Fragile illusion
I hang off the cliff
Of my dream
For a solid ground
But sea is everywhere I see
And it didn't leave its storms
Up to me
And the beautify and terror of it
Separated only by
The faint line of my vitality
And it's eternal unstable
Massive permanence
Tomorrow I will crave
For direction
Today
I am but a speck
Carried by the
Waves
Feeling their briny kisses
On the surface of my
Scared skin
Unless I chose to tear my eyes
Away from the blue
And dive
Towards the darkness
Of it all

In between the Milky Way and the black holes
Of the universe inside of this ever expanding mind
Growing only to see itself ever smaller
Humbled truth feels the most
Adoring
The fragile perfection of sparkles inside the morning dew
And the mind flows in all directions and thoughts
So random but in this infinite state
Logic is only a string you use to control the
Beads of experience and sometimes it helps
And in other times you get a glimpse
Of something unfathomably familiar
And you know that no matter how much Blessings you gathered in life
Without a contact it left an empty space
Or was it there since before the beginning
What DO I know in fact that cancels the
Clarity of the feeling that through a sideways
Glimpse I captured a snapshot of home
In the strangest of places
All this rumbiling cacophony of worlds
Yet again fails to explain
The absence of logic in something
That is beyond logic for it is
The meaning
And despite it all
Life goes on
You play your part
The way you must
The way you feel
And you still know so little
Feeling the truth on the periphery

I hate the uneducated and the ignorant.
I hate the pompous and the phony.
I hate the jealous, the resentful.
The crabbed and mean and petty.
I hate all ordinary and dull little people
who  aren't ashamed of being dull and little.
I hate the New People
with their cars
and their money
and their T.V.s
and their stupid vulgarities
and their stupid crawling imitations.

I love honesty and freedom and giving.
I love making, I love doing.
I love being to the full.
I love everything that is not sitting
and watching
and copying
and dead at heart.

Did I forget to be your therapist?
Perhaps after I get that check
In my mail
I will apologize
Profusely

To inhale and release
Or to excercise and be an adult
Maybe to write the list of chores
So I can pretend I am an adult
While rebelling against it
Maybe inhale and go to gym
Oh... but then I'll be tied in knots
From sweaty dudes looking at me
It makes me angry
Worse off when they start talking to me
Why do they get me so angry?
Why did that narcissistic *** gay colleague of mine
**** me off so much - I know that beach is competitive
But I thought our cause should make us a little
Bigger than weighing ourselves on the scale of
Who is the most popular
I used to think highly of him
Now I got a little war going on
And there is even something satisfying about it
My other colleague stupidly aligned with
The gay ***** so I showed her a little dramma
You know - a heartbroken kind of drama
Oh she felt so bad, following me all doggy eyed
**** her she deserved it
I was actually kind to her
Now she feels like ****
Because she's been bullied most of her youth
And it's hard to flip from victim into an *******
Many things make me angry
Thinking about getting angry makes me angry
I shall inhale
Goodbye

Rare moment
Found myself
At a loss of words
That angry outbursting
Satan anarchy heavy metal
Type of kid always a trouble
Spreading red paint all over the place
Like someone got killed
Many time in a raw
Burst into a story of abuse
And then to my astonishment
"I love you"
Then went red from shame
I felt so sorry for him
I wished I could say something encouraging
But I think I failed
I just stood there somewhere close
And continued talking to him
As I felt his shame and anger
And **** did I feel like I failed!
At least he didn't leave