.
It
is
true,
you are
totally right.
I'm as dry as
a desert, I'm a dead
empty land. I used to be
a  jungle  when  the  clouds
where by my side, and now that
they are gone, my trees, my dreams
they dried and died. Because of this,
nothing grows inside of me, there is
only silence and despair. I can't feel
what  I  write,  I  barely  feel alive
I want to feel human again
Oh god, I really miss
the rain

i cannot stop listening
to songs that make me think of you.
your stupid hair/smile/way of saying things.
stupid//stupid//stupid//stupid
i have written the word
stupid
so many times
i'm beginning to question
if it's even a real word.

does this mean
if i continue to allow you
to plague my thoughts with
your lovely hair/smile/way of saying things,
you will cease
to exist?

i miss you.
i miss your house.
i miss you brother & your sister.
i miss your parents.
i miss our laughs which intertwined so perfect.
i miss your bedroom floor.
i miss your backyard.
i miss our memories.
attempting to make chicken,
attempting to make it through the night.
i miss the way you made me smile.
& most of all,
i miss how happy you made me,
how happy i made you.
i wish, just once,
that i could be back on your floor,
where we could understand each other.
where we could pour our hearts out,
and we would cry & laugh & know that we were forever.
but now,
i feel like i’m falling & the carpet on your bedroom floor isn’t there to catch me.
i miss you.