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Every time I close my eyes
It hurts a little more.

Because I know I'm one night closer
To you being gone.
You say that you must leave me,
Though why I do not know.
I can't move on without you.
Oh God, please do not go.
 Nov 2015 Zhanara
REAL
These nights
Seem odd
Relaxing but out of place
Maybe I am out of place
I came to the conclusion
I think about the future and past too Much
I have forgotten the art of
Enjoying the day
How?
Slipped right out of my  fingers
Perphaps it's my fault
I may have had "fun"
But I fell behind a bit
Now I'm catching up

******* why does society
Make me have to speed of my life up

Why can't I just live off the land
Enjoy the companie  of nature
And the sky

For the remainder of my life

How sad
On a broken leather sofa
By the wall of a music hall
Trying not to be recognised
But failing.

On a dusty old sofa
Relaxed at a friend's gig
Given up on staying secret
Because I was failing.

On a simple brown sofa
Holding hands at a three band show
Her touch comforts, I want to say
But I keep failing.

On a tired too-low sofa
Too-loud music vibrates the floor
My head on her shoulder, wishing to tell her
But failing.

On an unfamiliar sofa
Feeling at home as music blares
Unashamed to be myself with her
Not failing
For once
I am not afraid
With her.
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