I remember when I saw you hurt
I also remember how it hurt me to see you in such pain

And not the crimson streams and purples and blues etched on your skin, hurt
the kind of hurt that you thought only you felt.
But the thing is,
I understood.
I understood your pain more than I understood the back of my own **** hand

More often than not, I regret touching people because I ruin everything I touch and you were already broken enough
But for some unknown reason,
I touched you and you looked at me with only love in your eyes,
and you told me ever since we met, you began to hurt a little less

she left yesterday
said it would make the pain go away
because you see, she had been feeling that way for a while.
her antidepressants couldn't keep up
and her parents' negative comments were just too much.

so she made her choice
always saying that if it were to happen; it was what's best for her
she didn't even leave me a ******* note
or send me a text message
i hate myself because i never thought too much into it; we both would joke about it for ***** sake.
but no one ever ******* said that that joke would become my reality

old friendships are restarting
and people are forgiving those who actually hurt them but you cant even glance my ******* way when i walk by

i know you said it was over
but i thought after a while
your heart would ache like mine does and you'd miss me back.
its been two months
and you still haven't come around.

did you even love me?
i ******* loved you more than i thought was possible
did you even want me?
are you doing okay without me?
because i cant sleep knowing you aren't in my life anymore but it sure as hell seems like you've been sleeping better without me around

and i want to scream in your face when i see you and i want to say "*******" as much as i can
but every time work up the courage to say anything
i see you with someone new
and you laugh
and you look happy

i guess thats all i really ever wanted;
for you to be happy
but i didn't think that wanting your happiness meant cutting me out of your life

when i told you i had to go
i don't think you knew i meant forever

i guess thats all i really ever wanted;
for you to be happy
but i didn't think that wanting your happiness meant cutting me out of your life

i need to learn how to forget you
to let you go
because right now im hurting and i dont think i can ******* breathe without you

everyone always says i have them to talk to
but i only want you
and you only want her

so i need to lose you
i need you to tell me you hate me and that you want to never hear from me again
otherwise ill be stuck on you forever
im your own personal leech
and i need to be burnt off
for good.

i texted you last night
i poured my ******* heart out to you
and you responded with a picture of you and her in bed that said "waking up next to my baby"
i don't think I've ever felt a pain like that
i wish i could hate you
i wish i could take back every ******* word I've ever said to you