Look into my eyes...
         What do you see?
A vision of what you
think I am,
Or actually me.
False identity,
always so quick to judge
You look at me and
         see what you want
Convinced you
have it all figured out
What I'm about,
What Interests me
            An altered version
                 of the person I am
All I ask,
And all I can hope for
Please, try to see me.

Violet desire
A beautiful Silhouette,
doing nothing but being everything
The gleam in your eyes tell
story's of a past
Story's of a future
Your presence is your gift,
with your words of art
You make the mouths drop
& the people talk for hours
of this illustration a true delight.

Heavy hearts
Seen
Through
Heavy
Eyes...
What're we
all holding
on to?

One day you’ll see me in a dream
or in the words of a new book
that catches your interest.

You can think back on the
love affair we shared and
I hope you smile
I always do
So short lived it never
got to blossom but I know it was real.
No matter how our paths
separate I still think of your
laugh, your smile, and
my heart feels full.

I lived in your world for
what felt like a lifetime
but passed by to others
in seconds. 

Deep down I know it
can’t be replaced,
a connection so strong
it felt like I could do anything.

My world was at peace
the moment your lips
pressed against mine.

An addiction sounds negative
but that’s what you were,
my addiction.
What I felt with you is what
everyone wishes to feel:

inspired, beautiful,
on top of this world.
But I know you’ll see me,
and I hope you smile too.

You talked in touch when all I really wanted was to hear the sound of your voice. When the only words we spoke were in between sighs I knew you could never feel the same. You stained my lips with empty words and a hope so strong I eventually broke. The worst part isn’t the promises I thought I saw in your eyes but that I actually believed any of them. My fingertips long for the touch of your skin, to be glued to the inside of your palm where they felt like they belonged. An absence unexplainable because you weren’t even mine to begin with. I felt at home when you wrapped your arms around me so tight I couldn’t breathe, in the best possible way. You taught me what it’s like to miss something so much it hurts, and I’m still here trying to figure out if that’s a bad thing.

Trying to teach me my worth
through your Crimson lips
Don't look at me with those angel eyes,
Making it near impossible to escape
Blood orange, my slim figure
and a snap of the finger
Is that all it usually takes?
A soul of the night, clinging to darkness
But I've become too bright
You wear your skin as a disguise, covering up the feelings that rest beneath the surface

When I think about beauty
           I see laughter
              I see everything I've ever wanted
Driving down the highway,
  Windows rolled down
watching the cool air graze the skin
    Of the person I love
         Holding back from telling them  
          how much they shine
As my whole body fills with butterfly's,
     but they'll know it.
They'll see it and they'll feel it too
Moving through the motions
without overthinking them
  Beauty is all of my favorite things
The excitement of live music
  Or a favorite song on the radio
   Always living for intimate
    shared moments
   Talking about dreams
   as the night turns to day
Time is never a concept when
you're too happy to notice,
and that's beautiful.

Like a butterfly about to take flight,
You will move on
My love you will blossom
You will grow tall,
past the small stems
of the small people around you
They'll try to dim your light
Constantly tearing down
the thoughts that they
just can't understand
But they don't have that power
You're a Sunday morning
too bright to be trapped amongst
the minds around you
Don't hold back,
Please move on and watch
them stare in awe at the beauty
you'll create
A beauty they don't deserve to know

Wild eyes,
A beauty like no other
You lit a fire in everyone at first glance
How is it possible
For one person to bring so much luster
A passion for life that's been lost
in the lack of communication
Misunderstood texts and
nonexistent phone calls
Her voice was heard from
every ounce of her being
She radiated a light that
brightened a room
A delicate flower with
a heart of gold
A heart that could melt
all the bad in the world
She was every piece
of all the good
Never lacking sense
I learned from her to
grow with the world
Grow with the sounds
of my favorite songs
and through the
laughs of every person I met
She taught me to be better
To live through the fire and
always come out brighter

You were heaven and hell,

The devil with a pair
of beautiful wings.

Why did I yearn for the
bruises you left me?

I kissed the scars and
prayed for just a second
more of your time.

I needed it;

the agony,

the pain,

the light
I saw in your eyes.

To fix you?(or to fix myself)

I loved to hate you,
but I loved to want you
simultaneously.

A delicate tragedy, 

when will I learn?

