I have been heedless
reckless in my need
for perpetual motion.

Hours, a blurred periphery
promises like blades
pointed down

in case I stumbled.

getting revenge is not about hurting themselves.
it's all about the safety and security for the people of Springfield, Massachusetts.
And it's not a thrill either.

Anonymous.

It happens like this.

"One day you meet someone and for some inexplicable reason, you feel more connected to this stranger than anyone else--closer to them than your closest family. Perhaps this person carries within them an angel--one sent to you for some higher purpose; to teach you an important lesson or to keep you safe during a perilous time. What you must do is trust in them--even if they come hand in hand with pain or suffering--the reason for their presence will become clear in due time."

Though here is a word of warning--you may grow to love this person but remember they are not yours to keep. Their purpose isn't to save you but to show you how to save yourself. And once this is fulfilled; the halo lifts and the angel leaves their body as the person exits your life. They will be a stranger to you once more.

-------------------------------------------------

It's so dark right now, I can't see any light around me.
That's because the light is coming from you. You can't see it but everyone else can.

You made a poet fall in love with you
And expected her not to write sonnets about your eyes
Haikus about the way you kissed her in the moonlight
Expected the fire in her heart not to inspire couplets
You made a poet fall in love with you, and when you left
Expected her not to write pages about the ache in her chest
Write a soliloquy dedicated to her tears
Expected her not to feel every gut wrenching moment of the pen hitting paper like your words hit her in the most vulnerable places of her mind.
You made a poet fall in love with you, and you expected her to be silent.
That is no fault of hers.

*** with you felt like it was my first time.
it was nice, to feel virginal again.
to be pure.
innocent.
this clean, untouched thing.

arguing with you felt disheartening.
made me scared.
amplified what little doubt I had.
and then there was that one time,
the first time,
and hopefully the last
when you felt like my dad.
(you complained from up on your tower,
about how my complaints were unjustified.
only later to complain about some other matter,
but I was too inside my brain.)
and I had to tell myself there was a reason,
God had a purpose for the pain he was letting me feel -
to thicken my skin
so that nothing and no one could hurt me ever again,
because I wouldn't let them.
wouldn't give them the opportunity.

turn your back
but stay in view at the same time
(now look away,
anything else confuses)

stand still without saying a word

you can’t see but this is how
i separate day from night

and the starless sky
from the empty heart