Whenever you should cry
I will be your window to the sky
to remind you each time
that every rain pour is followed by the sun's shine.

I know you'll never do the same for me
because you know I already see
but it doesn't hurt any less
when you pretend not to notice my distress.

You tell me a joke and you make me smile
but this tactic of yours can only last for a while
it may help in the moment but does not make it better
and I realise that I am forever alone in this stormy weather.

How can I think I'm not interested when my heart betrays me
by flying when you catch my eye?
    (my cowardice keeps me away)
You exhaust me but I can't resist your pull.
    (fear? keeps me timid, not my nature)
I want you to drift away but I can't seem to let go.
    (my body is a traitor)
I never dreamed of you 'til you stopped speaking to me.
    (i don't even know what to want)

2009

I remember.
I remember the good.
I remember the bad.
I remember who was there.
And I remember I was sad.
Life wasn't meant to be.
The voice in my head said to me.
But, something small was still there.
And complications became aware.
You have no right.
You have no purpose.
I screamed and screamed.
Until I learned this:
You have a home,
You have your loved ones,
You have a right.
You know longer need the wrong.
You can do this.
You are strong.
Here today.
Gone the next.
Goodbye,
To those who don’t deserve this.
I have been lost.
But today, I was found.
You will know longer,
Hold me down.
I am here,
And this me.
So come and see.
Because I am me.
I have a name
I have a purpose.
I have a game.
I can win,
Or I can lose,
This is up to me to choose.
You are not me.
You do not know.
For I have so much more to show.
It is true,
I am not you.
I will never be you.
And I will never need you.
I am me.
I am found.
I picked myself up.
While you held me down.
I am strong now.
And you are weak.
How does it feel ?
How does that feel?
To be where I once stood.
To know my feelings,
To know my pain.
To know you never took the blame!
Where were you?
How could you leave?
Why did you not stay?
The answer I will not have
Nor will I care.
Because no longer
Am I down there.
I am here,
And here I will stay.
This is where I belong.
This is my way.
Not yours.
Not his.
Not anyone’s but mine.
For I am me.
Me, is I.

If you knew the way I thought about you, I think you would blush.

I think for a moment you would stare at me in wonder and think to yourself
"what?! how do you of all people think that way about me?"

If you knew what I were thinking about you, I think you would be kinda speechless.

That for a few minutes you wouldn't know what to say or what to do you would just sit there like a rock; cause I think if you knew the way I thought about you, your whole world would change, not for the rest of us just you inside your head.

Maybe you would decide to smile more,
or maybe you would choose to open the windows as you drove down the street; because what I think of you isn't really that important,
but what you believe about yourself is more important.

so for a moment if I could get you to hear my thoughts about you,
if for a moment you could crawl into my head
and see what I see, you would be proud of yourself; you would be amazed at yourself; and you would probably laugh a little too.

you see if you could know what I think about you,
you really wouldn't have to wonder about me anymore;
cause you would know my heart.

If I could play my mind out like a song or a recording;
first, I think people would be offended, but I know you wouldn't because
I know you would keep that recording because you feel the same way.
So really you know the way I think about you, because you think that way about me.

I’m from the normal neighborhood,
You’ve got those strange neighbors, who visit you from time to time,
Their names were Fear and Death.

You’ve got those good friends, who live just around the corner,
Their names were Ecstasy and Wonder.

And you’ve got that one best friend, who lives at the other end of town,
His name was Insanity.


I’m from the Future, but also the Past,
Never the Present,
A sliver of time so thin, no being could ever grasp it,
And no nonbeing could ever create or destroy it.


I’m from somewhere I have never traveled.
A place my eyes have never witnessed,
A place only my mind has ever reached.

If you want to go there, too,
Just close your eyes and wait,
Don’t even wait,
Just let it slowly drift in and settle down.

When it does, you won’t even realize,
Just know you will be overwhelmed with joy,
And you won’t even care if Tomorrow begins without you.


I’m from “If you’re wrong, admit it,
If you’re right, shut up.”


I’m from shadows by moonlight,
From fire by love.


And nothing’s gonna change my world, cause
I’m from Across the Universe.

Mom,
I keep wondering how long you’ll keep loving me.
Sure, you’ll always keep loving me with words
But I wonder, will you love me in action when I’m
No longer your pretty girl?
Will you still love me when the lover I bring home
Has smooth curves and red lips and soft skin like mine?
Will you still love me when I’m the groom, she’s the bride,
When she wears the dress and I'm in the tie?
Will you still love me when your family starts to stare?
When I’m with her will you still dare to take me out and
Pin me up like I’m your trophy to share?
I know, Mom, I know you will always love me with words,
But when your love is inactive, "I love you" starts to hurt.

I keep wondering how long you’ll keep loving this “pretty girl,”
Instead of the girl that is blatantly standing, and staring,
Right in front of you.