I've been trying to talk
to my heart,
lately
not in a "listen to your heart" BS
kind of way

but like
we're almost friends,
pals,
someone I sort of know, who knows not
that
I'm always afraid

sometimes I sit
on my bed,
in the sheets,
and I listen to the naked
words of everything
my heart might want
to say to me
and I try
to start a conver-
sation-
"hey, whatcha up to? Is there something that I
need to know? Why don't you listen to me? Can you not
hear me like
I cannot hear you?"

that there's nothing,
or there's me,
maybe it's just me.

I want to know the secrets
of
knowing when your
soul is talking
and knowing when you're
full of **** and hoping for
an answer just
like me.

I don’t understand can’t comprehend
Just feeling alone,
disconnected again
Stuck with tears in all but my third eye
Chaffing these feelings up against this pen,
Can’t seem to move or bend without the break
I don’t understand a pain that doesn’t ache
To heal is to reopen and pass thru with love
Our wound aren’t the only evidence of abuse
Physical proof often separates the elders from our youth
Stuck between choosing alcohol or self abuse
Go in search of a sweeter way to rot your tooth
Chase away the fear, and the anger
I can't handle this section of your chapter
Where you just want to avoid all the love, and the laughter

As you glide your hands across my naked body
you leave behind the mark of the beast.
We let lust get the best of us so easily

because with every stroke comes so much power
and moaning that continues to get a little bit louder.

So as your fingers continue to dance across my skin
My temperature rises in the name of

sin.

I don't know who I am,
I don't know what I am,
I don't know what to do,
I don't know what to be,
All I know is,
When you left you took something with you,
Something that made me feel like I knew things,
Something that allowed certainty to flow through my veins,
You took something,
And now I don't know what it was.

I picture something broken
With something beautiful growing out of it
I don't know what's to come
Or what's to be
Or how to take it
But I know that I'll accept it
If its fated I expect that
No matter what it is
Its a part of who I'll be
I try to keep my strength
And my faith that I can make it
And even if I lose
Not lose the better part of me
I picture something broken
With something beautiful growing out of it

We live in cycles
Led by psychos
We suffer silently

I can hear
The mocking edge
Of your excessively
polite words
Well
I think I can.