When asked what my favourite name is
my answer will always be the same
yet it will always be different
because my answer to the question will always be
the name of the one that I love.

I know it won't mean much to you
And you won't admit that the love I once felt was true
But I never gave up trying
Even though I knew each day my heart would still keep dying
For my heart you see should never be thawed
But it was for you, no matter how flawed
Each day though it seems
You'll keep chasing her among other dreams
Some will be wrong
But others belong
I just hope you'll see
You shouldn't love her
Because she'll never love you as much as me...

Simply loss of words
Smiling slightly as i'm writing this poem
Actually thinking of the smiles
Crying sometimes as if i don't know him
My hands shaking as vulnerable drops of tears trailing....
Trailing down the rugged path of my hand
The very hand by which i held his hand
Pools of tears forming at the base of my eyes....
Why???? why can't you get it???!!
You are never dead to me
Maybe our fights, maybe our lies...
But never our trust....
Your smile makes my heart free
Death is not the cold hands i felt near your grave
Death is that when i wrap my arms around me
And suddenly feel i am alone
And you are not there with me
Please come back from death
I beg u, my heart can bear no more
Your silence makes me shiver
Your words weren't harsh, there were no trace of violence
Maybe it was me...
Please reply to me
Those flowers were not roses, those were tulips
I guess it was the white noise, not the music..
Are you really gone...
Are you?
I have been rummaging my head
Thinking of ways to
Bring you back from the dead

You can keep my heart
It's already broken
So I no longer have any need for it.

Drowning (Lyrics)
Water’s getting deeper
But I can’t seem to stay afloat
And I just keep dragging myself down
Cause I don’t want the ocean
I don’t want the ocean to keep her

[Chorus]
If I could save you I would
Even if I drown beneath the waves
Now if I could save you I should
But right now I’m the one that needs to be
Saved

We’re both drifting endlessly
We’ll go wherever the water takes us
And I don’t know if I’ve lost my way
And now you’re gone
And I don’t know what to say
But…

[Chorus]

I’m the one that needs to be saved x3
Now no matter where we go
I’m the one that needs to be saved
Wherever the water will flow
I’m the one that needs to be saved

I’m drowning, I’m helpless
But there’s no time to be scared
I’m drowning, I’m helpless
You’re the only one that’s ever cared
I’m drowning, I’m helpless
Still searching the ocean for you
You’re drowning, you’re helpless
And someday the world will be too

Sometimes I get a bit on the darkside.
A'ight, so what?
I would keep to myself (but for you,
Beautiful reader/sacred deceiver).

When you find solace in words
it's 'cause they found something in you;
It's all about experiencing the view.

If my life were a recipe
I feel like every ingredient would be followed
by the word "optional".

8 hours of sleep (optional)
Two to three meals a day (optional)
1 social life (optional)
1 job (optional)
A handful of friends (optional)
A pinch of creativity (optional)
One cup of laughter (optional)
Three heaped tablespoons of positivity (optional)

You get the idea.

But you're different.
You're the one ingredient I can't do without.
You're the one thing that matters
when I can't be bothered with the rest of it.
When all the chopping and sautéing and boiling
and grilling of everyday life
seems like too much hassle,
there's always enough time for you.
You're my quick-fix meal on a weekday evening.
You're a mid-morning snack
snatched between errands.
A quiet evening in on a Saturday
with a bottle of wine and Joni Mitchell playing
"I could drink a case of you".
I could cook you every night.
You're comfort food at its finest
unpretentious, convenient.
Never bland and never tiresome.
You're the one ingredient I'll always have in stock,
that one I'll never let myself run out of.
Because you cannot be substituted.
You, and only you, are not optional.

Without you
there'd be no reason to write this song
without you
I'm not quite sure where I'd belong
without you
I'm incomplete
but I know someday
we'll finally meet

[Chorus]
And I don't know
but I don't mind
we're just another story
lost in time
and I don't know
if I'm still fine
but when I'm with you
life's sublime

if I never see you
will you know just how it feels
and if I never hear you
will I know if you're even real

[Chorus]

But now you're not here
and I don't know why
so I'm kind of lonely
because its just me
not you and I

[Chorus]

But for now your there
and I'm still here
dreaming of times
when you were near
and now I don't know
but my minds still mine
knowing someday
we'll be just fine.

January is ice cold, but it never snows.
You're always so angry but you never want to talk about it.
February it starts to get warm, then there's a week of snow days.
Just when I think you're letting me in you shut me out again.
March has cold mornings and hot afternoons; the trees start to turn green.
You call me at 3am crying and you're fine in the morning; you have good days sometimes.
April is hot and cold and wet and dry.
You've never been a very stable person.
May is rain. The humidity makes my clothes damp.
You get so broken sometimes that it breaks me, too.
June is perfect lake weather. The water is cold.
I want to know all of the dark corners of your mind.
July has no rain. The dirt dries out and cracks.
I wonder how many of your smiles are faked.
August is too hot to go outside. The lake is bath water.
As soon as you get close to someone you find an excuse to leave.
September has cool evenings. The mosquitoes are awful.
Sometimes you feel at peace with your demons.
October is more rain; autumn oranges and reds and yellows.
You say you're dying and I try to convince you it will get better soon.
November is a dry cold.
I wish you would let me help you.
December freezes the plants; the leaves are gone from the trees.
*You destroy yourself and wonder why you're so broken.