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  Aug 16 bitter lover
Nikita
The version of me you never met
Was the best secret that I ever kept

False smiles and a witty joke
You'll never see past the positivity cloak

Why would I tell you I'm not fine
When you don't let me in your mind

Hair up and makeup done
You'll never see me in the evening sun

Meals prepped, trash stashed away
You hear only what I want to say

Even this account is best kept private
If you knew my truth, you'd never survive it
Love is a bitter ache,
And a mad sea
Beneath a pounding storm.
But,
I still whisper
Drunk off its sweet wind.
You could boil my blood
But I still want you

I need you.
- C.c
Rejection
With a side of
Self torture
It’s no one’s fault
It didn’t work out
You quietly ignore
Today as before
Not even sure
If you can see the door
the wind moves my feet.
my eyes shining like the sun and the sea.

"your love brings me to my knees."

her sigh is a whisper
soft like autumn leaves
silently falling to the cold ground.

the shadow of a smile.
my heart misplaced
like a paper lantern in the rain.

my broken sky,

her soft sigh
and I was no longer hers.
one for those people who can't sleep
  Aug 16 bitter lover
chrissy who
I’m sorry I wrote you.
I’m sorry I’m as weak as I told you.
I’m sorry I wasn’t lying.
I’m sorry I never lied.
I’m sorry for all the broken nights
I’m sorry I couldn’t fix them.
I’m sorry I couldn’t fix myself
I’m sorry I couldn’t help you.
I’m sorry I messed everything up
I’m sorry I couldn’t take it anymore.
I’m sorry I got tired of being alone
I’m sorry the permanence makes it easier.
I’m sorry you can’t write anymore.
I’m sorry I never could.
I’m sorry you couldn’t see yourself how I always saw you
I’m sorry you can’t see what I still see.
I’m sorry I loved you.
I’m sorry I loved you harder than I’ve loved anyone else
I’m sorry you made me question myself.
I’m sorry it ended this way.
I’m sorry I kept writing because I didn’t know how not to
I’m sorry you told me I could.
I’m sorry I didn’t listen when you said I should stop
I’m sorry I didn’t listen when everyone said I should stop.
I’m sorry I took all those nights seriously.
I’m sorry I believed every word you said.
Well…not every word.
I’m sorry I became such a problem
I’m sorry nobody listened to me.
I’m sorry for being right.
I’m sorry the permanence makes it easier.
I’m sorry I failed you.
I’m sorry I took the hit
I’m sorry I asked you to do that
I’m sorry I let you
I’m sorry you didn’t listen.
I’m sorry I couldn’t stand seeing the bracelet anymore
Or the pictures
Or the letters
Or the poem.
I’m sorry I can’t touch them without getting nauseous.
I’m sorry the permanence makes it easier.
I’m sorry I don’t even hurt that much anymore.
I’m sorry I don’t think of you as often as I should
I’m sorry you’re not sorry that I don’t think of you as often as I used to think I should
I’m sorry it ended this way.
I’m sorry you don’t care.
I’m sorry I don’t believe your goodbye
I’m sorry I don’t believe any of it.
I’m sorry I don’t care.
I’m sorry I sort of wish it was different
I’m sorry I think this is probably for the best.
I’m sorry I can’t be there to fix it
I’m sorry you let me go.
I’m sorry the other side of this coin is gone,
Your half dozen of these tacos are still here,
We never watched Finding Nemo.
You never finished renaming the constellations.
I’m sorry I never finished teaching them to you.
I’m sorry bandanas are now out of your life
I’m sorry you never wear sports bras.
I’m sorry my hands feel empty and naked
Now that yours are gone.
I’m sorry your hand was the best thing that ever happened to mine.
I’m sorry that was such a cheesy line.
I’m sorry I want a hair-cut
I’m sorry I want to chop it all off.
I’m sorry you’ve ruined that side of town for me
I’m sorry I’m no longer allowed.
I’m sorry it ended this way.
I’m sorry I would want to forget me too.
I’m sorry I kept writing letters
I’m sorry you never read them
I’m sorry I never will again.
  Aug 16 bitter lover
nooneknoes
im sorry
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