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a ridiculed soul deemed
worthless
trapped by society's
undefeated cruelty
vile memory repressed
still lingers in his throat
the tittering grows
louder
as his laughter echoes
uncontrollably, resentful
and frightened
desiring only but one
semblance of normality
but humanity has
crumbled
how could this world
be so ruthless to someone
who they have denied
to Youー
a man born from chaos
carmen Sep 27
sunbeams fall across my face
as I recall such regretted haste
of statically-charged, crystal ****, lightning shimmer
ice cold switchblade gleams in blue television glitter
raising hell in my white nightgown, I drive fast
drinking ***, I'm not afraid to crash
Elvis in the mirror, Marilyn in the bed
fire shall consume me? well, devour me it has
for my soul is set ablaze when I dream of what I had
your pulse sends me lightyears away as I think
of all the times you brought me to my knees
prison calls from mid-July still ring out in my ears
the longer that you stay away, the more you feed my fears
cigarettes burning, neon palm trees, bikini ******
Jesus pleads with me to no avail, "don't go further,"
but I am God now and I crave your touch, daddy
though you're gone forever, sadly
******'s gone and snatched you away
forevermore my skies will be grey

stop haunting my dreams
please let me be
your spirit still holds me hostage
and while you remain to be
the only one on Earth for me
what I can't have will **** me
surely
i keep dreaming of u and each dream is more vivid than the last
please come back, daddy, ur tha only one for me
Are you okay, you ask
and I say that I am
though I haven’t been “okay” for years

I can’t decide what’s worse:
how okay I am not,
or that you looked into my eyes
and believed I was telling the truth

I can’t cry for help
as I fall into the abyss
so I cannot expect you to save me
but here I am anyway
hoping you might catch me

You don’t
and I find rock bottom,
let the darkness encase me
I cannot blame you, this is on me

If I had leapt a little further
perhaps I could have caught myself
but it is too late now
carmen Apr 3
I was there
the day they died;
don’t think K's mama
had time to cry.
You don’t know
the things I’ve seen;
You’d be surprised
to know I still dream

of Sarasota
and fists that gleam,
blue fifties queen
still waiting to glow.
John Dillinger,
my one true King,
and then there’s you,
my Savior.

cold corridor,
*** treasure trove;
where you are
is where I wanna go.
hold me close,
Daddy, don’t let go.
I’m terrified,
my time is close.

Heaven is
on Earth with you.
the ocean shimmers
nostalgic blue.
Jesus pleads with me,
"slow down the car,"
but I am God now
and my mind is far.

kaleidoscopes
glitter in my eyes.
Daddy don’t you fret
over my starry sighs.
bruised from your love,
so nectar sweet I could cry;
I swear I’ve been dead
until now.
i thought u saved me, but i still feel numb
carmen Mar 26
i can feel you in my kiss
salivating between my hips
crying out, "please take me home,"
i don't wanna be here, boy,
leave me alone

flakes of skin left under my nails
broken vessels from your hell
"promise you it'll be quick,
won't be too long now"
you make me sick

how can you call yourself a man?
my reputation doesn't mean that you can
i can taste your blood in my teeth
"piggy" scratched deep with my keys

shattered glass from waylie's metal pipe
scattered 'cross your car like stars tonight
paint drips down like blood from my thighs
you don't get to wink at me and lie

tried to hold my hand on the drive back
kiss my shotgun, daddy,
you like that?
ripping through my castle walls
***** stains and wrappers coat the hall

you'll get what's yours in due time
God never forgets to give me what's mine
made me feel like it was my fault
thought i could trust you,
but you stole it all away

i'll return the favor someday
no amount of sleeping around excuses u holding me hostage and ****** me
sleep well, dear, god never forgets
Your words
birth butterflies
in my stomach
But my anxiety
is pesticide
Ek Feb 21
My new shoes
Lean into the concrete
Lines and drags
Out mud from frowns

I smear this ink
Into walls as paint
And I breathe their
Smoke alive

This stain on
My cheek will remain in
Chic for life
Just like

She said
Don’t tease
I rummaged out
A knife and choked

This newfound guilt
This group parade of filth
I drowned in
One second ago
carmen Feb 5
there is something I have never talked about;
a consummation you'd **** me for,
if you found out.
lying there with bleach blonde hair,
cold ******* gaze;
He told me He loved me in the sweetest ways.

chandelier glows soft with frozen rays
as Pretty Boy gets lost inside my crystal bouquet.
I just perch there staring down at Daddy-Babe
as He whispers heavy all the ways
He'll make me pray.

waves come in and touch my toes
as I purr into his pillow and make it known
that Babydoll's not going anywhere;
His infectious affection's got me hooked like a drug,
crying softly in his neck as he groans.
I am the closest thing to Heaven He has ever known.

all the promises He makes and keeps
lead me to believe His heart is pure
and He deserves the best of me.
of all the men I've come to love,
He's the vision of God I've been waiting for.
for Him
Melissa Schirmer Nov 2018
chug coffee like a caffeinated punch to your nervous system,
music too loud to sleep.

smash the cement and level the buildings,
boots too heavy to hit the ground lightly.

silence chauvinists with your *******,
anger too tangible to be ignored.

drop out, drop bombs, wear red lipstick,
moments too few to waste.
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