my home before i knew what home was
i miss you more everyday

a hard truth.

a hard truth is to tell you i can't bare the thought of you
not believing me.

a hard truth is telling you i cant be with you if you don't believe me.
That is my hardest truth.

To lose you to show you i have been nothing but faithful,
to rip my soulmate from myself,
to take everything away from myself,
to beg you to see,
to have patience,
to still love you unconditionally for years knowing you think i'm capable of evil things,
trying to prove to you i simply would never.
This is a hard truth.

Matter cannot be created or destroyed/

How much you matter to me cannot be destroyed,
and for me to matter cannot be created.
I dont matter to you,
so dont pretend that i do.

It is ridiculous to expect anything in return for relentlessly being there when someone has no one else to help them to become whole again.
I did it purely out of love.
Still, i lie here hollowed out by expectations,
alone,
reaching for company that has long forgotten.

I am drunk.
Drunk surrounded by my four walls that have never even heard talk of sin.
crickets scream, and my candle fills the room with the smells of autumn.

i feel surprisingly calm,
or maybe that's just the wine.

Cheers to finally getting some sleep

Perhaps the reason there is so much suffering in this world is because
We aren't made for this world