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Ellie Dec 2014
Wednesdays and Fridays:
The only days I jump out of bed
Filled with
happiness.
Passion.
Patience.
Excitement.
I walk into the classroom,
Trade my sadness for a dose of jubilance.
I feel alive again.

A dozen 3 year olds swarm the room,
the melting ***.
Labels such as: typical, Downs syndrome, autistic, deaf
Come together to morph into a magical classroom.
“The Tree House Room”.
Differences are not feared in the eyes of these little humans,
They are
embraced.
Accepted.
Loved.

These are the days I live for.
  Dec 2014 Ellie
Devin Blazejowski
Body shaking
Heart racing
Mind scattered
Feeling dizzy
Need help
Can't talk
Go away
Can't walk
Pass out
Why not cry a little too

Hello my name is anxiety
Ellie Dec 2014
Was I *****?
Maybe I wanted it?
That intoxicated girl,
She must have said yes.
But that girl was me.
I did not say yes.

Was I *****?
only a vague memory of the night
But the morning, a vivid reality.
Waking up naked in my bed,
To a strange man walking out my door.
Thanking me for sleeping with him.
But I did not say yes.

Was I *****?
He seemed like a nice guy.
Maybe I fell on the walk home.
That's why there was blood and bruises,
On the most intimate parts of my body.
He did take me back to my room.
But I did not say yes.

Was I *****?
The memories will forever haunt me.
But months of hell and healing,
Have led me to realize:
I did not say yes.

I was *****.

— The End —