I seen **** in the negative
Told me to loosen up and write all my positives

When I was done
It was gone

You were the world
You were my heart

Build a spaceship together
. . . Takeoff

Who knew time
Would come quick

Take you
****** you

Seems unreal still
My mind everything but still  

You seen potential
I seen more in you

Doubted myself
But never doubted you

A masterpiece
A beautiful piece
Exquisite piece

I need Peace
My wild thoughts
are silent

Silence played its part
In the empty rooms you no longer hold a part of

You told me you had me
Told me not to think so much
You left me to think sooo (****) much
****

I had you
Felt like you never had me
The way you should have had me

I knew mine:
Diamond piece
Beautiful piece
Wild
Exquisite Piece

That it is easily missed until there ain’t no one to treat you
(The way I did)
Its like a song on replay
But I let you listen to my unreleased

Yet you released
As if you didn’t know
The gem I held

II
The gem slipped through the folds
the tab began

Atmosphere held:

Good vibration
Raw Energy

Whereas
Vibes are temporary
While Energy is an everlasting Spark

Never dulls
But sharpens
Darkens
Ignites

Let it burn

Who ever knew that the ⚡️ Spark
Lost all its electricity current

Tell yourself lies to help you survive
Assume let it take over your mind

You build a suit so did I
Landed on the same planet
Different Levels
You can only imagine

Through all this I hope you didn’t forget about
The Spaceship
It became unfunctional
(Throughout time)

Find me intertwined with my favorite tunes and you adding a piece that I never knew existed until now

Let it:

Flow
Break down
Excite you whole
Take over your mind
Get lost in the depths of loving yourself

The beauty in all things
For the reason it goes
Drives me
Experience discomfort
Let it bring out everything from the chaotic
Let the reflection of self remind you that you are Rare
That you can go to the unexpected anywheres
Escape from it and come with: fresh and new
That you may add to your growth that within yourself
You love every given piece seen and unseen
that you learn to rest your mind and seek what's on hold

Why do you feel so weak
asking you that question I know ruptures something inside of you mentally
Control the sound
Mute everything, anything negative that distorts
You in ways you feel bothered
That every second that goes by your heart races the same melody of it all

Let it be exposed
Let the light shine in the darkest places
Let it grow on its own
Let it be natural
Let it be beautiful
Let it hold value
Let it not steal your mind nor time--
Nakedness is everything it's pure and true
I love the essence
I love what makes you wild when it comes from your heart
I love when it's alive and free
I love it when you begin to flow
In ways it has to be said because
The firsts of everything in anything that you do make me love you more
I feel the rush excitement that you get
I feel the volume of your joy elevate 
It's the most high
It's You

Uncomfortable
causing or feeling slight pain or physical discomfort.

Comfort sometimes isn’t healthy or safe

I made myself
Erase any trace
That lead back
To the pieces  that was suppose to piece itself
Without me

In order to find Peace with my mind
So my wild thoughts can become silent
And so my unreleased is released to you

Understand this wasn’t easy
I had to for My sake

So this is my closure

This is 2014 “I want to be Happy“ part II
And Now I’m seeking everlasting joy
That energy not vibe

I want genuine
I want that Gold
I want everything
That I deserve but never got

Give me Loyalty not Love

(For I am)
A masterpiece
Beautiful piece
Diamond Piece
Wild
Exquisite Piece

Few words
Were never enough for me
But I managed some how

To tell you what
I love most about  You  and your  flaws
That you seem to care about

I love you for  You,

I wish you understood

For every me piece of me
Loves every bit of You

                                                                      **♥

T** he
O pen wounds
R emembering
N ever to let you in again

Say something
Let me know
Because
The Silence is
*Roaring

the stars were a blur
as I looked for the Moon

It never looked so beautiful

within the search I’ve felt bliss and beyond that I’ve felt a bit blue because although I’ve seen the Moon I’ve missed you more

There's too much to say
In a short amount of time
And she loses her words
And too much to say
Ends up too few
Because she gets nervous
And the butterfly wings
Are fragile
And her heart
Feels so to

She grew into the most Beautiful
and she can't be found

I loved you in ways I thought loving you was right
I gave you everything
I loved you for you
& you, filled with euphoria began to see the world much differently
You never stopped searching

