If you saw all of me what would you say how would you feel
Some days it’s just a nightmare, but some days it seems all too real
I’m not as good as I’d like to be or how I might appear
If I’m not careful darkness creeps in and fills me with fear
It is a heavy thick blanket oppressing the light
It upsets me and I feel contrite

If you knew the secrets that dwell in the dark
And touched the faded scars that have made their mark
If you knew my sins and the things I’ve done wrong
Even though the difference between good and bad I’ve known all along
Could you know all of this and still choose to stay
Would it change anything would it turn you away?

There are memories I’d rather not relive
And sometimes I still find it hard to forgive
I have been at fault and I have failed before
Turned my back ran away or slammed the door
Could you go on with this knowing?
Would you still be okay if all of me was showing?

I am broken I am bruised may be down but I’m not out
While I have seen my share of troubles my spirit remains stout
My record isn’t spotless but I’ll often fight tooth and nail
My days are an adventure and my life a storied tale
I ask: when all is said and done
What will be your answer, could you be the one

I have wandered far and wide
I have shared laughter I’ve hung my head and cried
I have been in beautiful harmony and at times in discord
I have been despised sometimes and others I was adored
All this and more is part of who I am
A surprising lot in common with a little lamb

Prone to stray and get separated from the flock
Lost afraid and in trouble I find myself secured upon the rock
I know the voice of the one who leads me and who cares
He loves me still even when my soul is laid bare
Will you take me as I am and love me just the same?
This too I do for you to live as your love deserves: this will be my aim

I'm crying in the dark and the lights aren't flicking on
And the monsters hiding under my bed are coming out to play
But nothing can stop them from devouring me and
I'm crying I'm crying I'm crying
There's a ringing in my ears like a gun was fired by my head
Or a bomb was dropped on my house
I can't see what the damage is because I"m too busy covering my face
But nothing can stop the shrapnel from stabbing me in the chest
You threw the bomb
You fired the gun
How does it feel to be a murderer?
I can't sleep at night knowing that you aren't thinking of me
Like I'm thinking of you
Does it hurt your chest to think that you're never going to see me again?
Because it steals my breath away from my lungs
I can't ******* breath because the thought of you leaving forever
Is one I'd rather not imagine
Is it sad to say that dying seems like a better option than considering what
We could have happened?
It's so cliche but
Jesus ******* Christ
If what they say is true
Then shouldn't it be getting better?

in the way it comes slow, then all at once.

Catch me before I fall, darling
I'm falling too fast for the eye to see

I can't catch my breath, darling
Something's caught in my lungs
It's growing out of the seeds you planted there

I'm afraid, darling
I'm afraid that they're nothing but weeds that you planted
Because I thought that we had something beautiful
But once it all comes out of my throat I'm afraid of what I'll see

I've figured I'm done missing you
It's so tiring, darling

I'm tired of feeling like **** all the time
But I don't know how to feel any other way
It's turned into my home and if I feel any other way I'm homeless

I don't like talking to people
It's like a dread that swallows me whole
My insides fold in on themselves
What kind of life is it to live in constant fear of interaction?

I've had my life planned out for the past 10 years
And all of the sudden it's all gone
How does all of this ******* happen?
I thought I had everything figured out
But I can't think straight and I don't want a future
I don't want to live life struggling.

///

Everything is separated from each other
But when you see silently
It seems all together
The day sleeps in the night as I exist in you

The born,
The death all for thee
Black or white
True or false all for thee

The continents are separated, isolated
As we are alienated from each other
But on the other hand we are all together
Apparently we are  moving toward the different direction

The dark,
The light all for thee
Silence or thunder
Melody or chaos all for thee

Either it’s a stone or an emotion
Even either love or hate,
Neither war nor peace
Neither dialectics nor mystic
All  have bent you and me

There are too many invisible divine strings
On every matter or even every non matter
yet bonded with the heaven and the hell
So, all we move toward the same destination

///
@ Musfiq us shaleheen