Carsyn Smith

Carsyn Smith May 2015

You
        may
               be
                    in
                       my
                             dreams,
                                          but
                                                you
                                                      are
                                                            not
                                                                  of
                                                                      them.

Don't flatter yourself

#love #heartbreak #dreams

Carsyn Smith Apr 2015

The Woes of a Wordsmith

I ponder, perhaps too much, of how I've lost my touch. I wonder if, in my delusion, it was just a dreamed haven. Somewhere in the hours of meditation, someway I've lost my salvation. My thoughts are trapped and closed like a man-lake is cement opposed, like soaring eagles discover they are just gifted wren actors, or the chlorine stinging your eyes is the spray of ocean waves crying. I feel like a snuffed candle trying to burn, a cloud wisp trying to rain, a parched rose trying to flourish, a winter breeze trying to warm your fingers. Suddenly I feel a kith with the discarded plastic bottles littering my beach, for, like them, I am searching for a purpose out of reach: the woes of a cursed wordsmith.

ranting about my loss of muse/inspiration

#empty #trying #poets #struggle #failing

Carsyn Smith Apr 2015

Shots Fired

When I do meet the gun that will not fire,
I cross the trigger that has yet to rest.
My heart yearns for the ear of a liar,
a dark cipher and gnawed gold in his breast,
as fingers ache for the truth in his eye,
gilded guiles, a world he keeps private.
In a dream he shot me sweet as a sigh
with a touch fatal as any bullet,
but dreams melt like red and blue to purple,
creating a world of passion and pain --
he is a chained ankle and an angel,
a cold-shouldered knave and soft summer rain,
a night vision of hope and black regret:
a misfired gun I will not forget.

#love #heartbreak #dream

Carsyn Smith Apr 2015

Lakeside Suicide

The surface ripples like the whisper of
A knife through the space between her
Ribs, and although it may be Great, it
Is but a spec on the sapphire that is our
Earth. Thousand stepped lavender
Converse soles suspended, kissing the
Lips of the restless waves like a
Gentleman upon her pearl clasped
Glove, oh how I wish she could see the
Way her eyes pulled at me like a
Riptide. And oh how I'd give to kiss
The water in her place, but she made
Love to the very lake she bore from
The depths of sleepless nights. She was
Waterborne with every crumbling step
Over cracked city sidewalks,
Wandering like a bottled message at
The whim of currents. I think she
Would have liked to sink to the
Bottom, but they've raised her like a
Bullet shredded battle flag. I think she
Would have floated in the silence of
Eternity instead of speaking through
Rotting lips. Perhaps would have
Rather whispered the petals of a
Midnight rose to his boat than kissed
The tips of his time tattered converse
Sneakers. Perhaps she would have
Wanted to catch him as he mirrored
Her dive into
oblivion?

#love #heartbreak #suicide

Carsyn Smith Apr 2015

A Spring Night's Dream

Drop the leaf, and allow yourself relief.
Much like the mysteries of lifeless time,
Much like my cursed gift of endless rhyme,
I can not tell you why comes the nighttime.
From my great wisdom, I can tell you this:
Let thy leaf fall and give mine roots a kiss,
And I can offer what you look for -- bliss.
For your sake I prayed I be false in sight,
Now you breathe and your life must thank thy knight.
Foolish is he to look for death to spite,
Now a price you must pay to make things right.
Oh dear gods, you victim child of fate,
The jealous martyr will demand and wait
For thine toll now that you see death’s black gate.

The Dreaming Tree. I don't do drugs, my mind just breathes differently. <3

#dream

Carsyn Smith Apr 2015

Wishing Well Diving

Pray tell, where be the sun that kept me warm,
And where be your body when comes the storm?
If I, asleep and drowning in the well,
Could see the stars, I’d dream of tales they’d tell:
Of you, of me, of what we used to be.
Luna watches me sleep on currency,
On tears of the dewy eyed wish-makers.
Bed of bargains, blanket of still waters,
Drowning in you, yet desert with needing.
They see me as a drought’d man bleeding
And you a cool glass of tricky poison:
Still I came to sell my soul or my sun.
How fitting it was you who pushed me down,
Took your heart from me, so in this well I’ll drown.

I'm not really sure what message I'm saying exactly. Mostly word ***** and my first attempt at a sonnet. :) excited to try again soon

#love #heartbreak #wish

Carsyn Smith Apr 2015

Has anyone ever written something for you?

Has anyone ever written something for
you? You who labors over pages of
raw emotion, who stares at the same
space on the wall from evening sun to
early moon in search of the perfect
word? Have hands cramped and
callused over the hills and valleys of
your name, blistered and cut, not
bothering to acknowledge the trickling
of blood because it quickly turns from
pain into sweet ruby devotion? Have
you ever had your indents caressed?
You know, the deep ones between
your thumb and fingers or the striped
ones on your mid arms from scribbling
scattered thoughts onto weathered
pages? Has anyone ever watched the
way your eyes shine when you think?
Did they see the way you search
tumbling storm clouds for the single
silver ray, or the depth of the soulless
ocean for the glint of golden treasure?
Has anyone ever told you how beautiful
your mind is? How, if the world went
black, you would cherish the way a fire
dances on a wax stage? Has anyone
ever written something for you?
Because I would. I would write you a
thousand sonnets, haikus and ballads if
you'd look at me with those shining
eyes and think of me with that beautiful mind.

(6 of 10)

#love #friendship #beauty