I've seen the field where I laid myself down to bleed
My hands dripping from the blood pooling out of my mouth
I've held my hand as I leaped off the branch of the cedar tree in my yard
and twisted my ankle yet too afraid to tell my mother
I remember knowing I had to stop but egging myself on to keep going
A bad influence to even my own conscious mind
I am drifting through these times with a passenger that predicts my every move
And I follow the lead and hold the box of matches

Stop
Tearing me apart
Only to ask why I can't
Put myself back together

Happiness is a mission and everyone is engaged
Obsessed with getting their piece of this "golden age"
But then there are others who sit inside when it rains
Because dancing isn't always the way to **** your pain

We can't all just smile when we're happy
Some hold in the joy to make it last a little more
Knowing expectations are to be flawlessly satisfied
Even when you are shaken to your core

"Don't conform" and individuality is a trend that doesn't mix
With those who aren't grinning ear to ear
True emotion is shunned and devalued
In this world where it's too cliche to care

Hey Darling,
Do you know where I set my pills?
I need some chemical help.
I know I said I love you,
but how can I love you
if I can only think of myself.

Don't blame me, my love,
it's my cells beginning to die.
Call my mother, my father, my sister, my brother.
I'm sure there's still time to cry.

Oh, it has to be this way my love.
No happy day could make this better.
My God chose no other fate.
I know it's hard to recover
from losing your mother;
I'd wish you not carry that weight

Now look at me, honey,
can you see the pain in my eyes?
Burning coals of desperation,
all part of my last aspiration
to finally lay down and die.

Please just know that I loved you,
but my dead heart will never keep you well.
So please move onto some other,
and you'll know that I suffered,
but at least I'm not burning in Hell.

I send a smile into the world and it's all for you

I laugh at a joke until I cry and it's all for you

I kiss those soft delicious lips and it's all for you

I make a fool of myself to see a grin and it's all for you

I take off my clothes and let go of my dignity and it's all for you

I let this fire burn me to ash and it's all for you

I jump off this cliff and break my neck and it's all for you

I feel frozen inside like winter and it's all for you

I turn into the monster underneath children's beds and it's all for you

I become the same nightmare that keeps me awake at night and it's all for you

I rip off my skin and bleed out what's left of who I was and it's all for you

Now you're gone

I don't know who I am anymore and it was all for you