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 Nov 2023
The Sick Red Carnation
" π‘‡β„Žπ‘’ 𝐡𝑖𝑔 π‘Šπ‘œπ‘œπ‘‘π‘¦ π‘ƒπ‘™π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ "
𝐼 π‘π‘™π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ π‘‘π‘’π‘π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘ π‘’
𝐼𝑛 π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘ π‘šπ‘’π‘™π‘™ π‘œπ‘“ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘Žπ‘‘β„Žπ‘–π‘›π‘”
𝐴𝑛𝑑 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘π‘ ,
πΆπ‘Ÿπ‘’π‘ π‘π‘’π‘›π‘‘ π‘šπ‘œπ‘œπ‘› π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’ π‘‘β„Žπ‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’ π‘‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’ π‘π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘›π‘β„Žπ‘’π‘ ;
πΉπ‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘š π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘π‘šπ‘œπ‘‘β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿ'𝑠 π‘“π‘™π‘œπ‘€π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘¦ 𝑣𝑒𝑖𝑙,
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’ π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘šπ‘Ž π‘œπ‘“ π‘œπ‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘›π‘”π‘’ π‘π‘™π‘œπ‘ π‘ π‘œπ‘š 𝑖𝑠 π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘šπ‘π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘...
𝑂𝑓 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘“π‘™π‘’π‘ β„Ž π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ π‘π‘œπ‘›π‘’π‘ ,
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’ π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘šπ‘Ž π‘œπ‘“ π‘œπ‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘›π‘”π‘’ π‘π‘™π‘œπ‘ π‘ π‘œπ‘š 𝑖𝑠 π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘šπ‘π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘...
𝐴𝑛𝑑 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ 𝑒𝑦𝑒𝑠 π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘’
π‘Šβ„Žπ‘–π‘‘π‘’ π‘œπ‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘›π‘”π‘’ π‘π‘™π‘œπ‘ π‘ π‘œπ‘šπ‘ 
𝐴𝑛𝑑 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ 𝑒𝑦𝑒𝑠 π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘’
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’ π‘‘π‘€π‘œ π‘€β„Žπ‘–π‘‘π‘’ π‘œπ‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘›π‘”π‘’ π‘π‘™π‘œπ‘ π‘ π‘œπ‘šπ‘ 
π‘Œπ‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘šπ‘œπ‘‘β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿ 𝑖𝑠 π‘Ž
π½π‘Žπ‘ π‘šπ‘–π‘›π‘’ π‘ β„Žπ‘Ÿπ‘’π‘ π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ π‘Ž π‘™π‘’π‘šπ‘œπ‘› π‘‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’
𝐼𝑛 π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘šπ‘–π‘‘π‘‘π‘™π‘’ π‘œπ‘“ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘€β„Žπ‘–π‘‘π‘’ π‘ β„Žπ‘–π‘Ÿπ‘‘
π΄π‘šπ‘œπ‘›π‘” π‘šπ‘¦ π‘π‘œπ‘›π‘¦π‘‘π‘Žπ‘–π‘™ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘–π‘Ÿ π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘
πΊπ‘œπ‘™π‘‘π‘’π‘› π‘’π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘Ÿπ‘–π‘›π‘”π‘ ...
πΉπ‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’ π‘“π‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘š π‘›π‘Žπ‘šπ‘’π‘ ;
π‘π‘œπ‘‘ π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘”π‘–π‘ π‘‘π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘‘ 𝑖𝑛 π‘‘β„Žπ‘’
π΅π‘–π‘Ÿπ‘‘β„Ž π‘π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘‘π‘–π‘“π‘–π‘π‘Žπ‘‘π‘’;
𝐴𝑛𝑑 π‘Žπ‘π‘ π‘‘π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘π‘‘π‘–π‘œπ‘› π‘šπ‘’π‘Žπ‘›π‘  π‘π‘Žπ‘™π‘™π‘œπ‘œπ‘›πŸŽˆ
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘π‘π‘¦ 𝐿𝑖𝑙𝑦 π‘“π‘™π‘œπ‘€π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘ ...
𝑀𝑦 π‘œπ‘£π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿπ‘‘π‘ 
π‘†π‘π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘€π‘  π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘’ π‘π‘œπ‘Ÿπ‘› π‘“π‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘š π‘π‘’π‘‘π‘’π‘›π‘–π‘Ž
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’ 𝑓𝑒𝑑𝑒𝑠 π‘œπ‘“ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ 𝑖𝑠 π‘π‘œπ‘Ÿπ‘›
πΉπ‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘š π‘šπ‘¦ π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’π‘› π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ π‘¦π‘’π‘™π‘™π‘œπ‘€ π‘€π‘œπ‘šπ‘
