A huge part of me wants to be involved in this nationwide gun control topic,
but there's another that doesn't want to participate.
Partly because I'm afraid I'm not educated on the subject enough and maybe I feel this way because I'm an empathetic and emotional person who hates violence of any kind and that blinds me from something I don't know about.
But, those that have the opposite opinion are probably just as educated as me, if not less
and everyone's voice and thoughts matter.
But.
It's just so touchy and there's no way to talk with a gun loving hick from Ohio who thinks he needs that gun to protect himself from the Government...
Although I think he's forgetting that if the Gov. wanted him dead, he would be without even seeing it coming.
Duh.
So.
As you might see, I'm conflicted as **** and feel that everyone is selfish and will never agree and that nothing will ever change.
I think it hurts me so much because I love my country, my home, but it feels like this isn't the place I grew up admiring anymore.
Children and innocent people will continue to die in large quantities and that's just what life in America is like.

The world is full of
           Inequality

No matter where you look
No matter what they say
The world is full of
           Inequality

It’s said that fire can destroy anything
           if it burns hot enough
           if it burns long enough
even if that anything is as tenacious as steel
because steel melts
and it can be bent to my will

I am fire
I will burn
I can bend the world to my will

The world that’s full of Inequality

Because I am a woman
Because I am resilient
And no one will tell me otherwise.

For years
I’ve kept it down.

It’s a
         pillow over mouth
         blanket over head
         Duct-tape and Gags
sort of feeling

Because I’m ok
    (they have to think im ok)
    (i dont know why but they have to)

It’s been
               Building
               Boiling
               Burning

               music in my ears
               words at my fingers
               Ties and Shackles

I have to be ok
    (if i tell myself that it has to be true)
    (i dont know why but i have to)

Really I’m Fine

then she told me
        - Maybe you should talk to someone?
        - I mean maybe... Ill be fine tho
        - Trust me, thats what I thought too
           but I did, and you kno the story better than anyone
        - If I find time then I guess so
        - Yus! I’m glad. Itll be goooood for you

Too bad my schedule’s full.

It’s fine
I’m fine
    (this hasnt been enough of a problem)
    (its been ok up until now)
    (this has always been there though)

why do I feel like this though?
              What do you guys talk about in that chat?
              Why do you like me? I’m a *****...
              Haha it’s not stupid! Why don’t you like it?
              *******!
              I make myself laugh more than I do others.
              Is this normal?
              HA!! Oh sorry...
              I’m a very self-aware person, self-reflective. It’s hard to explain...
             What? Is that stupid?
             Haha... yeah...
             im sad

I feel weird...
Why do I feel weird?
    (it isnt good. whats wrong? somethings wrong)
am I normal?
can someone help?
What am i doing wrong? whats wrong...
    (its not ok)
           im sad