I'm trying
To enjoy
Time with my family
I'm trying
To enjoy
My break from school
I'm trying
To enjoy
The time off I have

But instead
I am spending
My time
Depressed
And down in the dumps
I'm spending
My time
Making everyone else
Miserable
As well
I'm spending
My time
Trying to control
These negative emotions

I want to put
On a smile
And pretend
Like everything
Is fine
As I usually do
But this time
I can't even
Do that

I feel like
A worthless
Piece of trash
Because I always
Have so many
Problems

They seem never-ending
And more seem to come
At a moment's notice
For seemingly no reason

I'm tired
Of feeling this way
I'm tired
Of being so pessimistic
I'm tired
Of letting others down
I'm tired
Of being that one person
No one wants to be around
Because of my mouth
And my thoughts
And my many, many problems

I'm tired of living this life

So I'm going
To make it my goal
To change
And become
Something my brain seems
To not see
For myself

Naturally
I'm not a crier
But sometimes
I have my days
Something could go wrong
And just like that
The dam is broken
And the flooding begins

It could be my grades
Which I am uptight about
It could my relationships
Sinking like a ship
It could be depression
Dragging in its claws
Or anxiety
Being the clingy monster
It is

Naturally
I'm not a crier
But sometimes
I have my days