𝑀𝑦 π‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘Žπ‘ π‘‘π‘  π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘’ π‘“π‘œπ‘Ÿπ‘šπ‘’π‘‘ π‘šπ‘œπ‘‘β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿπ‘™π‘¦
𝐼𝑛 π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘‘π‘œπ‘’π‘β„Ž π‘œπ‘“ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘π‘™π‘Žπ‘€π‘ ...
π‘Œπ‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ 𝑀𝑖𝑛𝑑 π‘“π‘™π‘’π‘‘π‘‘π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘–π‘›π‘”
π‘€π‘œπ‘£π‘–π‘›π‘” π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘šπ‘œπ‘’π‘›π‘‘π‘Žπ‘–π‘› π‘œπ‘“
π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘π‘ 
π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘π‘  π‘π‘œπ‘šπ‘’ π‘Žπ‘™π‘–π‘£π‘’
π‘Œπ‘œπ‘’ π‘€π‘Žπ‘£π‘’ π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ π‘œπ‘“ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘™π‘’π‘Žπ‘“
π‘Žπ‘‘ π‘šπ‘’...
𝐼𝑛 π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ β„Žπ‘œπ‘’π‘ π‘’,
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿπ‘’ 𝑖𝑠 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’π‘› π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘π‘’ π‘‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿπ‘’ 𝑖𝑠 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘¦π‘’π‘™π‘™π‘œπ‘€ π‘ π‘’π‘›π‘™π‘–π‘”β„Žπ‘‘
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿπ‘’ 𝑖𝑠 π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘ π‘œπ‘’π‘›π‘‘ π‘œπ‘“ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ
𝑏𝑒𝑙𝑙𝑠 π‘π‘™π‘Žπ‘¦π‘–π‘›π‘”...
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’ π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’π‘› π‘ β„Žπ‘–π‘šπ‘šπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘œπ‘“ π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ 𝑠𝑒𝑛,
π‘†β„Žπ‘–π‘›π‘–π‘›π‘” π‘œπ‘› π‘‘β„Žπ‘’
π‘¦π‘’π‘™π‘™π‘œπ‘€ 𝑀𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 π‘œπ‘“ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’...
𝐼'𝑣𝑒 𝑑𝑖𝑒𝑑 π‘π‘œπ‘™π‘œπ‘Ÿπ‘“π‘’π‘™ π‘π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘¦π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘  π‘‘π‘œ
π‘Šπ‘’π‘’π‘π‘–π‘›π‘” π‘€π‘–π‘™π‘™π‘œπ‘€ π‘“π‘œπ‘Ÿ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’
π‘Œπ‘œπ‘’'𝑣𝑒 π‘‘β„Žπ‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘€π‘› π‘Ž 𝑝𝑖𝑒𝑐𝑒 π‘œπ‘“ 𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑒 π‘ π‘˜π‘¦
π΅π‘’β„Žπ‘–π‘›π‘‘ π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’π‘› π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ π‘¦π‘’π‘™π‘™π‘œπ‘€ π‘™π‘’π‘Žπ‘£π‘’π‘  π‘œπ‘“ π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘π‘œπ‘šπ‘’π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘›π‘Žπ‘‘π‘’ π‘‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’...
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’ π‘‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’ π‘œπ‘“ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘“π‘™π‘’π‘ β„Ž,
𝐺𝑖𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘‘ π‘π‘œπ‘šπ‘’π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘›π‘Žπ‘‘π‘’π‘ 
π‘‡β„Žπ‘’ π‘‘π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’ π‘œπ‘“ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘“π‘™π‘’π‘ β„Ž,
𝐺𝑖𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘‘ π‘π‘œπ‘šπ‘’π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘›π‘Žπ‘‘π‘’π‘ 
π‘Œπ‘œπ‘’ π‘™π‘Žπ‘’π‘”β„Žπ‘–π‘›π‘”
𝑖𝑛 π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘‘ π‘π‘œπ‘šπ‘’π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘›π‘Žπ‘‘π‘’ 𝑠𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑠...
𝐼 π‘˜π‘–π‘ π‘  π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘’π‘› π‘π‘œπ‘›π‘‘ π‘“π‘–π‘ β„Ž
π‘œπ‘› π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ 𝑙𝑖𝑝𝑠...
𝑀𝑦 π‘ π‘œπ‘›...!
𝑀𝑦 π‘šπ‘œπ‘œπ‘›...!
π‘‚β„Ž, π‘šπ‘¦ π‘ π‘œπ‘› π‘œπ‘“ π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘šπ‘œπ‘œπ‘›!
𝐼 π‘‘π‘œ π‘›π‘œπ‘‘ π‘π‘’π‘™π‘œπ‘›π‘” π‘‘π‘œ π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ π‘ π‘œπ‘π‘–π‘’π‘‘π‘¦...
𝐼 π‘π‘’π‘™π‘œπ‘›π‘” π‘‘π‘œ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ π‘œπ‘›π‘™π‘¦....
حَیؒة🌱
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 Jan 2023
sandra wyllie
I Wasted
a lot of head space
over him. Recounting every touch,
hanging myself on a memory, swinging
in his clutch. Shrinking inside the silhouette,
smaller than a bead of sweat.

