You called hatred love
You would tell me you loved me
Right after a fight
Right after you cheated
Right after you talked to her
Right after you left me (every time you left me)
You would tell me we belonged together
After you would turn something you did onto me
My past was labeled as a hall pass for every wrong you did
My cuts for you poison filling my lungs
I could never escape you looking down on me
I was never good enough
But you whispered that I was your paragon
Your queen
So what was I to you?
Evil or happiness?
You were so back and forth
One day it was love
And the next the Reaper appeared
Demeaned me
Said we would fail
You broke me all the time
And I forgave you
Out of love and naivety
You were my whole world
But you broke so many promises
You left me so many times
Can you really say you loved me?

I don't care about
How much I make in a day
I care about how many times
I smile.

She was beautiful in her desire to be free, in her hope for love; she was beautiful more in words than her apperance could ever say.
Most days she feels like a failure, caught in the trap of depression and over thinking.
She cried in the car but as she got closer to home wiped away the tears.
She would only be so weak alone, her mother could never know who she was because she wouldn't understand.
She ignored her problems for the millionth time that month, hoping she wouldn't have to wake up the next morning and have to face it.

She has always been a big girl, never finding the motivation to change.
Food makes her happy and brings her closer to the end.
She can't cry with a mouth full.
He soul shakes, feeling so unstable, she cannot steady her mind.
She wants happiness so bad but finds more  pain at every turn.
Her past builds in her gut and her only hope for a future dies more each day.
She will never be the wife and mother she dreams of.
She will be the ashes that grow in the roots of saplings.
She is the lost girl, the gone girl, she is nothing and she is something and all she wants is an escape into the abyss.

You've never seen someone want
Happiness so **** bad
And somehow
Have it slip through
Their fingertips time and time again.

We are born
Into the chains
Of oppression
Believing it is
Freedom.

Her heart shimmered
Brighter than all the stars

Her capacity to love
Was greater than any others

She had loved you beyond
All human bonds

She had loved you

She loves you

Into the depths of eternity
She will love you

The two of you
Were such bittersweet perfection.

i promised myself id stop writing about
you, stop writing for you, but every chance
i get i scribble down every first we had, and
all the last. i stopped paying attention to the color of your eyes, along with your hands, and the way your teeth show when you smile. although, i still remember every detail, every scar, and bump.
it's been months since i last saw you, but today i thought of you. if you want honesty, i don't think i was ever in love, but something in me likes to believe i could have been. it's been months since i last saw you, and ive finally learned that not everyone you love you're meant to be with, that love can run deeper than just telling each other you do, and sometimes it's then that you realize you don't.
i hope that you still think of me, when you
see flowers on the side of the road, or look over at your passenger side. someday i want to know how it was when she touched you for the first time, and if you saw me when you closed your eyes and held her close. tell me about when you started smoking again and tasted me in every cigarette, how each night you woke up sweating because even in your dreams you couldn't get rid of me.
yes, i hope you still think of me, because i do still think of you, but i hope you've moved on. i always wanted better for you, i always wanted more. you were my fire, but also the rain that put it out.