A self destructive terrorist an anti social embarrassment
not one to sport a bomber vest but the first to volunteer to jump off a cliff not wanting to please god up above just pleading to end his own life due to lack of love this isn't a terrorist in the sense of harmful to others he only harms himself  when he can escape the company of others surrounded by many yet he is alone could never harm a fly but he'll wage war on himself he'll draw plans on his wrist with the razors of bliss and drop bombs of pills into the abyss no children will die no mothers will cry just another heart failure in the works the city will stand and the man will fall he has finally won the war as he breathes his last breath he was just a normal man not a killer he's not the only one the self destructive terrorist he hides in everyone

I can feel the changes...
all around me.
Subtle in some,
drastic in others
...but none are left untouched.

I am kicking and screaming,
attempting to hold on to
... ghosts...
of those that once were
my foundation.

Even the closest...
Have unfamiliar sides emerging.
How silly of me....
to refuse to move too.
How arrogant,
to believe
that I would not be left behind
or made a fool
by holding on...

I am uncomfortable...
floating randomly...,
with no purpose...,
no destination...,
no sense of "home"

i used to think
that words
are the easiest to deliver

i could say i love you
without even knowing why
i could say the truth
without even thinking if it really is

now all of it is as difficult
as I was to believe in fairy tale
now all i could think about
is how will i ever say those words
   without affecting the world
   without hurting someone
   without doubting myself

I remained silent
and those words i wanted to say
left unspoken- shallow

i used to think
that words
are the easiest to deliver
now they're far beyond my reach