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Welcome Back To This, Your Isle



The rabbits beneath the deck,
Even the pesky deer who eat the shrubbery,
Sea creatures, living and spirits of the dead,
Lying on the paths and in the creeks of Silver Beach,
All inquire:

Was it better wherever you went?

Were the:

Bears, hiding in the forests outside Berlin,
Eagles, double headed, of Russia
Herring, fried, creamed, wined,
From the vendors on the docks of
Helsinki, Riga, Visby and Tallinn,
Salmon, smoked and cured in Stockholm,
More impressive,
Tastier than our striped bass,
Island cohorts of yours, who waited patiently
For their chronicler to return?

Did the Little Mermaid and her Dolphin
Guardians of the Port of Copenhagen
Welcome you more warmly than your friends,
The ospreys, lizards, turtles and owls
Who overwatch your steps and safety
When hiking in Mashomack Preserve?

Are the interlacing tidal creeks,
Woodlands, fields, salt marshes and the ragged,
Irregular but charmed coastline of this cherished island
Any lesser than those of Scandinavia?

Are the sea-going ferries that transverse the
Baltic Sea and the Gulf of Finland,
More poetic than the Menantic or the Lt. Joe,
Who carry you swiftly home to us?

The National Geographic people say that in
Tivoli Gardens, The Amerikaner (ha!) waffle ice cream cone
Is one of the ten best in the world.
Guessing they have not made it yet to the
Tuck Shop for some Moose Tracks!

Were you unaware that our isle settled before
Peter the Great ever envisioned creating the grand
Boulevards of his capitol, St. Petersburg,
Route 114 was a traveled forest path,
By settlers and Indians, not serfs.

Of the Treasures, the Gold Room of the Hermitage,
The Amber Room of Catherine's Palace,
Wrote not a single word, we observe.
Your attentions, they did not deserve?

The answers all, self evident.

Here, surrounded by the gentle breezes of
Long Island Sound and Gardiners Bay,
Sweet and salty flavors of the Peconic atmosphere,
Words unlocked, from your eyes to the page fall,
Smudged by joyous tears, for the muses of the island
Have embraced you yet again and rebirthed
Inspiration, within their comforting, sheltering grasp.


Silver Beach

July 22, 2012
 May 2018 Brian Hoffman
soliana
she gave me her nudes
she was bare
and naked
and so out
and open
and i willingly
accepted it
because it wasnt the nudes
that showed her body
the physical aspects
that made her beautiful
it was the words
she didnt choose
and the spontaneity
that left her
either from her lips
or her fingers
or ink

she was as bare
as her nudes
and i accepted
her for her.
10:02 PM 5/1/2018
 May 2018 Brian Hoffman
Faithy
I find myself in this state of mind, where I fear getting better, I am totally and utterly afraid of what is going to happen and I don’t know how to process such things. I don’t know why I am locking myself away from such a wanted and needed feeling that is right in front of me, I keep myself withdrawn from ever feeling something good for too long, I fear comfort in happiness. I am so scared to fall too deeply into something I may not come out of—once again as I tend to desert  myself in places I don’t know how to find my way back to, for I vanish into thin air and leave with the words ‘I love you’. I wake up with an ache in my heart, and full medicine bottles on my night stand as I  repeatedly spiral out of control just to never reach the end of this, I am a bottomless pit of disparity. I feel like I am drowning myself, Where my mind is trying to **** me, and my heart is involuntarily keeping me alive, I am suffocating; I’m trying to breathe but I simply cannot reach the surface for air, I am far too deep to come back.
It was night as I woke to a choking to my throat
To a squeezing to my ribs
Binding my body
Binding my feet
Restricted
Can not move
Struggle for air
A being hanging
With a stare
It did not care
I take a mouth full of air
I'm scared
Then it jumps to attack
I'm fighting on my back
An evil is apon me
I fight for my soul
The darkness to take me
It crushing the air out of me
I prey
I prey
Please leed me to light
As I fight this dark night.
I wake with a scream
A nightmare
A bad dream.
I had a recurring nightmare of being crushed to death bye a black darkness this is it x me writing about is my therapy . Thank god I don't have this nightmare no more x
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