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Jan 2021 · 3.9k
I Apologize to Myself
David Paddit Jan 2021
I apologize to myself for holding myself
     back even though I know what Iโ€™m truly capable of
I apologize to myself for making
     myself cry at night
I apologize to myself for
     treating my body like a
     dumpsite for garbage instead
     of a temple highly regarded
I apologize to myself for making
     myself smaller so that others can feel bigger
I apologize to myself for choosing to see
     whatโ€™s lacking in me and not
     celebrating everything I have that makes  
     me beautifully me
I apologize to myself for speaking harsh words like:
     ๐˜ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถโ€™๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ถ๐˜จ๐˜ญ๐˜บ
     ๐˜ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถโ€™๐˜ญ๐˜ญ ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ๐˜ท๐˜ฆ๐˜ณ ๐˜ฎ๐˜ข๐˜ฌ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ช๐˜ต
     ๐˜ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถโ€™๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ข ๐˜ง๐˜ข๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ถ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ
But choose to tell other people:
     ๐˜ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถโ€™๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ถ๐˜ฏ๐˜ช๐˜ฒ๐˜ถ๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜บ ๐˜ฃ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ถ๐˜ต๐˜ช๐˜ง๐˜ถ๐˜ญ
     ๐˜ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถโ€™๐˜ญ๐˜ญ ๐˜ฎ๐˜ข๐˜ฌ๐˜ฆ ๐˜ช๐˜ต
     ๐˜ ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ณ ๐˜ง๐˜ข๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ถ๐˜ณ๐˜ฆ๐˜ด ๐˜ฅ๐˜ฐ๐˜ฏ'๐˜ต ๐˜ฅ๐˜ฆ๐˜ง๐˜ช๐˜ฏ๐˜ฆ ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ
           because you of all people
           know how itโ€™s like to be the villain in
           your own story and donโ€™t want
           others to feel the same.
Oh, to wish well for
     others and not wish on
     my own stars first. . .
I apologize to myself for giving love to others
     but not give that same love back to myself.

                                      -- I will accept my apologies and forgive
                                          myself so that I may learn
                                          how to love myself properly
Jan 2021 · 623
In-Betweens
David Paddit Jan 2021
Life is measured by the small, slow moments that take up most of our day; it's found in the banality we take for granted in the everyday . . .

The in-between feeling of waking up and falling asleep in the morning
The walks in between two places
The savoring of meals in the middle of the day
The comforting silence shared between people before long dialogue
The car rides en route your destination . . .

Is it not in the process of leaves falling that you are totally entranced?
Is it not in the stillness of the world when you begin the relish life?
Is it not when your feet walk to a song's beat when you most feel alive?
Is it not in the process of cooking your favorite meal that intensifies your hunger?

Between day and night is when life is most lived. So live out your best life and enjoy the in-betweens because once you reach the end, your journey is over.

— The End —