You’re so beautiful and your lips are to be kissed
and your body is for you to love
but first you must love yourself
and I gave you everything because you never asked
I fell in love with not only you
I fell in love with it
It was Joy

and you understood, for you I love

this shall past of the seasons
the leaves will continue to fall every fall
and the sun would always be the sun
and you are changing with the madness mentally
as the chaos continues, it eats deep
leaving you naked with only the truth
of what you hold
the reasons why you grasp
isn't measure for words that exist only in the mind
only for you to be left with confusion and frustration
the seasons will past the world ages
and you have to learn to let go
for the best version of yourself in the near future  

I
Make
Lists
Of
Things
&
I
Lose
Myself
Within

Her eyes wander
And
They begin to tear
Each drop
Slithering unto her pillow
As she wipes them away
More come
And she can't help but
Cry

The flowers began to die
They would change color
They would curl
And suddenly they all died

And I am sick mentally
Hoping I will get better soon

I stopped walking in where the flowers were
Because I would break down
And I would water them
With my tears
And I knew I couldn't go back there
It's just too depressing
& yet I haven't cleaned it
Because I'm not ready to let go
Hoping that someday
Someone will walk in that room
And pick me up every time I fall
While we clear up the room

We'll replant new flowers
& watch them grow
Into something so Beautiful
So breathtaking

The  ☼  will come out                                        
And so will the  ☽
And the day after that
And so forth
Just know that
I love you
Every second
The ☽ &  ☼ are out

The images were made to stand out
The poetry was made to be read aloud
The wine was to be sipped on, slowly
and You my dear, you were to listen
to the details of everything said
everything painted
because you were the reason for her
madness bliss

within the pages
There the art hung
There the words were placed so beautifully
The ideas were &BYOND;
The gaze into your eyes mattered the most
The connection within the words and images
Were by nature
Where it mostly started
The reason why I kept going
because the madness bliss.

The Madness bliss . . .
—It was Everything!—

T** he night was silent & you stole my
H eart with every thought
I had of you,
E very piece of me
F ell apart within

Build you everyday
Most battles are inside your head
Don’t let your mind confine you
Defeat your demons
When you feeling weak
That’s when you are your strongest
Pain is temporary
Every scar
For every story of its own
Losing some
To gaining plenty
Trust your intuition
Remember that
You were made to win
You were made to conquer

Life has four different seasons
And my favorite is Autumn
Because I love the leaves turn different colors.
I love when the leaves run across the street
while the wind screams.
Life has a meaning some don't understand
And people try to find its meaning.
Life is a beautiful thing and I see that when
Autumn comes along.
The cool breeze,
Gets to the little hairs on your arm
While you wearing a sweater
And your teeth start to clap
As you exhale you see your fog in front of your eyes.
You see. . .
Life is beautiful and I found beauty
That it brings to the world
And as Spring comes along
I smile because daffodils & roses
Start to grow with all the other flowers
And I smile because there are so beautiful
You see. . .
Life is Beautiful.
Just look at the positive things
And you'll see.

We'll:
Kiss
Caress
Talk to
each other

You'll:
Hold me close

And
I'll just like you
More each time

         * .   .   .
We're just friends
Because that's what we both want
And part of me is okay with that

               * .     .
But what do I do when
I think about You
Throughout the day & night
But what do I do when
I get jealous

I know I shouldn't get jealous
Because your not mine
But .  .  .
never mind

                  * .
At the end of the day
I have to remind
Myself we're nothing
But  
*Friends

Forever a  Poet  and  You
will just be another story
I will write about

I’m no ordinary artist
I love to get ***** simultaneously being creative for an ear to listen and an eye to see

I feel lost
But this time
Its different

I don't where I am
I don't know how I got here
I forgot what's this place is called
It looks familiar. . .
I know the name
Its on the top of my tongue
Let me think. . . .

I gather all my thoughts
& yet I can't put it
Together

I ask someone
"How do I get home?"
He only looked at me
And he vanished
by the second

I begin talking to myself
And suddenly
I start to hear my voice
Inside of my head

I'm I going insane?

I no longer can hear my voice
Only inside of my head
As
If I were muted

I began to scream

And I fell down to the ground
Because
My head hurt so bad
Then I realized that my scream
Makes me weak

After I got up
I heard something tell me that
When it starts to get dark
You'll start to feel
Something inside of you
Eat you alive

Right then the sun
Starting going down &
I started running

I began to feel it
Eating me alive
I began to scream.
And I fell down
I was weak

As I was on the ground
I heard somebody
laugh
I never heard such an
Evil laugh

I got up
And I kept running
And running

I felt something push me
On the ground
And I couldn't get up

I started to cry

I heard the evil
laugh again

Only seconds until
it gets FULLY DARK

And I picked myself up
As I started to run again

Something tripped me

And I start to feel weak
Again
Because I was screaming
My tears started to blind me

And

I began to feel someone
Touch me on my arm
But I couldn't see who it
was. . . .

