Crossed fingers couldn't bring you back
I know because I've tried.
Neither could these tears I've shed
I know because I've cried.
It was two weeks ago I fell asleep
While you played with my hair.
I didn't see this coming
I guess I must have missed the flare.
God saw that you were hurting
He could tell that you were weak.
Your life lived says it all
You didn't have to speak.
An angel came to guide you home
In its arms you were embraced.
Taking you to be with Grandpa
The angel walked you through those gates.
You held on for so long
But that fighting turned into a battle.
The cancer was the only horse
You never got to saddle.
I admire all your efforts
You're the strongest person I ever knew.
I'll love you still forever
And I know you loved me too.
I always hugged you twice as hard
I didn't want to let you go.
I remember when it made you cry
That somehow helped me grow.
I learned a tighter hug can comfort
And sometimes mean much more.
I think I finally realize
What I love yous are truly for.
I learned not to take this life for granted
Or the ones you love.
Because at any given moment
We could die and rise above.
Know this isn't goodbye forever
I'll see you again someday.
Give Grandpa a kiss on the cheek for me
In my heart's where you will stay.

Funny how the mind works
When it is we snooze
Diving into dreams
Splashing crazy loose

Trouble behind us
There'll be trouble ahead
Don't let the worries
Be all that is fed

Open up to enlightenment
Brush the cobwebs aside
Don't answer the door to your nightmares
Focus clearly with your minds eye

Tomorrow isn't cast in stone
Yesterdays sun has set
You can't enjoy the moments between
While dwelling on regret

So what you fill your mind with
In your daily dreams
Can make all the difference in the world
In how you wake and how you sleep

I should probably box away your things
And burn the photos and my ring
But I'm having trouble determining

If this is really real.

I should probably delete your number too
So I don't find myself calling you
I've found I'm not sure what to do

Is this really real?

After your words are said and it's done
And your feelings have set along with the Sun
I'll step back from the battle you've clearly won

Wow, I guess it's real.

Please don't come back at your dismay
You don't get to choose when I leave and stay
This is your doing this was your way

One day YOU'LL wish it wasn't real.

Need somewhere to hang your head?
Let me tie the knot in your noose.
Having trouble trying to decide?
Well here, let me help you choose.

I'm tired of saving people.
The go to shoulder for their tears.
This isn't a new occurring trend.
It's been happening for years.

He said but you've been wasting time, potential's rare and hard to find.
If what you're looking for is peace of mind.

Then do something with yourself.

She said but I have no place to be, and I'm still figuring out this person who's me.
Can't tell you how many times I've been on my knees.

Do you think I'm going to hell?

He said a woman like you is not bound for flames.
Stop making excuses stop playing your games.
You are what you do your names just a name.

The world isn't going to wait for you.

She said but there's so many options and ways I could go.
What if I choose wrong, how will I know? I've been dissecting the past finding new ways to grow.

I'm not really sure of what I want to do.

He said so do nothing does that make you feel better?
When it rains do you cry making everything wetter?
Or are you the sunshine to the worlds ill weather?

You're thinking too far ahead.

She said do you know how many red flags I've missed?
The ungrateful sets of lips I've kissed.
And the funerals I won't even begin to list.  

Everyone leaves or is dead.

He said so I guess I'm no one we're not really talking.
You're here, but off in your head gone walking.
You've hardened your heart and there's no point in gawking.

You're the one pushing everyone away.

She said so there's few left okay I get it.
And maybe you're right I should probably quit it.
I'm blessed and grateful for some I'll admit it.

I'll stop hitting the button that says replay.

He whistles round the corner
it's that time of day.
The nine to five has ended
and now it's time to play.
His lunchbox in his pickup truck
had been equipped with more then food.
The liquor store was the next stop
but not the fix for his mood.

Come six o clock he's made it home
and had a chance to eat.
By eat I mean drink his ***
finally kicks back his feet.
Day three without a shower
because there's no one to impress.
Half the time wearing yesterdays clothes
forgetting to undress.

By seven he's watching Wheel of Fortune
screaming slurs at the TV.
Never guessing puzzles right
and finding need to disagree.
His phones been off the hook for days
beeping in the distance.
Come Jeopardy the urge is strong
with more and more persistence.

He grabs the bag of goodies
holds it in his hand.
Getting excited by just the feel
of the syringe and rubber band.
He's sweating now profusely
anxious with desire.
With nothing left to lose (but life)
again he plays with fire.

“Gypsy,” he whispered swinging a knife at her throat.
But she bundled him in a blanket,  patience and hope.
He was painting their faces to hide all their beauty.
So she was leading her cubs like it was her duty.
He was singing the song of a desperate man’s tongue.
She was flipping her mane in the dawn’s early sun.
He was a memory trashed through the lens of a camera.
She had done what she wished but not how she planned ta’.
Grits in a bowl like miniature maggots.
Freeing her mind behind the puff of a ******.
A favorite place but that place has no door.
He was putting his way on the green of a *****.
Till he learns that he's road **** plucked at by the crow.
The child that is, but just doesn’t grow.