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The night before, she whispered,
"The quickest way to break a heart
is to pretend you have one."

Howling,
like you've never heard before.
And she sat next to me, radiating.
Her body jumped with every bump,
as foam blossomed out of her mouth.

And I promised her
that I would get her there in time.
And her dealer promised me
he didn't give her anything.

Howling.
I was howling,
like you and I have never heard before.
And her glazed eyes would open.
And my eyes were wide shut.
Her body lain crooked,
like the antenna of the wrecked car
my grandfather left me.

And I wondered if the planet
was moving too quickly
or if I wasn't moving fast enough -
before I decided the only time
that was real, was now.

Howling.
The police sirens were howling,
like the suburbs have never heard before.
The wails were begging me to pull over.
And the flashes of red and blue
danced across her ivory skin.
She mumbled to her deceased grandma,
and I asked her to stay.

And in that moment,
I tried to numb myself.
I tried to detach
and let the river carry me.

Howling.
I was howling,
like the deputy
had never heard before.
I begged for an escort.
I begged to go back into my car.
He looked at her knotted body
but didn't see her like I saw her.
And he told me to remain calm.
He told me to stop yelling -
but I couldn't express enough.
I couldn't release enough desperation.

And the river carried me
to the rocks before the fall.
At the bottom, I knew she was dying,
and this killed me, most of all.

Howling.
I was howling her name,
like she had heard before -
but not this time.
No, not this time.

The night before, she whispered,
"The quickest way to break a heart
is to pretend you have one."
Elizabeth and God exist in a sunflower grave. Her mother and father slit her stomach open and watched the contents pour out like
spaghetti confetti.

Tommy, Elizabeth's boyfriend, rode his ocean blue Huffy, until the tread on his tires grew bald and until the grips were blanketed by dead skin. Looking for her, panoramic views of the horizon leapt beside him. Silhouettes of his legs, churned and kissed the orange and caramel dusk. With every tear in his hamstrings and calves, the **** in his sky grew and swallowed the memory of Elizabeth Mendenhall, Honor Student.

Margot, Elizabeth's twelve year-old sister, was an idealistic soul. Taking a Sharpie, she wrote on her sister's wall, "Liz, there is no death greater than the loss of self, and no life greater than one where we continuously search for what self is." Margot struggled with concentrating and frying eggs - but focused on the sunflower garden, dangerously and perfectly.

Hilary and Brendan were thirty-five and thirty-six years-old. They stabbed their daughter thirty-seven times. They don't know why they did it, they just couldn't think of a reason not to do it.

She begged for her life. The yellow petals of the sunflowers caught blood-drops and, after enough struggle, floated down to kiss and lay on Elizabeth's slow-twitch body. Hilary looked at Brendan and said, "What does this mean?" Brendan shrugged and said, "This is new to me."

The garden was an oven, and digging her grave was like pulling back on a cheap, plastic latch. Elizabeth had pale, pre-cooked pie crust skin. The slits in her stomach looked like peeks into a cherry stuffed filling. Crinkled lips looked indented by a stainless steel fork, back and forth, side to side. And the soil rained upon her like the reversal of hot vapor, returning home.

Elizabeth and the Sunflower Garden.
I am of dust, from dust.
Time has created me.
And time will **** me.
The greatest serial killer--
Mortality.
I am not a good man.
I will fall again, again.
I am time
(watch
me
watch
me
watch
me)
I am nobody
Eating insanity
I am of attention, from attention
this land of gray rubble--
Endless-- endless
time-- watch it constrict me
watch
please dear god i am not immortal.
I am a dead man.
In a dead land.
I don't know what to do with myself
I am so tired
but your thought runs like a drug in my
veins and I cannot stop
thinking, missing, wanting.
I yearn for another "hello", or just one
good
goodbye...
There was this girl, not knowing where she was going.
At all times she wandered, she tried to forget.
What the real world tasted like—she did not know.

Tell her about the songs the sky creates; she'd like that.
Tell her you'll rescue her when she starts to drown
in them; she'd bleed down your name and not care
about the mess she would make.
As if saving someone, who rather have you deluge them
with more rain, was an offense.