I wasted
so many days in a haze. Weeping
dewdrops, running down my face
in a trickle. Sour
as a pickle floating in a sea
of brine tangled on his fishing line.

I wasted
myself in a bottle of alcohol,
living in this gilded cage, and turning
out page after page every day.

I wasted
my youth
on things that were lies
not truth. Stuck as flies
to paper. This pain does not
ever taper.
Continue reading...
 Jan 2023
irinia
letter to my father (1)
β€œtheir mental state contains something lethal:
past, nothing but past” Nikolay Y Ossipov

you measured your height
with the mountains
your fists with the howl
of lonely wolves
to avoid helplessness stupidity confusion:
the all too encompassing human nature

I no longer want to keep you
in the alternative dimension
guarding your wholeness
I'll let you fall into pieces
I'll let you die the death destined
to you
instead of crushing him
or imploding myself
for him to rearrange his fragments
for me to hope for all the levels
of coherence
I/we are capable of

bodies afraid or in love are the most intense
I want my body back
from your battlefield of delusions
your pain is not my pain
your despair is not mine
your manic refusal of touch
is still my manic capacity
to love wounds tragedies
aborted laughter
some words are mirrors
I'll keep writing to you
till there is no escape
from the clarity
of dawn:
all my love is of
no real use
to you
writing can be therapy to decontaminate love
#father #loveless #imagination #loneliness #pain #love
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 Nov 2021
Thomas W Case
Nothing's Easy when you're Down
Saturn is in
line with
Venus tonight
but, nothing's easy
when you're down.
The clowns walk
around, dressed in
yellow; fast food smiles
and cheeseburger
souls, and nothings
easy when you're down.

The dancers with poles
and sadness, that Halloween,
fires burning, childhood
perfumed dreams,
kind of sadness fills the
navy blue night.
I can't find the North star,
and the jack-lanterns lie rotting
in the streets of Nebraska
and Kansas, and the candies
all gone, and the kids wait.
And I can't findΒ Β 
the deep blue shirt I bought
at Goodwill, and Billy Burroughs
is filled with worms and earth,
and Bukowski looks at Satan
and says, "what do you
mean, we're out of whiskey?"

I've never been much for the stars,
and family and Thanksgiving are
painfully overrated,
and nothing's easy when
you're down.
check out my youtube channel  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wN63fddvsTI&
#pain #depression #sadness #providence
Continue reading...
 Aug 2021
Thomas W Case
God, How I Miss You
When the
naked branches
blew in
the late
autumn winds,
our love died.
How I long
for the days
of spring,
when all was
alive with
newness.
We lay beneath
the willow tree
and dined on wine,
bread and love.
God,
how I miss you.
Here's a link to my you tube channel where I read this poem and others from my recently published book, Seedy Town Blues Collected Poems.
#longing #regret
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 Mar 2021
Imran Islam
Try To Feel My Pain
Baby, don't worry
about my sore
Not to worry, darling
Just love me some more!

You no need to fix my broken heart
Just try to feel my pain in your heart
Oh, baby, I'm coming to you
Please, don't close your door!

I'm not asking for the moon
I'm not looking for the rain
Darling, just look at my eyes
and make me smile again!

Stop walking away from me
and listen to me, oh babe!
Lemme see your face one more last time
if you don't love me anymore!
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