Do beauty and pain
go hand in hand?

Beautiful boy I see your eyes in mine
When I look in the mirror
After every cry, after every worry
You know the struggle
you've lived it and it lives in you
Maybe that's why I feel so close to you
You make me feel like I'm not alone
Like I'm not the only person in the world who lives with these burdens
I see you halfway,
when your dark shade starts to shear
And that's how you see me too

Talking myself into being
okay with the vacant space between us
No words, nothing but empty lines  
It used to be more, it used to be beautiful
A collection of memories
Ones they say last forever
But love, I don't believe it
The moments that seemed everlasting
slipped through the edges of my mind
leaving nothing but traces of dust,
Like they were never there in the first place
Traces of pretty times & pretty smiles
I miss those the most,
the days before I doubted and you drifted away

I learned loss when you walked out the door,
Without a second glance or a warning
When the rain turned to sunshine and
You still weren't around to pick up the phone
When my hair got long & I grew a little taller
I learned what I liked and who I liked,
What interested me &
what I was passionate about
I wanted so badly for you to know who I was
But I couldn't walk in and tell you
We were miles away in distance,
And even farther apart in heart

The people who are supposed to stay
always make it look too easy to walk away
And how quick the people we used to know,
become strangers
It happens lighting fast, overnight
the blink of an eye
But shouldn't  we know by now?
There is comfort in pearmance
But forever is just a myth
Living along side good intentions
& happily ever afters
We want to believe every word that's spoken
So we look past the moments of darkness

A powerful heart,
Covered in suede and dripping with rouge
Pour me out a glass of that red amber,
But try not to taint it with your touch.
For that is my weakness
All consuming, all controlling
Like a rose you carry so much appeal,
Always looking blushed but leaving my hands severed with every connection.

She craved a life deeper than the people around her. A small town with a bunch of crowded thoughts and a bunch of tiny people. She liked the views and the beautiful moments with the few beautiful people who mattered, but other than that- it was a drag. It was the way she viewed the world that made her love it so much, how every little moment mattered. I saw it in her eyes, how much more she saw in every person. Things they didn’t know existed. Things they didn’t recognize until they were with her. Spending endless moments together. I saw her, I knew what she wanted. A beautiful intimate life with a significance that made everything worth while.She had a way about her, a dream. I sat with her and I saw the love in her eyes. She was a dream and nobody saw the world how she viewed it. Through tired sad eyes but with so much beauty. She saw it how I hoped and prayed everyone could see it.
She would break trying to put it back together-
And she did.

You spoke beautiful words,

I watched you and I listened
like every sentence you proclaimed
held the key to a better world.

That’s the scary thing,

You spoke words I needed to hear,

ones that made it all
feel worth it.

Only after I’d fallen would I realize
just how **** useless they really were.

Sending shivers
down my spine
like it was your job
All you knew
was in the contact  
how to love,
how to make
me fall for your
desolate words
So empty
saying so much without
ever saying anything at all
Speak to me,
talk to me in words.
Real words
Not the words you
carve into my body
With every touch.

An almost lover,
its time to say goodbye
the words have been said,
And the door has been closed
What could have been will
Consume me
But I can't let it in  
My darling,
why couldn't it be you
sometimes I think we're the same
The games excite us,
but that's not
enough anymore
This life is no game,
It's too precious to be wasted away
With these wasted words of hope
that you carry between your lips

How’d you make me

feel so much 
without ever 

opening your mouth…

You looked at us

but where was your head?

With her?

with the people
who knew
 you or
with the 
people
you’ve yet to meet?

Always second guessing

Was it real? 

pretending to love

pretending to care

Such a beautiful show

It felt like love.

The way you touched me,

the second our eyes locked
and you couldn’t look away.

Full attention like I was the
only sight in view.

The way we moved together,

a perfect connection.

Two souls with one perfect rhythm.

Breathing simultaneously,

my heartbeat in tune with yours.

I wrapped my arms around you so tight in hopes you’d never let me go…

It sure felt like love,
but we never knew what that meant.

