calamity and noise
polute my calm poise
distraced by the confused solute
of try-it-again rhythms

The threads between us
multiply
and strengthen our connection
with every word.

My girlfriend was so pretty
And normal as could be
But then something horrible happened
And changed her entirely

One day she was sipping coffee
A spider fell into her cup
It was too late when she gagged
And realized she had swallowed the spider up

The next morning when she woke up
And scratched her sleepy head
She discovered that overnight she had grown
Eight spider legs and a giant spider head

She screamed as she crawled out the door
And shrieked when she looked into the mirror
Her spider senses tickled and twitched
And made my poor girlfriend quiver

Her life has never been the same
Being half a spider and half a lady
At first I wasn't sure I could continue dating her
I mean, just imagine starting a family and having a spider baby!

Sometimes I think and wonder
What to do with our lives
Normal is seeing your girlfriend shopping
Not chilling upside down from the ceiling watching Desperate Housewives

Sometimes its quite funny
To see her browsing at a store
Where she’d usually buy a pair of shoes
Now she’d have to buy three pairs more

When I couldn’t take her shopping
And tried to run off with the guys
She spun her spiderweb and caught me
And took me by surprise

I’m so sick of her spider antics
I really wish we were done
At first she was a lot of nice things
But now my spider girlfriend is no longer fun

I took her out to dinner
And the only thing she ate
Was a plate of fried houseflies
And a glass of lemonade

When I tried to hug her
Her eight legs wrapped me tight
They gave me such a shock
Eight legs were such a hideous sight!

I couldn't take it anymore
I broke it off with her and made her understand
But now I really regret my thoughtless decision
Because now my girlfriend is dating Spiderman.

"                        "
      !            :                  ,                .
              ,            ,            ,                .
      ,              ;                              !
                    ,

Please tell everyone your name, grade,
And what instrument you play.
We’re just going to go over some basics.
You can have a break in ten minutes.
Band, ten, HUT!
HUT!
Come to set!
Attention!
I said come to set!
Heels together, toes apart.
Check your posture!
Guide to your left!
No, your other left!
Your steps are too big.
No, now your steps are too small.
You have to stay at set for three minutes;
If anyone moves, we start again.
Restart the time!
Restart again!
Get your feet in time, freshmen!
Section leaders, I need to see you.  Now.
Your water break is still ten minutes away.
Drum majors, go get more batteries for the met.
First competition guys, good luck!
I don’t care if it’s late, we need to learn the drill.
Someone go run and turn on the field lights!
You’ll thank me later.
First football game, good luck!
Drumline, did I say you could put your instruments down?
Trumpets, get your horns up!  To the press box!
You’ll get it, don’t give up!
Last competition guys, congrats!
Give it your all and don’t look back!
Guard, don’t **** anybody with your flags.
GUARD!
Last football game, congrats!
Somebody please let the bass drums through!
Everybody give me your plumes!
Do NOT set your uniform on the ground!
I expect all of you back next year.
Thank you for giving me your best.
I apologize for when I was at my worst.
I love you guys.

I hurt just the same
More or less
Still, there’s no rest
And these pages scribbled
Adorned with ink blots
-every other word
And there’s very little punctuation.
---
Scratched a line that was a lie,

Another removed, for it said too much.
Should be simple to understand
Really;
I hurt just the same.