you can call them my veins
well, I consider them vines
when you look for what grows it is you that you'll find
my blood vessels are ships, and they sail the blood sea
carrying cargo called 'words' from your mouth to me
and my bones are the homes of each memory
they ache when you leave
but they are calm when you breathe
my skin is the sky
scars being stars
I've created this world, dear
but it's not mine
it's ours

You have no idea
How much your
Casual inconsistency
Messes with
My heart.

Cause I feel like ****
When you point it out
And I tried my best

It's like you want perfection
And I'm very sorry
I'm the opposite

Then you get mad
We ignore each other
After our fight

But really who's fault is it
I'm shaking
While you want everything

being with you has taken everything out of me
i feel as if my soul has been capsized into the abyss that is you
swallowing me whole
leaving nothing left for myself to enjoy
my body trembles at the thought of you
first a contentment feeling of warmth
now shards splintering into my bones and heart leaving scars the size
        of windows--
windows that you have escaped from; leaving the pain stinging just a little bit more
there is a gaping hole in my chest
and your winds are blowing straight through
leaving nothing but pieces of you for my bare and broken hands to hold on to

Disown.
You throw the word around,
like you understand it -
like you truly think you are the one
who has been disowned.
My life has been unimportant,
           I have been neglected,
deemed not good enough.
Why is it that you resent me
when I was the one disowned
by you,
           my father -  someone who is supposed to love me,
   but instead
left me.

I'm picking up pieces of something
that doesn’t exist.

So don’t dare
let the word ‘disown’ slip out of your mouth,
unless you are apologizing
for what you’ve done
to me.

It's ironic really
That I can never write my feelings down, until I'm crying so hard I can't see the paper and my hand trembles worse than my fathers body during withdrawals
After many years of wasted water I finally realized taking three showers a day wouldn't wash this depression from my skin. They say things will get better with time but I think the arms on my clock have Alzheimer's because they keep moving backwards and it seems to be a perfect representation of my life. I once found out that my boyfriend watched **** and I forgave him but I didn't realize every time a movie was on I would imagine his eyes glued to the actresses naked body....  I wanted to be that naked body. It's insane what insecurities can do to a person. I think my father failed to tell me I was beautiful because I didn't warm his soul like the ******* did but I swear I could have if I had the chance. But my chances left at the same time he did and lately I've concluded that I need to stop blaming myself for him leaving. I need to stop blaming myself for not being that naked body in the pictures. I've realized that no amount of warmth and comfort can stop me from crying tears that I should have cried years ago and opening umbrellas inside isn't going to shield me from the amount of rain this world brings. Dream catchers won't catch my bad dreams anymore-I'm just too old. Or maybe I've never been old enough. I lost my innocence at the age of 5 when my mother told me my father was in jail. I lost it again at age 15 when I didn't object to a grown man stripping me of my dignity and virginity, because I wanted to be a beautiful naked body. And now I am that naked body, wasting water by taking 3 showers a day because I need to wash this depression off my skin, I've got to get it out of my skin.