Waiting for the light
to shine through.
The cracks of broken glass
I've become accustomed to living in.

I'm not really sure how to feel Anymore.
Like screaming help in a room full of deaf people. This is starting to feel hopeless.

I could keep ignoring the facts.
Disregard, every red flag you
wave in front of my face.
Only to pretend things are alright
until I go off the edge.
But doesn't that seem obnoxious?
I'd rather be alone.

Depression is living in a snow globe.
Trapped within the glass like a prisoner.
Staring at the world before you.
As you brace for the storm to hit.

Depression is, living in a snowglobe.
Watching the world move around you.
While you're dealing with the guilt
of waking up disappointed for being alive.
Mania is just making up for lost time.

If my mind could
stop only for a moment.
To catch its breath.

I don't think this
would be so hard.
Breathing in water has never looked so fun.

But I digress.
For I am just at a crossroads waiting to get my guitar tuned.

In the wrong place.
At the right time.
The wheel of misfortune has changed its course.

Screaming colors
at the blind.
Only falls on deaf ears.
Apparently.

My aura
be violent
with ya.

Like backwashed desires.
Regret.
From impulsivites.
Yesterday gave me.

All lost memories of lucid dreams.
Now hungry nightmares.
Staring back at me.
With the same doe eyes.
That used to call, mine.

But if only
for a moment of time.
You could take a walk inside my heart.
To gaze upon the feelings I've been conjuring up for you.

And in the end
are we  nothing more than the
dreams we never lived.

The souls we never let free.
Sedated, we spend our lives numb.
Hibernating with in a cold, empty shell.
One that's constantly getting smaller.
While we seem to always be getting bigger.

Looking for an escape.
Testing the waters, to see if we can really walk the line.
Or if we're just another fabled tragedy of the heart.

But still, in the silence, I know I'm not alone.

The sand, within
our hour glass
marriage
Has run out.
Our life together is over.

What's up?
Divorce court!
A.K.A
just sitting here fighting with my
X,
like two wolves
over a dead deer’s heart.

I've been trying to understand this insanity.
But it's nothing but a losing game for me.
When white is black.
And black is white.
I'm forever searching for a shade of gray.

All my life's worth has already been determined.
By the scales, by the mirrors.
By the people and their words.
My thoughts, intrusive swords.
Weapons used against me
In my own mind.
Against my will.
I'm just fawning in the flames.
Like a deer in the headlights.
The lights are on but nobody's home.

Hunt her down.

Find the witch and burn her like
wicker does by match strike.
If she lives.

Throw her in the lake
and see if she floats.

Praise be, to the unholy Father.
Burn every bridge he ever built.
If it means he'll never reach the surface.
Drown her right out
of his mind.
Delusions light the free world.

Beauty isn't
something you see.
Solely in a mirror's reflection.

I think it's how
you make me feel.
I really never wanted to be here.
In the first place  

But its okay, when I'm with you.

I gazed into the abyss.
Only to see a demon,
staring back at me.

The ghost.
Of someone I was never meant to be.
In the first place.

I'll be rocking out in obscurity.
After all, eccentric
is just the polite way
to call somebody crazy.
Ambivalence is man's best friend.
Because nothing really matters.

I'm just throwing pennies in a well.
Wishing to stay relevant.

Like one does when
keeping up with the Jones's.

Here to fight a losing battle
with the day before me.

Because the night marked me present.
And I'm still here.

Despite all opposition.

I've got the Celiac.
It's making me a maniac.
I'm in a ******* mood.
Don't mess with my food.

You'll probably get assaulted