You fill my soul with every glance,
But why can't I look at you?
Every ounce of my being aches
to be beside you, closer to you
as you lay right next to me.
All I can think about,
all consuming.
You give me the good bruises,
The bruises that don't hurt
when I touch them,
When I look at them.
I feel you in my heart,
fighting to come to the surface
as my over thinking
every action mindset
keeps pushing you down
Farther
And
Farther
I can't let it be,
But I know this feeling is right
You make it easy to love you
with beautiful words
All I could want,
A soul that matches mine
In sync with our bodies
pushed against each other
Without the words I still know
the feeling,
I love you
But why can't I look at you?

Darling,
what a beautiful dream you are
Like a combination of a dozen roses
And a million of my favorite things
A sweet song,

With a perfect rhythm.

An alluring tone,
like one I’ve never heard before.

You take my shadows
and force them to be bright.

A hidden gem, 

With the perfect amount
of sincerity and warmth.

Oh what a beautiful delight
you are,
 I hope I never wake up.

You were fast moving

with the slyest amount of caution,

forward but I saw the hesitation.

I should’ve known from the moment you pressed your hand on my cheek.

That extra second you spent in your head
before you made your move.

The softest touch, so sincere. 

Did you know what you were about to do?

How you’d make me
fall in love with every touch,
every look you made in my direction.

You fell too, but never
for more than a second.

I knew how to play the game,
you just knew how to play it better.

My body’s tense

Close to yours

So close

but we never felt adjacent

Promising a
 world of magic

after every drink

Before her,

Before them,

Before I based every

waking thought off your

body language

Forcing myself

to succumb to your “love”

Speaking pretty words

but never pretty actions

Wasted days 

Wasted, always wasted.

Wasting away…

You look at me and all I feel is beautiful  
But Im always this way,
Is that why it's scary for you
I learned how to love who I am without you
Without that power to take it away
I felt my worth in your hands,
So quick to slip through like water
I watched them fill
And saw how easy it was to
wash me away
With every wrong word,
Or disagreement
The person I used to be loved you
And I can still feel her
but I won't let her through

A gentle sigh,
All I can do when I think about you
I want to change your words
Turn you into what you were
The person who knew how to love
Trapped in my head,
I try not to think
How does it feel?
I ask myself over and over
I just want to run to you,
But you taught me its easier to run away.

Contentment rolls off my tongue when I whisper your name, how did I get so lucky?
to open my eyes and see a world of stars that were already in front of me.

You held me in your arms
Watching me grow into myself
Into the person I was supposed to be
I became a piece of you with time
Together we bloomed
You taught me what I needed
to be myself while still
Carrying around some of you
Your wisdom and bad habits
building me from the ground up
I could never understand
Your distance,
but I never doubted you
Every ounce of me misses the old life
Before I only recognized your back,
The life where you loved me,
And you didn't make it look
so easy to walk away.

A day mid spring
The sounds outside were quiet
But the noise inside my head
Was overbearing
You pushed through the door
preaching words of love
and begging for second chances
My innocent eyes believed
the words you fed me
Taking a slow walk towards the door
Leaving nothing but
hope in your traces
You looked back and I felt it
but I couldn't stop you

Take her heart
And tie it with strings
So you're always the one
Always in charge
Always pushing towards
a conclusion,
What you wanted while
she watched her
own life fall
from a distance
Slowly diminishing
You were in control
Making moves
Forced decisions
She wanted to feel
like she was living
along side you,
not with your hands
around her neck.

A bitter heartbeat
So beautiful, but wrong
Can you feel the doubt in my mind
as you're grazing my temple
Moving the hair pressed against my cheek
behind my ears
A gentle embrace,
but I see what you want
Words don't make sense when I'm with you,
I forget the person I want to be,
And turn into want you want
A darkness that matches yours  
To make you feel a little better about
your lack of light,
I just want to make you more
But you only see me in the dark

You needed me.

You breathed me in like
I was the only thing that
could fill your lungs.
You disguised my love,
but you knew it was there.

You felt it in every move I made

and I felt it in you.

How our bodies danced,

separated, 

But always found their way back.

They knew the things we couldn’t always see.

Marlboro boy
You speak words of truth
And exhale fireworks with every breath
You light up worlds
And have pretty girls falling over
every sentence that spills out of you
You embody so much good
I just wish you could see it
It's a pleasure in your presence
but you still have
much to learn
This journey is yours
and my journey is mine
I just can't help but pray
our paths will cross
Between cigarette breaks,
In a new town, with a new job
in a place where you've finally
learned how to love