Like stained glass,
She was breathtakingly beautiful
But easily broken

Silent now the television
Silent now the telephone
Silently I sit here,
Silent and alone.

I’m not sure why the poems
Are much harder now to write
Not sure why the sleep
Comes harder every night
Not sure if all the trials in life
Are harder now to take
I’m not sure that when the morning comes
That I will even wake.

If I was asked to take a risk
Not sure that I would dare
I’m not sure if I was dying
Anyone would care
Not sure that Heaven waits for me
Behind the pure white Pearly Gate
If I asked for fifteen minutes more
Not sure the Reaper-man would wait.

I’m not sure if my mistakes in life
Outweigh any good
Not even sure that honestly
I’ve done the best I could
Not sure when folks remember me
If they will grimace, or they’ll grin
Not sure official scorekeepers
Would vote my life a win.

Not sure if I have lived before
Not sure if there’s a second chance
Not even sure with lessons
I could learn to dance this dance
The world makes me dizzy
The carousel spins too fast.
Not sure my horse could win the derby
The brass ring might have already passed.
But I'm not sure.

Silently I sit here.

PwL 6/16/15

After awhile those quotes on
Google Pinterest or Tumblr
Don't matter
You've read them all
You've felt them all

After awhile you can't find those quotes on
Instagram or more tumblr
Not anymore
You feel wasted inside
You feel like nothings left

After awhile you can't find music
Pandora Itunes or Spotify
That's it
No more music to fit your body of water
No more music to sink your anchor into

As more time goes by you can't find that show
Youtube Netflix TV
That's all
Nothing to fuel you to smile or laugh
Nothing more to talk about or look forward to

As the trees sway eventually your meds stop working
Pills Drugs Alcohol
Taking more
The clouds begin to wake you up at night
The moon decides to scream into your being cold... blank

I am afraid of giving you my heart.
If there is one thing I will detest myself for being, it is vulnerable.
I can't stand giving someone the power to destroy me. I will avoid that at all costs, which is maybe why I can't love you.

I don't trust you. I love you, but I can't trust you with something as fragile and dangerous as my heart.
And the sad thing is, I don't think I ever will. Your heart is wild and open and is home to many people.
Mine is just for you.
And if one day you leave, then it will be a big hole of nothingness.
Empty.

And I can't let that happen to myself.