The sadness
Was a black pool
Of a haunting tragedy.

The sadness
Is a suicide
Of a lonely man.

The sadness
Is the gripping of bed sheets
And the clenching of teeth through crying eyes.

The sadness
Are the lonely nights alone
And the agony of vulnerability.

The sadness
Is a contagious disease
A promise of eternal melancholy.

The sadness
Are the sleepless nights
Of empty wishing on dead stars

The sadness
It was an overwhelming emotion
Like a cannibal
Tearing my flesh off my bones
A delicacy of the highest honor.

The sadness
Was a jump from a skyscraper
A slit on the wrist
An overdose off pills.

A merciless dance of death.

I once went to a land of sorrow and pain,
I was despised and judged.
But you don't have to be something you ain't,
For when you do, you truly are, misjudged.

Cheer up and be glad,
for what you have, you shouldn't be sad,
Take my hand and laugh with me,
we'll be a happy family

Screaming children crying hungry
as black tar coats this land
I cut myself to use my ink
for I mean to jot all this down

Eyeless people smash their heads against jagged stonework
I sit on a dead dog to write what I witness down
all is lost as we are up **** creek
hope it's not down to me or those poems
those ones written with venom vehemently
those poems to commit suicide to

Planes are falling out of the sky like apple blossom
and our machines have turned on us
we were once the masters
now just slaving *******
one chap just asked me for a gun
so I gave him one in his pain ridden face

Never disturb someone when they are writing
I write that down as he slumps to the floor
the music of discretion is dead
and suicide our liberation  


By Christos Andreas Kourtis aka NeonSolaris

How dare you think you have the power to take your own life.
You are loved,
you are worth it.

If I turned around and walked away, would you notice I'm gone,
Would you even care?
When you look at me, do you see the smile on my face,
Or do you see the tears I fight to hold inside?
Do you see a strong, willful woman I portray,
Or the scared little girl who never quite goes away?
If I broke down and lost all control,
Would you know how to handle me,
Would you hold me 'til I stop shaking,
Kiss away all of my tears?
Would you know how to lift me up
From a place far below recognition?
You see a ****, loving woman,
But I'm so much more.
I'm sad,
I'm lonely,
I'm unpredictable,
I'm broken,
I'm irrational,
I'm complicated.
You say you want me,
But you don't even know.
You see who I let you see,
Who I've always let you see,
But what about the real me,
The everyday me,
The girl who never seems to get anything right
The one who could break down at any given moment
And have no clue why.
I try so hard to fight away my doubts
For a while, they bury themselves away,
So far away that I think they're gone forever,
But I guess nothing lasts forever,
Because the pain and tears always find their way back to me.
Can you handle me,
Can you handle ALL of me?
Am I worth the time,
Do you really love me enough
To stand by me through all my troubles,
Or am I just too broken for you?

Exterior wounds heal and leave behind their mark. You can often have them fixed, but not what is on a persons heart. Wounds that are emotional, do take time to heal, but the scars that are left behind, will never disappear. When a dream of true love is shattered, because that person doesn't love you. When a child is lost to a parent, this is a grievous wound. When you offer up everything just to have your life torn apart. These wounds cut deeply into a persons heart. So though some may wear a battle scar with dignity and pride. The scars that we have inside of us are the ones that can make us cry. These are the hardest ones to deal with, the scars you cannot see.