One daybreak, the eighth page of my history book went missing.
The next night it flew into my window glass,
and then landed safely on the isle of my hands. It read:
*            The past is behind.
            The future is ahead and may never arrive.
            Why would you believe in them?*

She used to say there's something calming whenever
darkness wraps up the woods. And the silence that comes after it.
And something blazing bright—a cabin.
Never trust cabins, she once said, burn them before they burn you.
I should have listened.
 May 2015 Tuesday Pixie
rogue
the mortals have found a new god.
our strength is wavering,
flickering,
soon to be extinguished.
like a forgotten match,
left to burn.
our souls ignite into an uncontrollable fire.
ruined temples and desecrated graves.
destruction follows them,
like flames licking at the remnants of an old age
as the ash settles around us.
burn them all.
 May 2015 Tuesday Pixie
Joel Frye
Thinking your feelings?
Try tasting with your earlobe...
wrong ***** is used.
 May 2015 Tuesday Pixie
Lenny M
I survive off Energy,
not negative vibes,
but Positive watts
it sustains my life force,
and uplifts me
to the highest of heights
high above the ceiling,
venturing pass the stratosphere,
until i find myself conversing with celestial beings,
the feeling of feeling,
leaves me open
to all manners of interpretation ,
We are who We are,
when you become vulnerable,
Emotions run ramped explosive like
The Birth of A Dwarf Star ,
anything outside the realm of good intentions ,
I back track , and revert to that of a hermit turtle incased in my shell,
NO ONE ALLOWED !
In the sanctum
not until i can tell the outsider means me no harm
They just want  
my charismatic company
& electric charm
I'm just a battery that can hold it's own charge, Until it is time to share energies
 May 2015 Tuesday Pixie
ZWS
I walk somewhere like my feet are reaching a conclusion
But I meet the next line of my life with intrusion
Wish I could tell you there'll be a happy ending
The story is to be continued, the ending is pending unto
but right now I've got writers block, and I can't think of anyway
To turn the page without you
Just,
Paint your feet green, and I will paint mine blue
Everywhere we walk will be beautiful
and when my paint runs dry
Don't stop walking, don't cry
Just be happy we painted a picture together
and bring it everywhere with you
Bobby,
   I miss you man.  You got your wings to fly to infinity,
Rather than have your feet roam this land.  A few days before you passed, I saw you sitting with a smile in my dreams.  That still frame I now hold onto, and it assists in keeping me at ease.  Few saw the connections in your head rewiring.  It's still hard to imagine your body retiring.  Though your pistons are no longer firing, your soul yet flows.  Energy can never be destroyed, and so it goes, always in motion.  Had we had the clairvoyance to see the outcome, I'd liketo think we would run to you with the potion.  Sometimes it's hard to see beyond the confines of self.  These sobering moments make us realize we are always able to offer help.  ****** buried under the skin now effects the nerves of us all.  You were bigger than your body, and now we know that no impact is too small.  I heard you saved a life, just before you lost yours.  Reminding us to spread our light, forever on this course.  As action put perspective into hypothetical contemplation, I wonder if there would still be the funeral if we had one more conversation.  Inadvertently, you brought so many together.  There we stood with heads bowed down under the rain in a gloomy Tuesday's weather.  The images inside were thought-provoking.  But at a loss, many of us stood outside smoking.  Holding onto a little glimpse of forever, seeing your body at rest to which you were no longer tethered.  You are remembered, and we thank you for the memories.  You shared all you were given, life's simple pleasantries.  Like I envisioned, I wished I would have spoken at your service.  Lingering on your siblings' words, maybe I got nervous.  Where most see a dead-end, eye like to see a new life with purpose.  So I take a deep breath from my chest and offer blessings to your fresh start.  Just know all of us are honored to be a part of your journey, which is eternally embedded in our hearts~

                                  Thank you Bobby,
                                         Talk to you later.
                                                         Much love
1/11/93 - 4/28/15  Rest peacefully brother.
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