.
I see her beautiful shape
laying still and quiet in our bed,
sleeping form curled around the pillow
on which I left my scent.
But I am a self made Ghost
and I saw her cry all day.
I am a shadow and feel nothing
and I left her because I loved her.

So I died,
by my own hands,
maybe soon,
she will understand.

I never deserved her, she deserved more,
so I showed myself to the leaving door.
Inside the darkness had begun to call,
step over the edge and start to fall.

Bereft of life, she found my shell,
screamed at me from the depths of Hell.
Tears streamed in gushing torrent
expressing a grief I did not warrant.

So in the ether I pen this note,
words can no longer leave my throat.
I left my love to set her free,
I couldn't keep her bound to me.

And whilst she gazes at my picture on the shelf,
may the Universe bless her not to blame herself.


© Pagan Paul (18/08/17)

I* remember it like yesterday ,
The sun was shining brightly,
Birds were singing gaily
And bees were getting their daily lunch from their neighboring flowers.
Nature took its place on the throne with its beauty.

I remember it like yesterday,
It was an important phone call,
The one I wished I never answered.
Like on cue,
Grey clouds began to cover the sun's yellow face,
And the butterflies disappeared for the day.

I remember it like yesterday,
Nature and I were one.
We both cried that day,
Filled with gloom and looking grey.
Tear after tear kissed my cheek,
As rain drop by raindrop splattered on my roof.

I remember it like yesterday,
Something went terribly wrong,
How could it be?
She was never able to see the beautiful sunlight that I have experienced for these seventeen years now,
Never will she be able to breathe air,
Walk,
Be loved.

I remember it like yesterday,
It was so dark,
And it was only morning,
A bright morning turned as dark as night.
A day like this was to be joyful,
Seeing my new born cousin,
But I'll only be seeing her,
Dead.


Jonesy 2017 ©