All these years, I wore a mask that was suited to other people's validity. I tried to ask for their acceptance to feel significant until it made me suffocated. Losing myself and emptiness felt in the depths of my heart. There's a hole that could never be filled by others. Behind this mask was my true self until I realized that I didn't need to hide anymore. I didn't need to cover myself from the world because love had found me.

The love I have for myself filled the hole inside my heart, exposing the true tenderness and goodness of the soul. My precious soul despite scars and imperfections, I know that I was beautiful. This love I have for myself surpasses all of the doubt and insecurities, uncovering the mask I have worn for so long, and embracing my uniqueness. This love nurtures my existence to be the best version. This love will keep me living.

That girl sitting there
is a beautiful tragedy
her mind is an aghast
her body
is her grave
her bones
ache
while her throat is being strangled
whats wrong with her mind
cant ever be untangled.
she,
is a beautiful tragedy

I carved her name upon the dawn
So every morning might be with her
But as it rose It grew too bright
And closed my eyes
Yet still I saw her there

I carved her name upon the sky
To keep her near me every day
But nightfall came and cleared the light
And all was dark
Yet still I saw her there

I carved her name upon the moon
To stare at her throughout my nights
But tired eyes are sneaky foes
And sleep prevailed
Yet still I saw her there

I carved her name upon my soul
Love not just with me when I look
But every day and every night
And in my heart
Yet still I saw her there

tried- yeah, yeah,
what an idiot,
what hubris,
but if you knew
the weather-or-not-Gods

like I do, dat true,
we are closer than
next door neighbors,
we are kinda
married

first thing that embraces me
daily, like a lover more human
than you reader!

them gods are more emotional
than your average teenager,
one day you’re kissed from
head to toes, twice, up ‘n down,
plus reversd revered direction,
and the smile on mouth bout
ear to ear, cheekbones glowing,
then,
someone wakes angry, ***** double down
*****, slaps the pillow upon you were resting,
growls, nah, howls, and the sheets ain’t big
enough to hide under, and you cannot appeal, squeal, sell threaten big secrets reveal, the noises  are voluminous, ludicrous, insurmountable…

I am an agent provocateur,
making trouble is my busy-e-ness.
Endless and nonetheless, I failed,
Will not reveal what my  bribe was,
and secretly concealed, let me just say this;

please go on saying
“have a nice day”
which they believe
is a prayer to them,
reports of my being
struck by lightning
are just
premature…

Clinically depressed
the clinic's a frickin mess
clinician's under stress
popping patients' cipralex
at her dinky off-white desk
still wearing last night's dress
reminiscing on the days
when she just tried her best

Head won't give it a rest
wishing she'd failed the test
could have been an insta queen
at least got in on the tiktok scene
instead she feels bereft of the chance
to take a breath

She'd rather take a slap
than see another fat smackhead
but she has to pay the rent or
start living in a tent
"It's a living"
that's her mantra
written on the pens
and every one they send
is another couple cents

So she just pretends that
what she does makes sense
punters in
prescriptions out
no time to make amends
patience measured in pence
she can potentially spend
perpetuating searches for
that promised happy end