I sip my morning coffee religiously
but lately my two shots doesn't feel
as bitter as it used to be

Perhaps that's the thing about life;
you get used to bitterness so much that
you can no longer distinguish which one is which
since everything tastes all the same

Or perhaps, the thought of you crossed my mind
and all the pain suddenly comes rushing back
as if I am being tormented for the sins I didn't commit

My wounds are burning; they’re still half-open
almost to the point it's unbearable for me to mend
had I known the bruise would left me scars this deep
I would have walked the opposite direction that day

In the end,
You betrayed us and my trust
Your hypocrisy only goes so far
with each lies slowly unraveled

Perhaps,
You didn’t love me at all
You love the idea of loving me
You thought you knew what love was

To me,
Love is never a phrase
It’s always been a verb

Opportunity knocks you once
but certainly not twice

So this is it—the final closure
of what I would forever call
an almost;
a road not taken
a missed connection;
a wasted second chance;

We may have everything
but never time

I wish one day
I'd be lucky enough
to meet someone
who speaks my language
so I don't have to spend
a lifetime
translating my soul

The clock is ticking

Time is fleeting before my eyes

It almost feels like
all these moments
turned into memories
in a blink of an eye

Oh, dear Time

Please, please, please
slow down a little bit
freeze if you would

Please, please, please
I'm started to lose grips
of everyone; everything

Dear Grandma and Grandpa,

How's the Earth looking from up there?
I bet you wouldn't even bother about the livings anymore,
I bet you couldn't wait for the Heaven; the eternity

Dear Grandma and Grandpa,

Forgive me,
For every time I see a butterfly perched on my window I always thought that was you missing me
Forgive me,
For every time I see a cat around the backyard I always thought that was you visiting and checking up on me

Dear Grandma and Grandpa,

Now I'm at peace, realizing that you are free from any physical pains;
As you are no longer burdened by your glaucoma or sudden heart attack
As your fragile skins won't have to be bruised when you coincidentally knocked on the table
As you won't have to feel headache each time you're overwhelmed by the thoughts of your family

Dear Grandma and Grandpa,

Still, it doesn't feel right for my brain to comprehend that
My childrens won't ever get to hear the warmth of your voices;
Tasting the overburnt eggs and noodles you used to make;
Watching your favorite old movies in the afternoon;
Playing with the wrinkles on your hands;
or making fun of your white hair

Dear Grandma and Grandpa,

I know you will never know about this
But I'm down on my knees
Silently pray inbetween the night and the dawn;
So that the angels will not be too harsh on you
In hereafter

& so i fill,
i fill,
i fill;
every void
every space
every hollow
with my own
until it’s spilled
& reach the edges
until it’s full enough
that it doesn’t require
anyone else—but myself