You’re so beautiful when you’re praying
I have a memory of me laying
On your chest on a blanket
In a field of grass
Your eyes are closing
And I feel you throwing
Down what’s in your hands
And replacing it with me
Your brow furrows
And I remember burrowing
Into the fabric
Of your flannel shirt
You’re saying “amen”
And there’s pain then
Because the prayer is over
And I have to look away

e.s.

My lust, my thirst,
Day by day happen to increase,
But the truth is it darling,
That my life till date has been cease (d)

How can I get it across to you delicately that I want you to do all the ***** things to me you never told anyone, not even your Tumblr?
People say “respect your body”
I respect my body. That’s why I’m asking you to destroy it.
I can beg.
Use me to feel like a man.
You can have me any way you want.
Don’t be gentle.
Scratch me and bite me and make me scream
Bruise me and leave marks on my body.
I’ll do anything you want me to do.
Then when you’re done, you can kiss every part of me I let you destroy, put a t-shirt on my body, tuck me in, and sing me a lullaby.

Punk lips in perpetual paralysis,
and they're too afraid to let them kiss.
Too afraid to try to let it last
because of the blurs in their past.

I think the kids are in trouble.
Hanging out with temporary people;
making the wrong times never stop.
Smoking dreams with glass lovers
to indie sonnets and neon power pop.

The world knows they can pretend,
and it's their hearts they can't defend
from the illusion of what they could be,
and the loneliness of what they'll never see.

They skate the pavement until the sun sits,
and drink ***** from water bottles until their hurt slurs.
It's the preparation of tomorrow and what it may not bring
that makes every moment before, everything.

They're scared because it's real,
and I'm scared because they're scared.

I don't know if this is an appropriate time to say that I miss you what-with all that's going on, but I do. that, and I just wanna stay inside on my sofa all day and curl up into you with movies on regardless of whether or not they're being watched. I wanna eat various foods that may or may not be terrible for our bodies but taste wonderful. I wanna spill **** all over the place and rush to clean it up before my parents notice. i want to look out the windows and notice how small we really are in this monstrous universe, but to me, you're the whole thing. I want to forget that I crave destructive things and replace them with you. I want to breathe your air and inhale the scent - cigarettes and stardust - that I know belongs only to you. I want to sit on the sofa all day with you and stop trying to explain that I love you, and start trying to show you.

e.s.s.

"when your little girl
asks you if she’s pretty
your heart will drop like a wineglass
on the hardwood floor
part of you will want to say
of course you are, don’t ever question it
and the other part
the part that is clawing at
you
will want to grab her by her shoulders
look straight into the wells of
her eyes until they echo back to you
and say
you do not have to be if you don’t want to
it is not your job
both will feel right
one will feel better
she will only understand the first
when she wants to cut her hair off
or wear her brother’s clothes
you will feel the words in your
mouth like marbles
you do not have to be pretty if you don’t want to
it is not your job"