe…
The Love…

But…

I promised myself to let everything go…Even my…
Hands!

She said "I have a hard time writing about how I feel"!...
I saw her smile like a crystal dew in misty river!
Like a pat on a shoulder to let you smile from your heart!...
Even her name spreads the peace in the realm of my words...
I don't know her!
I didn't talk to her before!
                    But....
I felt the eagerness in every Word she wrote!
I felt the happiness in her Wow and wonders!
I felt the peace she holds in her soul!
Although I don't know her!
                    But....
She is ......  
                   How I feel!....