With his eloquent tongue,
Quick wit,
And grinning eyes.
He made us love him.
He made us feel loved.
If only for a moment.
Then it got ugly.
Suddenly there were questions.
Fighting amongst ourselves.
Betraying one another.
Never trusting.
No one.
Not even ourselves.
He made us weak.
Afraid.
Spiteful.
He turned us into something we're not.
He played us all.
He crushed us.
Or tried to.
Without a thought.
Without a care.
With his crippled black soul,
Deadened eyes,
And withered self.
Hidden behind a handsome mask,
A gentle hand,
His lies.
His fear drove him.
His fear of being realized.
His fear of being alone,
And others seeing him,
As he really is.
For he is dark,
He is apathetic,
He doesn't feel what others feel.
He cannot feel remorse,
Except for in fear of himself.
For he only cares for himself.  
He claims he doesn't care.
He claims to be free.
Free of restraints.
Free of emotion.
Free of love.
But for what he claims is free,
Is imprisoned in fear.
For he is a coward.
Terribly frightened.
Afraid of others.
What they might say.
What they might think.
But mainly he is afraid of himself.
For he knows his noxious soul,
Will one day find him.
Abandoned.
Exposed.
The day he knows he is unloved.
The day he knows he is alone.
Alone with no one but himself.
The one he fears the most.
He will weep.
For nothing is stronger.
Nor more horrifying.
Than facing one's greatest fear.
To open one's eyes.
To face all alone.
The one you despise the most.
To see in the mirror,
The demon you've become,
As no fear is stronger,
Than that of oneself.

He said it was perfect, almost soothing.
Those were words I could not fathom, for I couldn't have felt more different.

Thunder struck and I shivered,
as a relaxed grin swept its way onto his face.
He reached out and welcomed me into his gleaming aura.
Lightening engulfed the once dulled sky once more, but I was unfazed,
my worry consumed by his warmth.

"Perfect" I whispered.

You are the lump in my throat,
And I am trying not to choke
On words unsaid
And notes unread.
But the letters have started to look jumbled,
My voice is coming out mumbled
And I cannot remember what it was
That I was waiting to discuss.
But here you are, you’re laying against me now,
A tight line is formed against my mouth
And I’m trying to tell you just how I feel
But the sentences I form will not become real.

Do you think I could lie forever in your arms, watching the autumn leaves fall lazily out of the sky, like the millions of wishes sent around the world?
Your arms, strong and protective, could keep me warm against the chill that sends whispers down my body, seeking to break my vulnerable mind.
Isn’t it funny how you’re unable to see how you break down my barriers?
How you have placed yourself so deeply inside my soul that your roots have become a part of who I am, who I’ve become, who I ultimately seek to be.
Forever and a day, a second too short, I wish to be yours, my love.
To wake in the cloudy morning light and feel your hand resting against my heart, beating an uneven rhythm only for you.
Fighting over sausage or bacon, peas or snaps, your laughter the soundtrack to my life, to my memories, fitting around me like a warm blanket.
Creating a life that will hold traces of eternity, a happiness that could only seem otherworldly, as it brings me up so very high.
And on that day when forever takes a break, I will seek that hand against mine, and those greens I will carry into the next world.