I don't know what to think anymore...

How do you hold on to the faith,
When faith has done nothing but laugh in your face?
Tell me if faith knows my pain,
If heart to heart isn't something on my lane.

So many times I fall and recover,
But over and over it's taking it's toll,
And sometimes I feel like I can't keep my hold.

My mind is a mess,
The overthinking and the stress
It's all got me depressed
Then you throw in my heart, now I'm face down in my bed.
I wish someone noticed the tears that I shed...

He can hear the voices so much clearer now.
They have him at the edge.
Starring down the barrel of a loaded gun,
At the tip of the blade,
With nowhere to run.

He's drowned it all in smoke,
But the same words still can't leave his throat.
So now he stands beneath the rope.

"Help me."
His demon's have reasoned for far too long,
Now before you stands a man
With his heart long gone.

Nothing could ever make me love you less,
Yet somehow everything you do makes me love you more.

I love you
With every strand and fibre of my being,
Every ounce of blood in my veins.
My happiness and pain,
Yet for you I'd suffer the strain
If I could bring your heart to my domain.

Oh the flowers blossom and bloom,
Yet my eyes don't wander from you in this room.
You with a smile so tender and true,
That it hooks my heart,
And forever I'll fall for you.

I love you...
But I cannot pull those words from my throat.
I love you, so much...
But the voice in my head says, "don't."

Take me in motherly arms and rock my soul to sleep.
If I keep going through everyday this way,
I'm not gonna keep.

I'm stumbling, fumbling, hurting because you're just out of reach.
So I drown my sorrows in smoke,
Till I dont have to breath.

Give me a hand like your own,
A hand to take hold,
Make me feel like I'm not alone.
If i could give you my all,
For second,
Just know that i would.
If i could say everything,
Then everything,
Is what I'd tell you that you mean to me.
If you could see how I love you
 then maybe
I wouldn't be lonely.

I learned that this is not the place where you find yourself,
But the place that makes you realize you are lost.

Hurts too much to be hurt,
So I'll just be on my own.
Sorry mom,
Couldn't find a girl to bring home.

I wish I wasn't this scared,
Feeling like Fear has a blade to my throat.
Telling me I'll be hurt,
If I try to let it go.

Cold mornings no longer take me by surprise,
I don't wake expecting the brown in your eyes.
Coffee on my own,
No longer makes me feel alone.
They say it's better to have loved and lost,
I say it's safer when you're on your own.