That's when I


Woke up

I think about you
I worry about you
And every time we disconnect
It worries me
To the point it
Starts to feed,
Eating me alive
Because I always imagine the worse
Because how can you look up to the sky
When there isn't one for you to look at
Days, Weeks, even years
Will pass
*And the sky will
Never be the same
Without you

I want a bottle of wine
To wash away the hurt &
Drown myself in,
Cry myself to sleep &
Damp my pillow with
Tears

Numb the pain,
Because it seems like the only choice
I have
Numb every little negative thing,
I feel within

& the thought of feeling
Everything all at once
When you wake up
The next morning
It's an excruciating
Pain
I never want to feel
Ever Again

So many times I forgave you, I
Opened the door over and over again
Realizing and
Remembering
You always had something back to   say

Letting you in
Once more would create this
Void, &
Everything you said I fell for,
Don't ever think I'm  weak  because I became  strong

When I begin thinking
About the
Nights we will talk about our
Desire to travel
Everywhere, just wanting to
Relax with you and I,
Longing for
Us to be
Something again when
T**he right time comes, so we can begin our journey

Say
Everything, let it all out
Can you feel it eating you alive
Remember
Eventually
They'll all be revealed
Someday

For the moments I have spend with you
I cherish
Within the repetition
I'll continue to say it until
it soaks in 
It might even get tiresome
I just want you to feel
everything
as of the deep breaths you take
when you seem to look up
and breathe in because
life seems great at the moment
because all it is really
is being with someone that gives you that spark
that always seem to drag to make fire
throughout our darkest nights
You remind me that I can do anything if I go for it
You're my every wind that creates the water to move
to create such beautiful waves
You truly are special 
You are my Sun as I'm your Moon --Always--

E** ventually
M y heart broke into
P ieces;
T he pain was excruciating, I couldn't blame
Y ou , I blamed myself

Because sometimes all we need is an explanation for these waves

because sometimes all we need is that breeze to make us understand patience

because as the wind causes the waves in between there's patience for the biggest waves 
yet to come

as life has it's positive side,
that not all waves are sad 
but built with euphoria for what's to come

He gave her everything
& she didn't
Understand why
Then he left because
He knew she deserved better

Things for God always come
I n the
M oments that's right, just wait & be patient
E verything will be put in its place, the way God planned it

Feeling things just got worse
Ready to explode;
Everything that she kept bottled up inside
Eventually came out

They say the things
You do in the dark
Will eventually
Come to the light

But what happens
To the things
That doesn’t come to
The light?

Does it eat you
Inside knowing you have
Something hidden;
Maybe a dark secret
Or
Maybe something
Out of this world?
Do you think about it?
Do you wish you could
Just let it all out?

*Some things are better off hidden

Everything will begin
To change
And you'll  *remain the same

For
eveRy piece of me
gAve up on
everythinG
I* ever thought
couLd
b*E

Open your mind
I want to see the  beauty
You always seem to talk about,
It fascinates every part of me
It wakes me
It shakes me
To think were different
**But somehow alike

I was going to be the girl
Who likes to paint her nails,
Wear eyeliner & wear lipstick

My art is like a story that never ends;
My art is living, my mind is creative.

Chaos within the eyes
the silent cries
the "maybe's" and "what if's"
the long contemplation set in the mind
with the thought of the things most loved
its feeling mentally stuck
and wanting a elation feel to burn your face
That with a bit of blue there is more than 
sadness
its the chaos in between the seconds of
the waves crashing together
its the feeling one feels
when inspiration enters the mind
and relaxes your body

Late at night I'll watch the sky
& I wonder to myself

*How did I ever make it this far

"I miss you"

The sad
Reminder leaving
Us to
Think that it's okay to
H**old on and pretend everything is fine when its not

As she speaks her voice cracks
It shakes
As her lips begin to move
In such ways she never imagined
She spoke truth
She fell in love with herself

What hurts more,
The times where the pieces placed themselves
Or
The times where the pieces were nowhere to be found  
?

Look at the beauty
In everything
And open your mind