trying to find my way through the darkness has been a wild crazy adventure & it has left me heartless.
it has left me vulnerable,
it has left me weak,
it has left me broken,
i can barely speak.
lost,
open,
shattered heart.
it has left me searching,
hoping,
falling apart.
it has left me.

the closer i get to a realization of
what the connection between male and female truly is,
the more i understand my actions toward you
then and even now, as i speak.
we may never understand each other,
we may never get to share an experience
with mutual level of love & lust...
although sometimes i hope we still can.
-
i just hate to feel like its that "Pinky" girl..
the one with trust issues
and revenge adding fuel
to her fire of insecurities
that she thinks can only be cured
if she's emotionally attached to someone who loves her body,
or someone who loves the idea
of how neatly her ****** slips
onto his ego without brushing against it
hard enough to provoke what he's insecure about.
-
just thought id actually share the part of me
that still screams for you even after trying to destroy her.

when you’re lost in the wind,
i own the words to soothe your soul.
keep your diamonds,
i am worth far much more than gold.
inner peace, especially
you’ll find when you get near me
your fears alleviate.
you’ll see the unseen.
my aura is of essence,
my destiny derived
from the bloodline of creation.
i am creator,
in disguise.
you see the linger in my eyes.
you see all that you’ve been deprived.
i am the truth.
i see fulfillment in my youth.
simple blessings,
i am simply blessed.
when i am lagging i just catch my breath.
a certain healing in the wind,
a certain power from within.
a flower from the earth,
a flame you can’t put out.
more power to the earth,
reveal all you are about.
a soul with depth of oceans,
light energy waves in motion.
so calm,
silent devotion,
a dose of magic potion.

light figure,
bright figure,
lurking in the dark.
i see you in the bushes.
i see you making a mark.
-
ill stand and stare,
for awhile.
i can not make out a form.
but im not getting any closer,
im not going any farther.

hidden in plain sight
are the stories of my life
all of the pieces that i write
they speak
so sharply
like a knife.
yet
the ones so close
they lack the trait of understanding.
i’m more oblivious
to all that is surrounding,
i’m always giving
but the favor hasn’t found me.
it goes so deep,
a single broken piece,
profoundly.

guilt trips & misfits
throwing fits & doing splits in mid air.
we bipolar, multifaceted, got many faces
& too much purpose over here.
we clear spaces & land
to farm energy &
demand form to form new specie.
=
like grasshoppers at your neck,
long jump over correction;
respect me for exactly who i am.

we base the worth of a human being on status & net worth.
we forget that all of this **** is MANMADE.  
blind to a higher meaning,
disregard a higher being.
we place lost souls
on pedestals,
they never teach us anything valuable.
we worship material.
we lurk behind screens,
never seeing behind the scenes.
yet we see what’s unreal
and we start to feel
inferior.
give too much credit to who’s equal,
make them feel like they’re superior.
world of illusions,
& that is my conclusion.
we don’t believe that
we can win the war,
so we are losing.
we don’t need to chase wealth,
we need a movement.
we need unity,
togetherness,
you & me.
reconditioning the minds,
they are so closed,
let’s set them free.

the sorrows of the world are heavy.
we are burdened by so much that its scary.
                                
all we need is love,
love is all we need.
if we all believe in love,
love will make us believe.

love ***** shoes
like ***** men
with shady moves
who play pretend;
too deep within to comprehend so "who's next?"
-
for potential lover,
im not searching...
im attracting.

inhale,
exhale,
watch my problems float away..
no more stressing,
no more problems in the way.
i fly nightly,
i am grounded by the day.
i don’t medicate,
i meditate.

as my thoughts race,
and my mind wanders.
will i ever find peace?
why do i always make a stranger of the people i meet?

i wish you were a poem,
one i could write my way out of.
chained up in your words,
how do i break free of your love?
will i ever find myself or will i stay lost in all you've made me.
boy i was heaven in your hell,
i was everything you needed to be.

mr. distant lover, why you stray so far away?
left me here at war with all the things you failed to say.
i don't need your love.
but, my love you needed me;
you needed me to need you,
you needed someone to see the world through.

i'm feeling so alone & i'm wondering what will it take,
for me to feel at home in this space i cant escape.
why am i still lost in all that you have made me?
you turned my heaven into hell.
i'm here with no one to save me.
                             i will get up & i will find my way.
                             down in your love is where i cannot stay.
                            its my time to rise,
                              like the sun that shines my way.
                           down for your love is where i cannot stay.
it is your love that keeps me so far away.

i disavow my allegiance to the flag,
& to the Commonwealth of the Bahamas.
for we are not one people,
we are not united,
we do not live in love,
& we are unfortunately serviced.

what does the future hold for my Bahama land?
with our resources not being utilized for the betterment of our people...
but being sold to non-Bahama land.
no profits being aimed to,
or sources being owned by
our Bahama man.

as i lift my head to the rising of the sun in this Bahama land,
i see no hope for the future, no hope in my Bahama land.
no one to speak up,
the youth are out of luck.
the elders show no interest,
we are doomed.
still,
we march on to the glory..
but what bright banners do we have to wave high?
the means of the leaders are of no significance,
& i can no longer bear the pain that i witness.
how will we excel
if we do not love,
& unite?
going forward,
will we stand together
for a common, loftier goal?
as i lift up my head to the rising sun in my Bahama land;
i see anguish,
i see fear &
leaders with no care.
all the things i see are broad.
...but may the road that my people trod
lead us to our God,
that will help us on this march to save our Bahama land.

anyone lost can find home in her eyes.
she is comfort and warmth in disguise.
she is beauty and truth behind all lies.
she shines bright like the stars in the sky.

take me back to the space where i could 'poet' to infinity,
not scrambling for the most complex
or most context;
so i can express gratitude toward my innocence,
ask that version of me to stay naive
and to stay without question,
resting sure that all is as it must be.