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 Oct 2023 Heather Anderson
August
He gave me dead flowers
So I can smell them every day
The rotten petals falling
The color of decay

The washed out sunflower
The dehydrated leaves
The mold on the water
The color of debris

The richly red rose
Now drooping to the floor
The color of love
Existed no more

But still I saved the flowers
And smelled them every day
And watered them with tears
To let them grow again.
The pains in my belly
Are almost comforting.
Something’s inside down there and you’re creating it.
can you feel her?
She’s in there
Waiting for me,
Waiting for mommy to make up her mind, Waiting for me to use my sense, Waiting for me by handing me the opportunity not to be useless.
Oh baby..
I’m sorry daddy just isn’t happy..
I want you to know that
Mommy just isn’t ready
And mommy would never place a lifetime of harm upon you.
You are the design combined of everything I’ve wanted
and everything I’ve loved.
You’re what I always wanted.
I just can’t bare to give you up...
Mommy will be with you in another life...
a safe place for us to play.
a safe place for you to grow.
I’ll be ready then.
I love you my all
Until we meet again my bean
~ sincerely, a pregnant teen
Such a decision no not based on pride but empathy and reason for another number in our horrid foster system.
 Oct 2023 Heather Anderson
Nylee
I am unnoticeable
Hardly visible
You can see right through me
I am part of the air
My presence is an absence
Void is my existence.

I don't exist in anyone's mind
I don't have place in anyone's heart
My shadow is so faded
No one sees it, no one minds it
Believe me you won't believe me
Cause you will not see me at all
.
 Oct 2023 Heather Anderson
abby
We are the ones who are hard to understand
We'll be the last ones in the movie theatre
because the ending scene made us cry
We'll stop to smell the roses
because they deserve to be appreciated
We are the ones who will take the time
to learn what keeps you up at night
We are the ones who will imagine
an entire future of adventures
with the people who show us love

We are the ones who will love you more
than we love ourselves
We will give you our strongest parts
in hopes that we can make things better
We desire to see you become the best you
to make sure that you always feel our love
We crave affection and appreciation
We give a piece of ourselves away every day
sometimes to people who don't deserve it
Our love is easy to take advantage of
and sometimes we don't get back
the love that we give away

When we hurt, we crumble and fall apart
We constantly have to put ourselves back together
We are more fragile than we like to give off
We carry our emotions on our sleeves
Our flaws have the ability to consume us
We aren't afraid to give you the world
but we are afraid to feel unloved
We want you to see what we see
We want you to understand where we're coming from

We are good people with good intentions
We are stronger than we believe
Not everyone can feel the way we feel
We feel too much, too often
We are not hard to love
We are something not everyone knows how to love
But you need to remember that
your worth does not change just because
no one is there to appreciate you, to remind you

You are not any less lovable
You are the most lovable person in the world
You are a light that the world needs
Your kindness is not your weakness
You do not need to change for anyone's acceptance
You do not need to stop giving love
just because you don't get any back
Your heart is the best thing about you

And one day when you least expect it
someone will notice you from across the room
and know exactly how to love you
They will think all of these things are beautiful
They will deserve the love you can give
They will fill the empty space in your heart
But for now, don't stop feeling
We are the ones who feel everything so deeply
We are the ones who can't give up because
We are the ones who will teach the world
how to love
We are exactly who we are supposed to be
 Jan 2023 Heather Anderson
Theia
the
tiny flame
that stayed
inside
me
for you
is burning me
alive
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